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Yesterday it was reported that 15-year-old Paris Jackson, daughter of Michael Jackson, was hospitalized for attempting to commit suicide. It’s so sad and horrible to see such a young girl going through something so tough. I think this kind of situation always brings up questions such as: how do you deal when a friend or a boyfriend/girlfriend is suicidal? Imagine if your significant other felt the way Paris does – what would you do?

Well, I know what I would do, because I already went through this. A few years ago, I dated a guy who was suicidal. It was scary, very upsetting and really confusing. I know I’m not the only one who has gone through something like this, so I wanted to share my story with you guys so you can see that, if this happens to you, you’re not alone.

I dated my ex, let’s call him C, for almost five years and the entire time we knew each other, he was suicidal and very depressed. I knew this about him before we started dating, yet I went into the relationship anyway thinking that I could help him get better. I was wrong.

Things didn’t start out badly. It wasn’t until our first big fight that I really saw how many problems C had. He did something that really hurt my feelings and we were having a huge argument over the phone late at night. It was just a regular bad fight until I threatened to break up with him - that’s when C lost it. His voice changed completely and became very emotionless and monotone. He said something like, “Go ahead, break up with me. It’s just another reason for me to kill myself.”

Obviously, I freaked out and started panicking. I was 15-years-old and my first love was telling me all about how much he wanted to his end his life. He told me he was in the bathroom with a razor blade and he could end things right then and there. I was terrified and crying hysterically. I promised him I wouldn’t break up with him, but it didn’t seem to matter – he just kept going on about how miserable he was. Finally, I woke my mom up to talk to him and calm him down because I was so scared that he was going to do something. It was a horrible experience.

The next morning, C acted like nothing had happened, even though I was still shaken. When I brought it up, he brushed it off like it was no big deal. He seemed fine, so I let it go. Maybe he was just upset from the fight? Except I was wrong. That sort of thing started happening more and more, until it was to the point where I couldn’t say anything to C without him threatening to kill himself. While some may call this a manipulation tactic, I know that C genuinely had depression issues he needed to work out – so while I was aware that he was manipulating and controlling me by making me feel guilty, I also felt like I couldn’t take the chance of not taking him seriously. Imagine if he went through with it? I would never be able to forgive myself.

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After a few years of this, I had fully committed myself to keeping C happy at all times. Except it didn’t work. These suicidal episodes got worse and worse. A few times, I caught him with cuts on his arms. Twice, I called his house in a panic to tell his mom I was worried about him (only twice because she didn’t listen to me). I begged him to go to therapy, but he refused. It didn’t matter what happened, whether he did something wrong or I did – he always turned a fight around to make me end up feeling sorry for him.

Of course, all of this took a toll on me. I went from a happy-go-lucky teenager to someone who was constantly stressed out and scared. I was also miserable because C brought me down. It’s hard to be happy when you’re constantly with someone who is severely depressed and it’s impossible to live your own life when it becomes centered around keeping one person happy. I didn’t do things for myself – I did things to keep C from thinking about suicide.

When I was finally able to pull myself away from our relationship, things got worse. C started seriously cutting himself, overdosing on prescription pills and using other illegal substances to not only numb his pain, but also to get my attention. But I had finally come to the point where I realized that I needed to start focusing on myself. I had finally realized that my life could not revolve around making C happy because C had to make himself happy. It sounds selfish, but I had to turn my back on C. I loved him and cared about him so much, but he was controlling every aspect of my life.

It wasn’t for years afterwards that I realized that if C had killed himself, it wouldn’t have been my fault. He had (has) serious depression issues and I, as a teenager trying to figure out my own emotions, was not equipped to handle them. I think that’s the most important thing I learned from this entire situation: it’s not your fault. If your boyfriend or girlfriend is this depressed and wants to commit suicide, it’s not your fault. You can’t handle it on your own. You need to get outside help for this person, or they need to get it themselves. I tried to take on C’s issues on my own and felt like I had failed when I couldn’t make him happy. I see other girls go through the same thing and I just want to hug them and tell them they need to take a step back.

