Source: ShutterStock

This morning I read a really cool story about a woman from Massachusetts, Phoebe Baker Hyde, who stopped shaving, wearing makeup and doing her hair for a full year. As someone who spends way too much time shaving, putting on her makeup and focusing on her hair, I was fascinated. This woman talked about how stopping her daily beauty regime made her feel liberated and more beautiful than ever.

Why did Phoebe do this? She explained on the show Katie that she was sort of starting to feel trapped by her shaving cream, makeup and hair supplies. Before you say that sounds ridiculous, listen to how she explains it – you might be able to relate. She said, “I had become a nervous, critical, angry, insecure woman. I was not the woman or the role model I wanted to be, especially in front of a big-eyed baby daughter. I was at war with the word around me and at war with myself.”

Phoebe went on to explain that she threw out her makeup and cut off all of her hair so that she literally had to put no effort into her appearance. Every day, she “did what a man would do” and only put on deodorant and used a little hair gel. She saved tons of money on beauty supplies, started feeling super comfortable with herself and also gained a lot more free time. Okay, let’s just stop right here. I’m not only fascinated by this woman… I’m also really jealous.

I fee like I could never give up my beauty regime. I feel naked without makeup. I feel uncomfortable when I don’t shave. And I will miss out on events if I’m having a really bad hair day.  Before you call me superficial, hear me out. Sometimes, I wish I didn’t feel this way… but I do. And I honestly can’t imagine a life without wearing makeup, doing my hair or shaving. But I wish I could.

I mean, I love makeup a lot (just look at my bedroom for proof), but I’ve had some moments where I wish it didn’t exist. As much as I love the way eye shadow and eye liner can change up and glam up your entire look, there are some days when applying it is just, ugh, exhausting. Sure, I’ve gone out without makeup on before – but in general, you’ll always catch me with at least a little mascara, eyeliner and foundation on. I just enjoy the way I look with a little makeup on my face.

As for shaving? Don’t even get me started. I hate shaving. Like really, really hate it. But, I don’t know, I just couldn’t imagine going a week, let alone an entire year, without using a razor. Feeling clean shaven makes me feel good about myself. It’s the same with my hair – as annoying as it can be to blow dry it or curl it or whatever, I always feel more confident whenever my hair looks good. Always. Also? Most of the time I like taking a long time to get ready to go somewhere. It’s kind of like my me time.

The point is, I don’t really think there’s anything wrong with feeling more confident from shaving or wearing makeup or doing your hair. I think that everyone feels confident from different things and I think that generally people should do what works for them. But I can also admire a woman who can stop doing all of those things and feel confident in her own skin. That’s pretty cool. And I’m jealous because, seriously, think about all of the free time I would have if I stopped shaving and doing my makeup and hair? So much free time! I would stop being late everywhere and also I could watch more TV. That’s pretty important.

In the end, I think this would be kind of a cool experiment to try… one day. Maybe not any day soon. Because as jealous as I am of this woman, I do genuinely enjoy my beauty regime… and I don’t see us parting any time soon.

What do you think? Could you go a year without shaving or wearing makeup or doing your hair? Why or why not? Tell us in the comments.

I have hairy legs and I like it that way

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Source: ShutterStock

Ouch. I’m sure we’ve all felt your pain at some point, girl. Ingrown hairs are super annoying, but fortunately there are a few ways that you can try preventing them.

Shaving is the main cause of ingrown hairs, so the best possible way to prevent them from coming would be to stop shaving altogether. It’s totally understandable if that’s not an option – however, if it’s possible for you to start getting waxed down there rather than shaving yourself, you may want to try that. Although waxing still leaves room for ingrown hairs, it isn’t as bad as shaving as is.

If you’d like to keep shaving it yourself, there are a few easy ways to help prevent these pesky little hairs. Make sure you’re changing your razor blade on a regular basis. Dull blades can not only cause ingrown hair, but they’re also more painful in general.  Be sure you’re moisturizing your down there area before you shave. The best time to shave is when you’re in the shower or right after a hot shower, when the skin is softer and the hair is easier to pull out. Use a moisturizing shaving cream instead of a bar of soap.

Also make sure that when you shave, you’re shaving in the direction that the hair grows. Don’t just shave in every direction possible. Also, don’t shave over one section too many times. If none of that helps, maybe try an alternate way of removing hair.

