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The book description explains, “With dozens of ways to take action, Sexy Feminism explains how feminism helps women get what they want (and does not, contrary to many reports, ruin anyone’s chances at love, success, sex, beauty, or style). It guides young women toward finding their own brand of feminism and using it to improve their lives and the world.”

That all sounds fine and dandy, but Bitch Magazine seems to have a different opinion: “The concept of “sexy” remains ill-defined and questionably applied throughout the book.”

Bitch Magazine also points out, “In chapter one, Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor and acclaimed journalist Christiane Amanpour are featured on a list of sexy feminists. Not a regular list of feminists. Not a list of strong or powerful or admirable women. A list of sexy feminists.”

I get that this book is trying to make sexy an empowering identifier, but putting women on a list and labeling them as “Sexy _____” it just feels off. It seems that using sexy to describe a successful and admirable woman automatically takes the focus off her achievements and puts it on her looks.

The book also says things like this: “Sexy doesn’t have to be slutty….Don’t forget that fashion is a way to show the world who you feel you really are, but you don’t necessarily have to show all of you.” FACEPALM. Ugh. You can wear whatever you want, whenever you want. Showing skin does not make you slutty. Hooking up with people does not make you slutty. Let’s just stop using the word slutty, okay?

I think the big picture of this book makes sense. I also want women to stop being afraid of feminism. I don’t want women to think that being a feminist means you have to stop wearing makeup and heels because that is so not the case. The book is really asking can you be sexy AND a feminist?

Yes! Of course! You can be anything AND a feminist. You can want guys to open doors for you AND be a feminist. You can wear all pink AND be a feminist. The point of being a feminist is to support equal rights. And if you want to be sexy while doing so, then by all means, go ahead!
 
What do you think? Can you be sexy and a feminist? Are you a feminist? Tell us in the comments!
 

You can still say “bitch” if you’re a feminist

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On the bright side, there are always people working to stop bullying. The Friend Movement is an anti-bullying movement founded by Ronnie Kroell and Elliot London that was “created to help show positive anti-bully images through art and media.”

The Friend Movement has a new campaign called The New F Word, which is “a grass roots photo campaign and documentary film that aims to encourage the use of the word FRIEND to project inner strength and confidence.”

They’re asking people to basically flip off bullying and empower themselves instead. According to their website, “When a person is called a FREAK they shut down inside, letting the bullying continue. We want the individual to have an empowered inner monologue of ‘F U, I am actually really FABULOUS and do not need your approval.’”

The New F Word campaign asks participants to take out words like “fatty, faggot, freak” and replace it with “friend.” They’re using a photo campaign to promote the campaign and are aiming to take over 10,000 photos in three months across the country. They have celebrities like Adam Lambert, Leanne Rimes and Darren Criss involved and are throwing a benefit concert scheduled for July 1.

The Friend Movement also has Lizzie Velasquez in their corner, who is a major anti-bullying advocate. You can watch Lizzie’s story in this clip from Entertainment Tonight.

 

I encourage all of you to sign up on The Friend Movement’s page to get more info about the campaign and see if you can make it to their shoots. I love the idea of taking something negative and turning it into something positive because in doing so, you take the power away from the negativity.

So next time someone calls you fat or calls you a freak, remember how fabulous you are instead!
 
Have you heard of The Friend Movement? What do you think about The New F Word campaign? Will you join the movement? Tell us in the comments!
 

Do other girls hate you for having sex?

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Chelsea said in her caption, “Two of my best friends won Cutest Couple of our senior class. First time in my school history a same sex couple has even been able to run for this category, not to mention winning it. So proud of them, and my school.”

The fact that they won the first time a same sex couple could run speaks volumes about this school. And what did Brad and Dylan have to say about the whole thing?

The cutest couple told The Huffington Post, “This whole thing has been a bit surreal for us because we have been raised to believe that love is love. We never realized that our happiness and openness would inspire so many individuals. The support we have received from our family, friends, and even strangers has led us to believe that our affection for each other is normal … When we started dating a year [ago], the thought of a photo of us traveling throughout the world would be a bit frightening, but now we are proud to be part of the LGBT community.”

This is just so precious. I’m so proud of this school and this couple for not giving a rat’s butt about what anyone thinks and letting people be people regardless of their sexual orientation. These two guys are just the best.

