Do your parents watch your every phone move? | Source: Shutterstock.com

Dealing with smartphone contracts through your cell phone provider can already be a hassle. But what if you had to sign another iPhone contract – one that your parents wrote for you?

Well, that’s the story for one 13-year-old boy, who got a smartphone for Christmas along with an iPhone contract of 18 rules that were written by his mom. The story has generated some debate, and I want to know what you guys think.

I feel like if my parents handed me this particular contract when they gave me a phone, I would just be like “OKAY, YEAH, WHATEVER, I SIGN, LET ME PLAY ANGRY BIRDS NOW!” Then later when I actually read through the rules, I know that to a few of them, teen me would have said “WTF?” (in my head of course, as my mom would not be happy with that language).

According to a few of the rules, her son can’t bring it to school, shouldn’t have it out in public and he also should be cool with leaving it at home a lot of the time. For that last one, the mom tells her son not be worried about having FOMO (props to this mom for knowing what that is!) if he doesn’t have his phone. I think teenager Meg would be more worried about having FONGMAP or “fear of nobody getting me after practice,” and I’m actually pretty sure that is the only reason my parents even bought me a cell phone as a teen.

If my parents tried to lay out when and where I could use my iPhone, regardless of their good intentions, I think the first message I’d take away is “You don’t trust me to be responsible.” The mom who wrote the contract has said that she hasn’t gotten that response from her son, but she has from other people commenting on her rules.

Source: Shutterstock.com

Still, in the grand scheme of the contract, I do think this mom here offers talking points on some important topics that maybe aren’t at the front of every teen’s mind. Things like the consequences of taking naked pictures or not walking around with your eyes glued to your phone (which can be really dangerous).

As much as I could see my teen self being totally offended by my mom handing me this iPhone contract, I totally feel for this mom. If you’ve ever babysat, you know the kind of panic there is when you realize all of the things that could go wrong. I imagine for parents it is like that every single day and you just want to keep your kids safe and also well-rounded. Different things work for different families, and if this iPhone contract works well for them, then awesome.

Personally, I know I’m going to be a totally overprotective mom. It’s just my personality. I pledge now though to keep in mind that when future mom Meg is writing up a list of phone rules (or by that point, who knows what technology we will have), I will take a second to consider how teen Meg would have felt about the whole thing and proceed from there so everyone in my family is happy.

Do you agree with some of the rules in this iPhone contract? Did your parents make you sign some kind of contract before getting your smartphone? If your parents gave you these rules about how to use your iPhone, what would you say? Tell us in the comments!

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Did someone really roofy her own parents just to go online?! | Source: ShutterStock

We know the Internet is a big deal, but would it lead you to slip drugs to your parents?!

Reports say that a girl in California was having a friend over on a Friday night and they wanted to go online. Problem was, her parents turned off her Internet connection at 10:00 PM. (It’s unclear whether it was automatic or if her parents manually did it themselves each night.) So what did the gal and her pal do? They bought her parents milkshakes . . . and laced them with sleeping pills so they could go online. WTF?!

Cops said her parents finished only about a quarter of their milkshakes before they started getting sleepy, and they stopped because they tasted weird and felt grainy. So gross and so scary! The girl’s friend gave her a ton of prescription sleeping pills to pretty much roofy her parents with so they could go online.

Her parents fell asleep, then woke up a few hours later feeling hungover, but went back to sleep. When they woke up in the morning and still felt groggy and sick, they went to the police station to take drug tests. When the parents tested positive for the drugs, they told the cops what happened–and the girl and her friend were arrested and shoved in juvenile hall. Police said that if the girls were 18 or over, they could have been facing legit prison time. Just to go online. Is it really worth it? (Spoiler alert: It’s not.)

When cops asked the girls what happened, the daughter of the roofied parents basically just said their Internet rules were “too strict.” Dude. Is your FOMO that bad that you risk making your parents super sick–or worse–and get yourself thrown behind bars? And um, just to go online on a Friday night?

No one knows what the girls planned on doing once they got Internet access, but it doesn’t matter. Listen. We love you, and we really love that you read our stuff here on Gurl. But if you have to roofy your parents to connect to the Internet, it’s probably not worth it. Just wait until the morning. Or, you know, go to a friend’s house whose parents let her log on at night–or maybe just ask your folks to let you stay on later for once. Whatever you do, please don’t slip sleeping pills to mom and dad.