If you do get a super painful ingrown hair, try using some of these products to soothe it. Mainly, you just need to be careful about how you’re shaving. Take your time and go slowly.

take care,
Heather

What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at heather@gurl.com

I shaved down there and now it’s all bumpy. WTF?!

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Source: ShutterStock

In news that will shock the pants off of you, a new study has discovered that women shave down there mainly when they’re going to have sex. Um, thank you, completely pointless study. I really needed you to tell me that women try to tidy up their vaginas before they have sex. JK, I knew that already because it’s completely obvious.

To be more specific, sexuality researchers recently got together 2,453 women ages 18-68 and studied their shaving habits down there and their sex lives over a five week period. They discovered that the days women shaved down there were usually also the days women had sex, were more interested in sex and had sex for a longer amount of time.

In case you couldn’t tell from the above, I am not surprised by this study at all. While I’m sure there are women out there who shave their who-ha’s just for the heck of it, I know that a lot of girls only shave their pubes when they know that someone else is going to be down there. And there’s nothing wrong with that! It’s totally normal and fine to want to clean up a little bit when you know someone is going to be super close to your most intimate areas.

I was surprised about one thing, though – the study also found that 42.5 percent of women didn’t shave down there at all over the course of the five week study. Maybe it’s just me, but I had kind of assumed that everyone was shaving off their pubic hair. I’m actually kind of relieved to see that they aren’t. I sort of hate that society seems to expect women to be completely bare down there – not only because it gives us so much extra work to do, but also because we don’t seem to always expect the same thing from guys.

So does the fact that you shave down there mean you’re always going out and having wild nights of casual sex? Um, no. That’s a silly statement to make. What this means is that the main reason women are shaving down there is because they’re going to have sex. And, like I said, that’s pretty obvious. Shaving down there is annoying! I’m certainly not about to do it for no reason at all, and I’m sure a lot of other girls feel that way. But I want to know what YOU think, so…

What do you think – do you shave down there? Do you only shave down there if you’re going to hook up? Or do you do it for yourself? Tell us in the comments!

Would you stop shaving for a month?

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Would you do it?

You know how guys have Movember… their special month of the year where they can raise awareness for cancer by not shaving their mustaches? Aren’t you a teensy bit jealous of the dudes that participate? I mean, for a whole month they get to lose their razor and stop worrying about whatever kind of hair grows on their face and no one will make fun of them because it’s for cancer. As a girl who can’t stand shaving (even though I still do it), I for one am very jealous of them.

So wouldn’t it be sort of nice to have a lady-version of Movember? Maybe something like… Decembeaver? Um, yes! Decembeaver is month where us girls can put down our razor when it comes to shaving down there and we don’t have to feel bad about it at all because it’s for cancer! Who’s with me?!

A few awesome ladies put together this Decembeaver video, calling out to girls to support them in their fight against cancer by leaving your beaver hair alone during the month of December. Um, okay, maybe this is a joke. But wouldn’t it be sort of awesome if it was legit?

Can you girls imagine how dudes would respond if we all really got in on this? I think it would totally be something like how the guys in this video reacted. They’d be all disappointed and sad, which is lame, because it’s just a little hair and they need to suck it up. But they wouldn’t even be able to protest too much because then they would just look like a jerk for not supporting your anti-cancer movement.

So do you want to “take the ootch out of your cootch?” “Take the ah out of your who-hah?” Then participate in Decembeaver! And watch this video because it’s pretty amazing:

Would you participate it in Decembeaver (if it were real)? Do you shave down there? Would you ever stop shaving down there? Tell us in the comments!

Take a survey all about your body hair

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Got something brewing down there? | Source: ShutterStock

Is the bump on my vagina an ingrown hair or something more serious?

ChickRx expert Dr. Diana Hoppe, Ob/Gyn and Sexual Health Expert says:

Glad you asked that question. I have a lot of young women who come into my office very concerned about bumps on their pubic area. For the most part, a little education in ingrown hairs could save them a whole lot of worrying.

So, an ingrown hair infection usually occurs after shaving. There will be redness around certain hair follicles. Typically, these aren’t that big. (Think less than pea size.) The follicle will be surrounded by only a small amount of redness. This redness is the inflammation caused by the infection.