So, what do you do if your boyfriend or girlfriend is suicidal? Get them help if you can. Be there for them if they need to talk. Show them that you love and care about them. But don’t make it your own personal mission to help them get better. In cases like these, serious help is needed. When C would tell me he was suicidal and I would cry and beg him not to do it, it didn’t make things better – in fact, I think it made things worse. Just remember: you can help up until a certain point and then it’s up to them.

Have you ever dealt with a suicidal boyfriend or girlfriend or friend? What did you do? Have you ever been in my situation? Tell me in the comments.

Is talking about yourself a sign of depression?

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Depression and anxiety may prompt you to talk about yourself–or vice versa. | Source: ShutterStock

Depression and anxiety suck, but it’s got another surprising correlation: talking about yourself. Apparently people who are into “me, myself and I” above asking about anyone else’s day are more prone to full-on bouts of depression and anxiety.

Scientists conducted a study and it showed people who use singular first person pronouns the most–meaning “I,” “me,” “myself”–tended to be more anxious and depressed than people who used plural pronouns like “we” or “us.”

Not only were the “me, myself and I” people more likely to suffer depression and anxiety, but they also had more trouble in interpersonal relationships than people who said “us” and “we.”

One expert explained, “Using first-person singular pronouns highlights the self as a distinct entity whereas, using first-person plural pronouns emphasize [being part of] social relationships.” Translation? People who say “me,” “myself” and “I” are less likely to have or to associate themselves with social situations with other people.

Experts also say that people who use the words “I,” “me” and “myself” are needier and try harder to seek attention than their peers who approach things more socially or in groups.

However, it’s unclear whether one causes the other or if it’s sort of cyclical. People with depression or anxiety may need more attention than their peers without those disorders, and they may feel more lonely and isolated as a result of suffering from anxiety and depression to begin with. If someone’s lonely, chances are interpersonal relationships aren’t the easiest thing in the world for them, so it’s important to take this study with a grain of salt. There are times in life when everyone talks about themselves more often than usual. And just because you or a pal use “I” instead of “we” doesn’t mean you have a mental illness–and just because you have a mental illness, it doesn’t mean you’re self-absorbed!

Do you think talking about yourself is a sign of depression or anxiety? Do you think people who suffer from anxiety or depression are more likely to talk about themselves? Have you ever suffered from anxiety or depression? Tell us in the comments!

Is depression contagious!?

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Have you ever heard the saying, “misery loves company?” That statement has unfortunately been proven true more than a few times – think about how difficult it is to be cheery and happy in a room full of sad people. So then the question becomes, is depression contagious? According to a new study, the answer to that is yes.

Researchers recently looked a group of college students and discovered that you actually can catch depression from others who are already depressed. They found that friends most likely “caught” depression from others six months later on.

But don’t freak out: this doesn’t mean that hanging with your depressed bestie means you’ll automatically find yourself depressed a few months later. There are a lot of factors to consider when it comes to “catching” depression.

For one thing, it’s important to know that some people are simply more prone to being depressed than other people. This can be called cognitive vulnerability and it refers to people who respond negatively to stressful life events. It’s a really strong risk factor for depression.

Genetics also play a part in depression – those with a family history of it are more likely to suffer from it at some point in their lives. Other causes of depression include certain medications, a history of abuse, illness or other personal problems. The point is, there are a lot of causes and triggers of depression, so it can be difficult to pinpoint exactly how it happens. That means it’s really hard to say someone got depressed simply because they spent a lot of time with another depressed person. You know what I mean?

Another important thing to consider with this study is that researchers looked at students who lived together as roommates in college. Think about it: college roommates usually spend a ton of time together because, um, they live together! They share a very small space and so it’s difficult to really separate yourself from that person. Of course some of their habits and thinking are going rub off on each other. It sort of makes sense that researchers found that people assigned to roommates with depression caught onto that type of thinking.

The good news? Researchers also found that students with cognitive vulnerability assigned to roommates who didn’t have cognitive vulnerability actually experienced a decrease in their negative thinking. That means that while it can be possible to catch depression, it can also be possible to catch positive thinking and happier feelings.

The other piece of good news that comes from this is that it may help researchers find new ways to treat people suffering from depression. One of the doctors working on the case pointed out that “alerting a person’s environment could be used as part of a treatment for depression.”