Would you ever drug your parents to get what you wanted? Do you think this girl should be punished for slipping sleeping pills to her parents? Why do you think she felt the need to roofy her parents to go online? Tell us in the comments!

What are your parents doing on FB?!

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Are you meeting your boo’s parents this winter break? Or, you know, ever? Then you probably want to make the best impression you can. Sara knows exactly how to do that! (Spoiler alert: being yourself is a big part of it!) Watch the video, though, for other helpful hints on how to woo your dude or dudette’s parents.

Got a Q for Sara? Put it in the comments and it could be next week’s topic!

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You probably won’t friend your parents on Facebook–but they’ll friend you… And embarrass you if you’re a guy! | Source: ShutterStock

Mark Zuckerberg and Co. released some pretty interesting info about parents on Facebook–and how we interact with them. (Before we continue: Let’s be real, most of us probably try to avoid our parents on Facebook, or at least block them from seeing what we post on our BFF’s walls or comment on our crush’s pictures.)

When you’re 13 or under, you’re a lot more likely–60 percent more likely, in fact–to friend your parents on Facebook before they’ll request you. That reverses as you get older, though, likely because you’re all like, “Mom, stop lurking me!” and want more privacy. (Which is totally your right!)

After you graduate college it reverses again when you’re all like, “Hey dad? I kinda miss you. Mom, you really are a better cook than I said.” You have less to hide and more to share, so it makes sense.

Your folks are also a lot more likely than you are to initiate not just a Facebook friendship, but also a conversation. And you, as girls, are a lot more likely to engage in a Facebook chat with your parents than your brothers will, which can probably be attributed to a few things: You’re cooler (duh) and the fact that women and girls are typically more communicative.

Here’s what’s kind of amusing. Facebook looked over the public messages between kids and parents on Facebook (thank goodness they didn’t need to invade your privacy further for this), and the words they used were hilarious and somewhat predictable. Parents on Facebook typically say nice things like “I’m so proud, “all my heart,” “well done,” “proud of you,” and “call me,” but moms and dads differed in their pet names. (Awwww!)

When talking to sons, especially, parents on Facebook changed their individual tunes: Moms get mushy, calling their male offspring “my little boy” and “my handsome son.” Maybe that’s why boys don’t respond as much–stop embarrassing them, mom!

As for dads? They prefer “buddy,” “dude,” and, well, profanities.

Dude. Aren’t you glad you’re a girl?

Are you friends with your parents on Facebook? Have your parents ever written something embarrassing on your Facebook wall or photos? Did you friend your parents on Facebook or did they request you first? Do you hide stuff from your parents on Facebook? Tell us in the comments!

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It stinks when they don’t approve. | Source: ShutterStock

Imagine you’re dating someone perfect. You really like the person, they really like you. You too get along great, you have a lot of fun together and everything is basically amazing – except for the fact that parents are getting in the way. What would you do if your boyfriend’s mom didn’t want you two together?

That’s happening to someone right now, and when I saw her story in our message boards, I knew I had to share it. It totally stinks when your boyfriend’s mom tries to get in the middle of your relationship. So how is this girl supposed to deal? Read her story, see what some girls had to say and then let us in on your own advice.

CarissaM said:
My boyfriend (who happens to be the love of my life) and I have been together for almost a year. We started out like any typical couple would, learning about each other and our lives. We found out we had a lot in common and we seemed great for each other. About a month into our relationship, I met his parents and they approved. He was happy, his grades improved. Then he found out that I used to be depressed/slightly suicidal and wanted me to promise him that I would never be again.

I sent him a message on Facebook explaining that I take the bad things that happen in my life to heart. But I also told him that it would most likely never happen as long as I had him and my friends. Well, a few weeks later, his mom decided she could dig through his Facebook. She found the message and demanded he dump me. Of course, that didn’t happen.

We hid our relationship after that since she had teachers watching us. When she found out we didn’t break up she forced him to call me and dump me (which was obviously not real). She just recently found out we’re still together and said I’m never to text him again or she’ll put a restraining order on me. This is really starting to wear on our relationship. I’m so sick and tired of hiding and hurting. I cry myself to sleep sometimes. I want to marry this boy, he’s perfect for me. But I’m scared she’ll never give up. Any advice?