While ingrown hairs aren’t pretty or fun, they’re nothing to freak over. They are best controlled by applying an anti-bacterial ointment immediately after shaving your bikini line or really, anywhere on your pelvic area. Bacitracin works really well. It’s an ointment that you can get at any drug store.

If the area becomes more red and inflamed and the bump is bigger than a pea, it could be a different kind of infection. For example, the bump could actually be an abscess. This kind of bump on your vagina needs to be looked at by a doctor. It might need to be drained or you could be put on antibiotics to fix it.

I’m just talking about bumps on the hairy part of your pubic region now because you asked about ingrown hairs. If you notice a bump or lesion on the inner, pink area (or the vulva), you should definitely talk to a doctor. That could mean something a bit more serious is brewing…or it could be nothing. But, when in doubt, always seek medical advice. We doctors are around for a reason!

More from ChickRX:
I think I have a bikini line cyst. What should I do?

Is Your Doctor Encouraging Unsafe Sex?

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Facial hair isn’t a big deal to Balpreet Kaur, because her spirituality is. | Source

Balpreet Kaur probably had a pretty awkward start to her week. She was photographed recently, not to her knowledge, while waiting in line at her college library–and then the photo was posted in Reddit’s “Funny” section with the backhanded caption, “I’m not sure what to conclude from this.” Ouch!

Balpreet didn’t even know about any of it until a pal on Facebook told her that, “Well, hey! You’re on Reddit!” She received a lot of ignorant and mean-spirited comments, both about her outfit (with which we don’t see a problem whatsoever–who hasn’t worn yoga pants and a tee around campus?), her turban, and, most of all, her facial hair.

While we’re not that used to seeing that much facial hair on women and girls in Western society, where we’re pretty much urged to pluck, bleach, wax, buff, and shave every inch of our bodies and faces, Balpreet Kaur is au naturale–and honestly, it’s a pretty refreshing statement not only about the vanity of society, but also of her own faith.

Balpreet is a baptized Sikh, and when she found out that her photo was posted on Reddit, she actually replied to it and gracefully, tactfully, and respectfully slayed all of her naysayers. “I’m not embarrassed or even humiliated by the attention (negative and positive) that this picture is getting because it’s who I am,” she said simply. “Yes, I’m a baptized Sikh woman with facial hair. Yes, I realize that my gender is often confused and I look different than most women. However, baptized Sikhs believe in the sacredness of this body – it is a gift that has been given to us by the Divine Being (which is genderless, actually) and, must keep it intact as a submission to the divine will.” Bam!

She explains further why it’s pointless to point out her differences–because, well, she has better things to do than tweeze. She’s just happy her body works. “Just as a child doesn’t reject the gift of his/her parents, Sikhs do not reject the body that has been given to us. By crying ‘mine, mine’ and changing this body-tool, we are essentially living in ego and creating a separateness between ourselves and the divinity within us,” she explained. “By transcending societal views of beauty, I believe that I can focus more on my actions. My attitude and thoughts and actions have more value in them than my body because I recognize that this body is just going to become ash in the end, so why fuss about it? When I die, no one is going to remember what I looked like, heck, my kids will forget my voice, and slowly, all physical memory will fade away. However, my impact and legacy will remain, and, by not focusing on the physical beauty, I have time to cultivate those inner virtues and hopefully, focus my life on creating change and progress for this world in any way I can. So, to me, my face isn’t important but the smile and the happiness that lie behind the face are.”

She even told everyone about why she–and a lot of others–wears a turban, writing, “Wearing turbans for women is a sign of inner strength and empowerment because we, too, are equal to Sikh men. Sikhism advocates total equality for both genders (the only difference between them are the last names) and therefore, it is okay, however rare the occurrence, for a woman to adorn herself with the turban just like her male counterparts.”

Alright haters, how about some aloe for that burn?

Balpreet Kaur’s maturity and spiritual steadfastness are so freakin’ awesome, and a lot of people took to Reddit to respond to her and give her the props she was most definitely due. Anyone who’s spent even a minute on any sort of commenting forum (except Gurl, obviously, because you guys are smart, lovely, classy and amazing) knows that a lot of bottom feeders and jerks come out and bully strangers because they feel invincible with a screen and keyboard between themselves and the world. To not only not be intimidated by that, but also to not stoop to its level in response, shows that Balpreet Kaur may look different from our ideal–but her inner beauty is one standard we should all strive for. You go, girl!