If you’re suffering from depression and want to find help, the best thing for you to do is to seek professional help. Talking to a therapist might sound scary, but it can be really helpful for some people. Talking things out with family members and friends may be helpful also, but they can’t always give you the full attention you may need.

And if you feel like you’re especially prone to depression, this information doesn’t mean you need to stay away from depressed people altogether. However, I wouldn’t spend all of my time with those who are constantly miserable and continuously bring you down. If you feel like someone is a trigger to your depression, it may be in your best interest to spend less times with them. At the same time, it might be beneficial for you to hang with people who are happy and positive a lot of the time. That might help to lift your mood.

Do you suffer from depression? Do you think depression is catching? Have you ever felt sad after being with someone who was depressed? Tell us in the comments.

What is anxiety and how do I deal with it?

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We all know what a crisis hotline is – it’s a number that you can call if you need professional help and don’t know where else to go. Usually people call crisis hotlines when they’re feeling depressed or when they’re dealing with substance abuse issues, rape, abuse or other awful things like that. These numbers can be really useful and can really give people help when it’s needed.

But there’s one big problem: since text messaging and social media took over our worlds, actual phone calls have sort of fallen over to the side. Think about it – when was the last time you called someone rather than texted? Or Facebook messaged? Or tweeted? Phone calls just aren’t as popular as they used to be, and crisis hotlines have actually seen a pretty big decline in use. The good news? DoSomething.org is trying to change that.

The CEO of DoSomething.org, Nancy Lublin, is trying to establish a text number for teens to text in their problems instead of calling. She came up with the idea because the organization gets so many text messages from teens asking for help – the problem is, it’s not a hotline, so they haven’t been able to really reach out.

Nancy will launch the Crisis Text Line in August (New York based) so that teens have a specific number they can text (rather than call) when they feel like they need help. Once a text comes in, the person who texted will be directed towards other partner organizations that will be able to help. So if they’re texting about bullying issues due to being gay, bisexual or lesbian, they’ll be directed to The Trevor Project – or if they’re calling about eating disorders, they’ll be directed to an organization that helps with that specific issues.

How is this revolutionary? Well, while there are some other text message hotlines out there, there aren’t a ton. Also, text messages seems to be the way to go these days. As one researcher points out, “Phone calls are not the way young people express themselves.”

Text messages just seem to make sense. Not only is this the way a lot of us communicate, but it’s also just more convenient. When you want to talk about a private issue, would you rather text it or talk about it out loud where someone could hear you? Texting in your problem ensures that no one will overhear you discussing it and makes things quicker and easier. Other organizations who have started relying on text message hotlines have found much more success.

I think this is a really cool idea. I love that organizations like this are making it so easy for people to find someone to help them. Sometimes when we’re really depressed or dealing with something really heavy, we don’t know who to turn to. The Crisis Text Line would make it so much easier for us all to get in touch with professionals who can give us the help we need. And who doesn’t want that?

Would you ever use a crisis hotline? Would you rather text or make a phone call, for this and in general? Tell us in the comments.

What do you do if you think a friend has an eating disorder?

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Feeling lonely can make you sick! Beat loneliness to feel better inside and out. | Source: Shutterstock

Can being lonely actually make you sick? A new study says yes. Dude, that’s so sad!

Here’s the thing though–being lonely can also be in your head. The study focused on people who feel lonely despite those who actually have few friends and loved ones. The research showed that lonely people actually had weaker immune systems than their counterparts who felt loved and wanted, and that those who were feeling lonely often suffered more from sudden stress than people who felt fine otherwise.

It’s widely known that stress negatively impacts your physical health, so when combined with the weaker immune systems of those who feel lonely often, feeling bummed out and unloved really can make you sick.

Docs think it’s because feeling lonely adds more stress to your life–and chances are stress is part of why you feel lonely in the first place, so it becomes a vicious and heartwrenching cycle of crappy feelings, both physical and emotional.

That said, no one likes feeling lonely and down. What can you do to snap out of loneliness? We have some ideas, cute girl!

Go for a walk.
Simply being outside can boost your mood and the workout you get will release endorphins that make you happy. You can zone out to your favorite songs on your iPod if you want, but if you want to stop feeling lonely, it may be good to keep the earbuds in your pocket and smile or wave at a stranger. A simple “hello” can make not only their day, but also yours.