Try talking to her yourself. | Source: ShutterStock

reverie0711 said:
Maybe you and your boyfriend should sit down with his mom and talk out the situation. Clearly, she’s going through quite a lot right now so she’s probably having trouble dealing with stressful situations, especially something that she worries will hurt someone she loves. But if you get the chance to explain to her that you feel secure in your life right now and have no intention of hurting her son, you may be able to work something out. Talking to her face to face may also give her a chance to get to know you and remember why she liked you before. You could also consider talking to your own parents about it, if you feel like having them to help you talk to her will help.

hotjamale said:
How old is your BF? That is absolutely ridiculous of his mother to do, and reading his texts and Facebook is such an invasion of privacy. Why doesn’t he put a password on his phone and change his password to his Facebook/make a whole new account? His mother is looking for any reason to dislike you and she has no justifiable one at all. If he can, I would really suggest your boyfriend move out. 

My advice? Try talking to his mom calmly before you suggest your boyfriend rebel any further. Explain to her how much you love her son and you don’t want to hurt him. Let her know how much her approval would mean to you. Maybe agree to set some boundaries at first to ease her mind. Try to compromise without totally sacrificing your relationship and see if she’ll give you a chance.

As for the fact that she went through your BF’s stuff – that’s definitely not right. But that’s something he needs to settle with his mom on his own. You can suggest they talk but don’t force him into a fight with her. That will only push her away from you more.

What’s your advice for dealing with a parent like this? Have you ever been in this situation? Tell us in the comments!

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Sara’s been giving tons of advice on how to convince parents to let you do something and this week, she’s got another helpful parent how to—getting them to let you wear make up! A.K.A., the parental compromise gateway drug. (We just made that up, but it totally works. Spread it around.) So hit play if you want some help convincing Mom and Dad that it’s time for you to step it up in the make up department.

Are your parents cool with you wearing makeup? If yes, how’d you convince them? Tell us in the comments!

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I had no idea what to do! | Source: Shutterstock

Well, it would have been if I hadn’t had the great idea to invite a couple of friends over (including my boyfriend) one night to have a little house party. The plan seemed perfect at the time. Obviously, no parents were there, so we would have the place to ourselves. I had gotten one of my older friends to pick up some drinks (BAD IDEA, LADIES–do not be like me!) and made a playlist for the night.

The party went off as planned without a hitch. Everyone had left and headed home around 2 a.m. and only my boyfriend and I were still there, cuddled up on the couch. Long story short, we had sex.

He helped me clean up the whole house the next morning and we parted ways after snacking on some of the food in the pantry. Everything seemed perfectly fine. We had gotten away with it! Or at least that’s what I thought. It wasn’t until I got a call from my mom’s friend that I realized how badly shit had hit the fan.

All she asked me was “Did you have someone over while we were out of town?” I took a second to think about how to word my answer. Did she know I had a party? Did she know that we were drinking? I had no clue what she had found. “I found a condom in the downstairs bathroom.” BAM. There was my answer.

She ended up giving me an ultimatum. She told me that either I would have to tell my mom that I was “sexually active” and talk to her about getting on the pill, or she would tell my mom what she found. I had no idea which option was worse. I couldn’t imagine telling my mom that I was having sex, but I definitely didn’t want to experience the truth-induced shit storm I would have to go through if my mom heard it from someone else.

I ended up picking option number one. It definitely went along the lines I had expected. She was furious. She yelled at me and told me that I was irresponsible. She cried and I cried. Then she pulled me into her arms and hugged me. She apologized for being harsh, she told me that she had always been nervous about having this conversation, she said that she was glad that I was responsible enough to ask to get on birth control, she was happy that I had told her.

I had never planned on straight up telling my mom I was having sex and I definitely hadn’t intended on telling her at that time. But I guess, in a way, I’m glad that it all happened that way. It all worked out, and it felt good to have my mom on my side.

Would you talk to your mom about sex? Tell me in the comments!