While I wish that these kinds of stories would be so normal by now, we’re not quite there yet. And that really sucks. But I am so happy that there are couples like Brad and Dylan who will hopefully inspire other schools to follow suit. And they’re so right: love is love. That’s it.

Do you love this photo or what? Are same sex couples allowed to run for these superlatives at your school? Tell us in the comments!
 

Sadly, Kaitlyn Hunt is facing a lawsuit for her relationship with her girlfriend

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According to Daily Mail, “Research suggests that taking the contraceptive pill makes women less competitive with each other, meaning they are less likely to fight to keep their ideal man.” Um. What? I don’t even. Okay, science.

Apparently, The University of Groningen in the Netherlands surveyed women between 20 and 31 by asking questions about intra-sexual competition. So basically they asked if they were threatened by other women or not. They found that “women in a relationship were less competitive when they were on the Pill, making them less likely to fight to keep their partner if another woman comes along to turn his head.”

They believe that this is because the pill suppresses testosterone, which encourages rivalry. Fertility expert Dr. Allan Pacey from Sheffield University says, “I don’t think there’s sufficient evidence for doctors to start issuing a health warning to women,” and thinks the study needs more research.

I don’t think there needs to be more time wasted on this research. Maybe it’s just me, but I was probably more competitive when I was on the pill. And in my relationships I wasn’t just like “Oh well, this guy will do.” Not to mention, if another woman came around “to turn his head,” I would definitely fight to keep my man.

Am I totally outside the norm on this one? Are women on the pill just giving up their boyfriends because he looks at someone else? Are women just getting married to some guy because they’re not fighting for what they really want?

I don’t think this study really has any scientific basis. Obviously, everyone reacts differently to birth control. And there are so many different types of birth control pills so really, I think it’s impossible to make a sweeping generalization.

Do you think birth control makes you less competitive with other women? Do you think it makes you settle? Tell us in the comments!
 

Are your birth control pills giving you pain during orgasms?

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Well, it worked! Facebook made a public statement yesterday evening:

“In light of this recent attention, we want to take this opportunity to explain our philosophy and policies regarding controversial or harmful content, including hate speech, and to explain some of the steps we are taking to reduce the proliferation of content that could create an unsafe environment for users.

As a result, we believe we are able to remove the vast majority of content that violates our standards, even as we scale those systems to cover our more than 1 billion users, and even as we seek to protect users from those who seek to circumvent our guidelines by reposting content that has been taken down time and time again.”

The statement goes on to explain that Facebook will update their guidelines when it comes to permitted content as well as the guidelines their team uses to evaluate reported content. They will also update the training that their teams go through so they can better recognize inappropriate content. In addition, they will do more to make those who post such content accountable for their actions.

Essentially, Facebook will “refine its approach to hate speech,” and they invited WAM!, The Everyday Sexism Project and other supporters to work with them and create a better environment. Facebook also stated, “We’ll also continue to expand our outreach to responsible groups and experts who can help and support us in our efforts to give people the power to share and make the world more open and connected.”

Honestly, it’s upsetting that it had to take a week-long campaign, over 60,000 tweets, and thousands of emails and petition signatures in order for Facebook to even recognize that there was an issue. But it goes to show the power of social media and how if a community makes enough noise, a change can be made.

I wish I could say that I think we’ll never see horrible groups and photos on Facebook again, but I think this is a start. Facebook recognized an issue that really hurt their users, and they want to fix it. It’s a great step in the right direction!

How do you feel about how Facebook handled the situation? Do you think their policies will be better from now on? Tell us in the comments!
 

In other creepy social media news, Snapchat photos are getting leaked

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Basically, Snapchatleaked allows users to upload screenshots of Snapchat photos or recovered photos. The idea behind Snapchat is that you can safely send photos to friends that are deleted after a maximum of ten seconds. When someone tries to screenshot your Snapchat, it alerts you who did it so you can avoid sending them photos in the future.

This whole situation brings into question the security factor of Snapchat. Alerting a person that someone took a screenshot of their picture doesn’t really do anything. They don’t get kicked off Snapchat or warned or anything. And your photos aren’t actually deleted after they disappear as this security firm discovered.

In just 24-hours, the Snapchatleaked Facebook page had gotten over 500,000 “likes” but was shut down because it violated Facebook’s terms and conditions. A spokesperson for Snapchatleaked told Metro that “All images are user submitted, if the person asks to take them down we do. Most see it as fun and getting ‘Facebook famous’.” However, even though the screenshots are user submitted, it doesn’t mean that the subject of the photos gave permission, which is a big deal.