Primp.
Sometimes when you feel lonely, all you want to do is throw on pajamas and sulk, right? But! You’re more likely to reach out to others when you know you look cute. So put on your shimmery lip gloss or favorite mascara and maybe spend a little time doing your hair just the way you love it. It sounds shallow, but a lot of times how you feel on the inside is reflected in the image you put out to the world. Send them a message that says, “Hey! I’m worth getting to know. Seriously, look at how adorable I am. Resistance is futile.”

Give out those compliments! | Source: ShutterStock

Give out compliments like they’re candy.
Pretend everyone you see is a trick or treater on Halloween and you just ran out of Snickers. How do you compensate? “You have gorgeous eyes!” “Your art project was awesome.” “That shirt is adorable.” “Cute shoes!” “I loved your presentation in history class.” These will all go a long way to making someone else happy, which will in turn improve your own mood–especially because everyone lucky enough to talk to you may repay you with a sweet word of praise too.

But resist too much actual candy if you can.
It pains me to say this because holy Hell, do I love junk food! But it’s true. A sugar rush can feel good in the moment if you’re lonely, but too much sweets or salt can make you feel bloated, tired and gross after a while, and if you’re eating all comfort foods, your bod may not have the vitamins it needs to fight infections off–and thus, your loneliness can make you sick. A little treat goes a long way–savor it, don’t scarf it!

Hop off of Facebook and talk to friends in person.
Social networking can turn even the best of us into jealous beasts, especially when you’re already feeling lonely to begin with. Instead of lurking everyone’s pages and refreshing your newsfeed to see how much fun everyone else is having, call your BFF to meet for macchiatos and unplug for an hour.

What do you do when you feel lonely? Have you ever felt lonely to the point where you felt physically sick? Do you think feeling lonely can really make you sick? Tell us in the comments!

Here are some amazing tips to stop feeling lonely and be more outgoing–from you guys!

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There’s nothing worse than having a day, or a few days, where you feel totally down in the dumps. When you’re super bummed out, all you want to do is crawl under the blankets in your bed and sleep until you wake up in a better, more cheerful mood. But wait! Before you do that, science has helpfully given us two tips on how to be a little bit happier.

One super easy way to put a smile on your face? Researchers say that eating fruit and vegetables every day can make people feel “calmer, happier and more energetic.” Wipe that look of disgust off your face! Fruits and veggies can be yummy, they’re good for you and they can lift your spirits. What more could you want?

Quick side note: This doesn’t exactly mean that eating an apple will produce happy results immediately. The study found that eating seven to eight servings of fruits and veggies each day will produce a positive change. So basically, this is something you kind of need to keep up with.

If you’re reading this, shaking your head and thinking, “A piece of chocolate cake would make me much happier than a bowl of fruit”, I get it. But… you’re probably sort of wrong. The immediate gratification you get from a bunch of cake might be awesome and full of happy thoughts, but there are actually a bunch of studies that prove that too much sugar can actually cause slight depression. Eek! Those sweet tooth comfort foods might not be as comforting as we thought.

The other tip? Try reading a self-help book. I know that might seem super embarrassing – when I was in high school and going through my emo phase (not pretty), my mom bought me a stack of self-help books on dealing with depression. I was mortified that my friends would see them and think I was a weirdo, so I stashed them under my bed and never looked at them again. It was silly – there’s nothing to be ashamed of!

If you’re feeling doubtful about this, there’s proof that self-help books work. A new study shows that reading self-help books can help fight depression and prevent it from creeping back into your life. I have to agree. When I broke up with my first boyfriend, I was miserable… so I started reading the book It’s Called A Breakup Because It’s Broken, by the same people who wrote He’s Just Not That Into You. Guys, it changed my life. Seriously. If you’re sad about a breakup, read it.

So, keep these two tips in mind for the next time you’re feeling particularly sad. And if they help… report back to me. I want to know!

Are you going to try either of these tips? Have you ever read a self-help book? What’s your tip for feeling happier every day? Tell us in the comments!