Here’s More On How To Talk To Your Mom About Sex

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Seriously, give us a break! | Source: Shutterstock

We love you. We really do. And we appreciate all the insane things you’ve done for us (no, that time I dropped my locket in the toilet and you fished it out for me has not been forgotten!)–but could you please stop nagging us about the most stupid things? When we were younger, you nagging us to do things like brushing our teeth or tying our shoe laces was actually helpful, because we didn’t know what the hell we were doing. But now that we’re a little more grown up, there are a few nagging points you can feel free to let go of. In fact, here are five things we’d love you to stop nagging us about right away:

1. Standing Up Straight
Mom? You want to know the truth? When you’re not around, we all stand up so straight it’s like we’ve gained 3 inches. We just slouch to piss you off. Never fails. Want us to walk taller? Stop nagging us about it!

2. Wearing Less/More/Different Makeup
Some of us wear makeup because we like the way it looks. Some of us like the way we look without makeup even better. Yes, sometimes we’ll make not-so-glamorous decisions and cringe while looking back on our own photos years later, but isn’t that our right? You wore some weird looks back in the day, too (we’ve seen pictures), so let it go.

3. Dating Nicer Boys
First off, mom, you don’t even know what the guys at school are like. If you could actually spend time with all of them and got to know them pretty well, I think you’d know we’re making the best decisions we really can because HOO BOY, there’s not a lot to choose from. Plus, um, it’s not like we’re old enough to get married or anything at this point. Can’t we date some weirdos before settling down?!

4. Missing Curfew (By 10 Minutes)
If the worst thing I do is come home 10 minutes late, I think you know I’m a pretty good daughter/person/citizen of the world. I’m still coming home in one piece and probably even being cool enough to call and let you know I’ll be late. Give me a break once in a while, okay? There is this thing called traffic . . .

5. Being More Like That Nice Neighbor Girl
Don’t even get me started on this one, Moms. Usually the “nice” girl you compare us to is a total back-stabbing bitch who only seems super nice on the surface. You have no idea. Every time you tell us to be more like her, you’re actually telling us to lie, cheat, and generally be a selfish jerk. Stick to what you know, Moms, and appreciate the awesome daughters you have.

Love,
All The Gurls Of The World

Want to get in on the end of nagging? YourTango has declared this week Nag-Free Week! Check ‘em out for details.

Is your mom always nagging you? Tell us what you wish she’d stop nagging you about in the comments!

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Birth control pills are nothing to be ashamed of. | Source: Shutterstock

I went to visit my parents for a weekend recently, and I brought my birth control pills with me–because, well, you’re supposed to take them every single day, and without them, my periods are heavy and make me really sick (something I inherited from my mom’s genes). I left my birth control pills as well as an antibiotic for a stupid sinus infection at my usual seat at their kitchen table, that way I’d remember to take them both with my breakfast.

Except when I woke up and groggily went to pop my pills with my Peanut Butter Crunch, the tiny green monthly pack was missing. I thought maybe I forgot to take it out of my bag, or that I left it in my old room, but after a ton of digging in every imaginable place I could have left it, they were still gone. I wound up having to take my pill a lot later than normal because the pack was MIA.

Eventually I asked my mom if she’d seen them. Guess what? She did. Why? Because she hid them from me. WTF? Yes, my own mother hid my birth control pills. Why did she do that? “Because I don’t want those things out,” she whispered. “They’re embarrassing!”

Uh, okay. Taking pills to make sure my cramps don’t make me miss work to stay in the fetal position for a week is embarrassing? Being sexually healthy and responsible is shameful? I don’t understand her line of thinking, because my mom doesn’t even know who Rush Limbaugh is. And by all accounts, she’d probably detest him as much as we do. But apparently she, like the ignorant radio douchebag, assumes that birth control pills indicate promiscuity. And while in my case it’s far from it (I’m quite the prude, much to the chagrin of a lot of dudes who assume otherwise), there’s nothing wrong with being sexually active if the partners involved are consensual, of age, and responsible. No one’s sex life is anyone’s business, and assuming things about someone’s sex life based on whether or not she pops birth control pills is just plain stupid. Oral contraceptives serve a bunch of health purposes, and they’re nothing to be ashamed of. It’s just one example of how slut shaming can actually affect your health.

Plus, I always figured illegitimate grandchildren would embarrass her a lot more.

Have you ever been ashamed of taking birth control? Do you have a hard time talking about birth control with your parents, even if it’s for health reasons? Tell us in the comments!

Girls take birth control for a LOT of reasons other than sex!

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