This is exactly why I’ve been wary of Snapchat from the beginning. They say the pictures get deleted, but they don’t. The ability to screenshot photos shouldn’t be an option if this is supposed to be a safe way to send pictures (nude or not) to friends.

Snapchat has not responded to comment, but I certainly hope this gets them to reconsider their policies.

What do you think about this new website? Are you worried about your Snapchats getting leaked? Tell us in the comments!
 

And while we’re at it, Facebook needs to review their policies as well

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Some examples of these horrible pages include, “Join if you think all sluts need a good kick in the guts haha!!!!!!” and “Violently Raping Your Friend Just for Laughs,” and others that I can’t even repeat.

WAM’s official page states that “Facebook has long allowed content endorsing violence against women. They claim that these pages fall under the ‘humor’ part of their guidelines, or are expressions of ‘free speech.’ But Facebook has proven willing to crack down on other forms of hate speech, including anti-Semitic, Islamophobic and homophobic speech, without claiming such exemptions.”

WAM wrote an open letter to Facebook and is asking companies to remove their advertisements from the site until Facebook agrees to remove such content.

The movement is hoping to achieve three things:

“1. Recognize speech that trivializes or glorifies violence against girls and women as hate speech and make a commitment that you will not tolerate this content.

2. Effectively train moderators to recognize and remove gender-based hate speech.

3. Effectively train moderators to understand how online harassment differently affects women and men, in part due to the real-world pandemic of violence against women.”

WAM! hopes that by getting advertisers to pull their ads, Facebook will actually make a change. Currently, several companies have pulled their ads while others claim they are working privately with Facebook to resolve the issue. WAM! is asking those in support of the movement to reach out to these companies and ask for their help, which seems to be working.

According to the Daily Mail, a spokesperson for Facebook said “Facebook’s policy is that removing all offensive content or controversial humor from its site is not the solution to combating ignorance. Having the freedom to debate serious issues like this is how we fight prejudice. Facebook looks to give people the freedom to describe, depict and comment on the world in which we live.”

Facebook is claiming freedom of speech, but freedom of speech does not protect obscenity, which these groups fall into.

WAM! posted an update today on Twitter:

A WEEK!#fbrape was launched a week ago. In that time we’ve had 15 companies pull from FB, 106 sign the open letter, & over 57,000 tweets!

— WAM! (@womenactmedia) May 28, 2013

I think this is so huge that companies are actually listening. I knew that there were some offensive pages floating around on Facebook, but I had no idea there were so many. It’s frankly quite disgusting that they exist. I’m all for freedom of speech, but I’m for freedom of protected speech. The idea that there are people out there in support of rape or domestic violence, or any violence, makes me sick.

Laura Bates from Everyday Sexism stated, “What is needed is for Facebook to change its policy on representations of rape and domestic violence not sporadically take down pages in response to media pressure while their policies mean such content could be reposted in the future.” The #FBRape movement has posted a petition on Change.org that hopefully will get enough signatures to make a more permanent solution.

What do you think about the #FBRape movement? Do you think Facebook should remove these pages? Tell us in the comments!
 

Facebook is quickly losing popularity among teens

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Time for celebrity news. This week celebs are showing their true colors!

In today’s video, Hayley discusses Amanda Bynes’ arrest from last night. Oh, Amanda! Also, Hayley gives us the latest on Taylor Swift’s beef with Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez’s rekindled friendship. Do you think that TSwift is being a bad friend? And in case you’ve lost faith in humanity, Carrie Underwood donates a hefty sum to the Red Cross in response to Oklahoma’s recent tornadoes.

Watch the video now to get caught up on celebrity news and gossip. And stay tuned for another new episode of What’s Up With Hayley on Monday!

Hayley Tries A Homemade Body Scrub Recipe For Smooth Legs.

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It’s complete and utter chaos, and I’m sitting here trying to control my anxiety over the images. I want you to know that it’s totally okay to feel scared and anxious when you see things like this, whether you’ve experienced a natural disaster or not.

Two years ago, I was in the April 27 tornado disaster in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. I remember sitting in the bathroom with my roommate watching the weather. Suddenly, they showed a picture of the massive EF-4 tornado in Tuscaloosa. And then our power went out. I remember slamming the bathroom door shut and diving into the bathtub. It sounded like a freight train.