Have you ever struggled with facial hair? Do you look different from your peers and get picked on for it? What would you do if you found yourself going viral? Tell us in the comments!

Here’s how to deal when you think you don’t fit in!

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Um, where is this razor supposed to go, exactly? | Source: ShutterStock

I’m not exactly sure when shaving “down there” became super popular, but all I know is that it is. A lot of girls feel pressured to get rid of their pubic hair, and lately, it seems like more guys expect girls to do so. But even though it might feel like this is something only girls do, that’s not true – plenty of guys are taking their razors down south also.

So the question is: do you want your boyfriend/hookup buddy to shave down there? Does it matter to you if he’s got hair in that area? I saw this discussion in the message boards and knew I had to get more opinions. Read what these girls think and then fill us in on what you think about dudes shaving down there.

amused said:
So I just got sexually involved with a guy and found out that he shaves himself completely bald eagle!! He has very fine body hair, but said he’s been shaving down there for three years. I immediately decided that I like it (a lot!)… but my question is: have any of you found a guy like this? How many guys do you think do this?

LotusFlower182 said:
My FWB trims it. He doesn’t go bald. I’m fine as long as there’s not a friggin’ forest down there. Men are hairy creatures, anyway.

leothelion_89 said:
I think it’s more socially acceptable for guys to shave than it once was, but I’m not sure if I would call it common.

I know my boyfriend agreed to try it when I told him I thought I would like it. It turns out I LOVE it. Now he does it for me quite often!

It’s definitely become more socially acceptable for dudes to shave down there. But no matter how much you like it or don’t like it, you should never pressure a guy into doing it. If he wants to get rid of his pubic hair, let him. If he wants to keep it hairy, that’s his choice. The main thing to remember is that it’s his body, so he gets to decide what’s happening down there.

And you shouldn’t feel like you have to like it either. Just because shaving down there has become more popular doesn’t mean every single person has to be into it. In the end, there’s no reason to stress about body hair. We all have it, whether we like it or not!

How do you feel about guys shaving down there? Do you think they should? Have you ever dated a guy who did? Tell us in the comments!

What do YOU do about shaving down there?

This stinks! | Source: Shutterstock

Despite having the exact same stuff in your basket, just in different colors, and your boy bud having more than you do, you get charged way more than he did. WTF?

Truth is, this happens every day. It’s called gendered pricing, and it basically revolves around the idea that women will pay more for beauty and health products. And it works–we typically spend $1,000 or more every year on products that are marketed directly to women (think pink, flowery packaging versus guys’ silver and blue style stuff) than dudes do. And get this–the product ingredients tend to be exactly the same. Our friends at Blisstree actually compared a leading women’s deodorant with the men’s equivalent, and the ingredient lists were nearly identical. (Seriously, check out the lists. Unreal!)

We'll have what he's having. | Source: Shutterstock

Considering they have almost the exact same ingredients in them–and that the men’s deodorant was bigger–why on Earth would the women’s deodorant cost a buck more?! Shady, right?

The case is pretty similar for items like shampoo, conditioner, and razors, too. The makers and marketers of health products play to women’s insecurities (you’re hairy, you’re smelly, your hair isn’t shiny enough, you skin isn’t smooth enough) as a means to get us to pay more for the same stuff that guys get for a lot cheaper than we do. Not cool at all. A lot of women and girls are insecure as it is, so to market items towards us by playing into how awkward and inadequate we can feel is a pretty low blow.

If these were pink, they'd be a lot pricier. | Source: Shutterstock

Another trick they use? Next time you go shopping, you’ll notice that men’s and women’s products are often displayed separately. This is in part to avoid comparison shopping–by putting men’s shampoo, body wash, and razors in their own section, you’re probably less likely to pick them up and check the price next to your more expensive women’s versions of the same stuff. Sneaky!