After it was over, we walked out to see sawdust and glass and pure terror. What used to be tall trees and houses across the street was now completely leveled. We ran up to the top of our parking deck to assess what had just happened, but there was nothing left. Our town was destroyed.

Eventually, the city told students to leave. The cleanup crews and professionals needed us to leave because it was dangerous for us. No one wanted to leave Tuscaloosa in shambles, but we had to. I spent the entire summer in post-traumatic stress therapy. I cried at the sight of a cloud and panicked any time it started to rain.

Seeing the images from what happened in Oklahoma is breaking my heart because I know exactly how they’re feeling. I didn’t sleep last night because I was reliving April 27. I feel scared and very anxious today, and I probably will for a few days.

In therapy, I learned that dealing with this kind of anxiety is a little different. When you try to process natural disasters, you have trouble understanding that it was out of your control. There is nothing you could have done to prevent it.

My therapist prescribed me puzzle and word games. Seriously. Anytime there’s a storm, I play some Scrabble on my phone or do a word search. Games that work your brain help take your mind off whatever’s going on because you have to focus.

Even if you’re nowhere near Oklahoma, it’s okay to be afraid and worried. It’s normal to feel scared after a natural disaster, and one of the best things you can do is to be aware and prepared. Take tornado watches and warnings seriously. If your city tells you to evacuate or get into a safe location, do it. Weather is no joke. Friends of mine joke that I’m paranoid, but I’d rather be paranoid instead of anything else.

I’m feeling quite helpless with Oklahoma that I can’t be there like I was in Tuscaloosa to help clean up and just do something. But we can still help from a distance. If you want to help, you have some options.

- Donate blood or money through the Red Cross

- Donate to Salvation Army or Oklahoma Disaster Relief

- Contact your local charities to see if they’re accepting donations of clothes and supplies, which they’ll transport for you

- Hold your own supply drive to collect everything from clothes to toiletries

Honestly, from someone who’s been there, any little bit helps. We had people from all over sending shipments of food, clothing, water, you name it.
 
Has the Oklahoma tornado affected you in any way? Are you anxious or scared? Tell us in the comments!
 

How to deal with disturbing images online

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Kaitlyn and the girl started their relationship at the beginning of the school year, and they played on the school’s basketball team together. Kaitlyn’s mom says the girl’s parents knew about the relationship.

But suddenly, Kaitlyn was dropped from the basketball team. Then in February she was arrested and faced with a petition for expulsion because of her relationship.

The petition didn’t work at first, but Kaitlyn’s mother stated in a Facebook post, “After two separate judges ruled that Kaitlyn could finish her senior year with her peers, her girlfriend’s parents appealed to the Indian River County School Board, who expelled Kaitlyn sent her to the alternative school.”

Kaitlyn is currently facing 15 years in jail and would have to register as a sex offender, but she has been offered a plea deal of two years of house arrest and a year probation. Kaitlyn’s mother is working to get the charges dropped completely. She’s even set up a petition to stop the prosecution.

Kaitlyn’s mom believes that this whole ordeal is because the girlfriend’s parents don’t approve of their daughter being gay and that they’re using Kaitlyn as a scapegoat, essentially. It makes my heart so sad that Kaitlyn is being faced with such serious offenses because she had a younger girlfriend, who according to her mother, consented to everything: “Kaitlyn’s girlfriend denies that Kaitlyn ever pressured her and is adamant that their relationship is entirely consensual.”

This is a sad, sad example of homophobia in one of its worst forms. But age of consent is a serious thing. The age of consent in Florida is 18, which Kaitlyn’s younger girlfriend is not even close to. However, I honestly think that if Kaitlyn were a guy, she wouldn’t be facing these charges. I think the parents wouldn’t have even blinked that their daughter was dating an older boy.

I feel like age of consent is thought of as just something to keep teenagers from having sex, but it’s actually a really big deal and this case proves as much. I have to wonder though if the age of consent was even discussed between these girls. I know when I was a teen, I didn’t know what the age of consent was in my state. Fortunately, I fell within the age of consent when I did have sex. But what if I didn’t? My parents could have had my older boyfriend arrested!

I personally hope that Kaitlyn gets through this, but do me a favor and find out what the age of consent is in your state just to protect yourself and your partner from unwanted legal issues.
 
What do you think about this lawsuit? Do you think it’s fair? Do you think Kaitlyn did anything wrong? Tell us in the comments!
 

Are these girls encouraging pregnancy?

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