There are ways to get around gender marketing, though. One way is to buy men’s stuff! The razors guys use to keep their faces baby smooth? They work just as well on your gams. The deodorant they use to stop stinking after gym class works just as well on you, and it usually smells pretty awesome and fresh. (If you don’t like  the scent, you can always buy guys’ unscented deodorant and accompany it with a spritz of your own fave feminine perfume!) Gender neutral products are also cheaper–ones that aren’t directed towards men or women. (Think of items in white, green, yellow, or blue packaging.) If enough of us do this, we may be able to convince advertisers and manufacturers to rethink their strategy!

This isn’t to say you shouldn’t splurge on stuff you really love. But in cases like these, when you’re both saving money and preserving your self-respect and self-esteem? That’s a pretty sweet deal.

Have you ever used men’s products instead of women’s? Do you think gender marketing should be allowed? Tell us in the comments!

Doesn't look so bad, does it?

I first got the idea to stop shaving my legs in high school, when I was shocked to see a friend’s hairy legs sticking out from under her skirt. When I asked why she’d let her leg hair grow, she said something like, “I don’t see why I have to shave.” This seemed like a perfectly good answer, and so, out of my own curiosity, I decided to stop shaving immediately, after five years of doing so religiously.

Fast forward many years, and here I am, sitting around in shorts with my leg hair visible in all its glory. Once I grew out my leg hair and got used to the feel of it blowing in the breeze (got to admit, that was pretty weird at first), I came to the same conclusion as my friend: why do I need to shave my legs? Because commercials and magazines tell me I need to? Because it’s expected of me by my society? It has no impact on my health, intelligence, or, truthfully, my ability to get dates. (One rather conservative guy, upon learning my legs are au natural, asked me, snidely, if guys ever date me. Yes, idiot, they do. And I would NEVER date anyone who cared so much about leg hair that it would be a dealbreaker. Appreciate me for me, not for having hairless legs).

“Can I touch it?” people ask me, upon seeing it. I guess having hairy legs makes me somehow exotic. I’m happy to let folks feel it, and they frequently seem startled that it’s soft. Yep. Soft leg hair. It’s not long; I just measured it at about 1-1.5 cm, and much like your arm hair or your eyelashes, it hits a certain length and stops growing. Don’t pay attention to that “if you shave it and let it grow back, it’s super dark and worse than ever,” because it’s not.

Free your legs, ladies! | Source: Shutterstock

To answer a question people ask all the time: yes, I do shave my armpits. I grew out that hair once, and I didn’t mind how it looked, but having hairy armpits made me even more in need of deodorant, and I drew the line at being stinky. So yes, smooth pits, although I’m also lazy about keeping them stubble-free.

What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without shaving? Have you ever thought about letting your leg hair be natural? Could you ever commit to having hairy legs? Tell me everything in the comments!

This Girl Wears Makeup To The Gym–Are You That Makeup Obsessed, Too?

Do you go totally bare? | Source: ShutterStock

It doesn’t matter who you are, we all have one thing in common: we’ve all got hair down there. It doesn’t matter how much you hate it or how much it embarrasses you: it’s always going to be there. Well, unless you do something to get rid of it, that is.

Which type of girl are you: do you shave off all of your pubic hair all the time? Do you wax? Would you or have you ever gotten is laser treatment? Or do you embrace those hairs and stay all natural? We saw this post in the message boards and we want to know how you girls feel about hair down there. Read what these girls had to say and let us know: should you get rid of it, or leave it as is?

dance2themusic asked:
Okay, so I know that everyone says its up to you whether or not you keep your hair “down there”. But I want to know if YOU personally shave or wax. And if you do, how much?

sweetness said:
I shave the bikini line and trim the rest too. I think that doing away with it entirely is a little bit odd… that’s what little children look like. If a guy wants a real woman- he’s gotta want the whole thing and real women have hair down there. Also, even in X rated movies mostly the women HAVE hair there. so… i guess choose what you feel comfortable with. A guy won’t be turned off by hair.

Mad4Boys said:
I shaved all of mine two days ago. It looked really weird at first when I looked down (not so much in the mirror), but I’ve got used to it now and feel so much sexier!

What do we think you should do about your pubic hair? Well, it’s really entirely your decision and it’s all about what makes you feel comfortable. Don’t shave or wax just because you want to impress a dude! Only take it all off if that’s what you like.

What do you think girls should do? How do you deal with hair down there? Tell us in the comments!

This girl shaved down there and it stings – check out Heather’s advice