How hugging can save your life

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This was me, just nervous about everything. Source: Shutterstock

Of course, 9/11 was a traumatic day for all of us. I grew up in Atlanta, Georgia but my entire family is from New York. I had visited and knew exactly what the World Trade Center was while most of my classmates did not. My family was very affected by 9/11. My dad used to travel every few weeks to work there, and he easily could have been there that day. He lost countless friends and co-workers. My cousins went to school in the city at the time. My second-cousin Kevin Donnelly, a lieutenant in FDNY Ladder Company 3, was a first responder. He didn’t make it out.

Being 11 and trying to understand that event and fearing for the lives of my family members really shook me up. We flew to New York not too long after for Kevin’s memorial service, which is the first time I experienced real anxiety. I saw the National Guard at the airport with huge guns and felt panicky. I was so nervous to even get on a plane, and I was a child who absolutely loved flying. I don’t think my parents really thought anything of it. I wasn’t having a full-blown panic attack and they probably couldn’t tell what was going on. But, it was the beginning of my struggle with anxiety.

I would get overly anxious about things that other teens would just be a little nervous about, like taking tests, taking pills and storms. It was such a problem that I stopped having fun and doing what I loved. I didn’t get help my junior year of college, when a tornado hit my college town. After that, my anxiety was at an all time high and I just wasn’t able to live my life or be myself.

This was me for like four years. Source: flowintothecity

I had been to therapists before for various things, but I never went for anxiety. No one had ever talked to me about it so I didn’t know that’s what I was dealing with. I know people with anxiety, but everyone else’s is so different than mine. I never realized that what I was dealing with was classified as anxiety too.

So while I was in post-traumatic stress disorder therapy, I started to make connections back to things that happened to me. Everything made so much more sense, and I began to learn ways to handle my anxiety. Given that taking medicine is one of my triggers for anxiety, I didn’t want to take any prescriptions to help me deal with my anxiety issues. I know going on an anti-anxiety medication would help me a lot, but that in itself makes me panic. So my therapist taught me ways to work around it.

Part of dealing with anxiety is finding things that work specifically for you. It’s a lot of trial and error. I do a lot of breathing exercises and meditation. My therapist suggested brain-stimulating apps for me, so I play puzzle or word games on my phone. I also do certain ritual-type behaviors, which points to my OCD tendencies (another issue entirely), but I listen to the same music every morning when I get ready and when I go to and from work. Being on a crowded subway and stuck underground makes me super anxious, so I have to keep some sense of normalcy to calm me down.

For a long time, I let my anxiety control me. Now, I control it instead, and it’s made such a difference. I stopped allowing myself to be afraid to do things so I went out more, I did activities I wanted to do. Certainly, it takes a lot to break down that wall, but once I did I felt so much better.

Now when I say “I’m fine” I really mean it Source: lifeasaquirkygirl

I definitely still experience anxiety and panic, but I manage because I have techniques to deal with it. I watch myself carefully too because I know that with age, my anxiety will change and might get worse. I’ll likely have to medicate at some point, but for right now I’m doing just fine without it.

If you’re struggling with anxiety, or you feel nervous and you’re not sure why, I encourage you to talk to someone about it. Mental health has such a stigma, so everyone’s scared to bring it up. You’re not crazy or weird for having anxiety. It’s a lot more common than you probably think, so don’t be afraid to discuss it. The sooner you start talking about it, the sooner you can get help and be on your way to enjoying stuff!

Do you struggle with anxiety? Have you talked to anyone about it? Do you think you have anxiety but aren’t sure? Tell me in the comments!

Naps are actually really beneficial

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The effects of diet soda and other diet drinks have been debated–and now depression might be one of them! | Source: ShutterStock

There are some awesome effects of diet soda: You can enjoy the sweetness and bubbles of something delish without packing on the calories, which is a big incentive. Diabetics can enjoy soda without affecting their blood sugar, which lessens the feeling of missing out. Sounds pretty win-win, right?

Well, it might not be. There have been lots of reports about negative effects of diet soda that have had questionable results and findings–no one’s really sure if it causes cancer (so far, you’d have to drink a whole lot for a really, really long time to show any changes–and they’ve only studied mice, so take it with an enormous grain of salt) or makes you gain weight by increasing cravings for sweets (what a cruel world!). Now, another possible effect of diet soda has emerged: It’s being linked to depression. Yikes!

New studies have found that people who drink four or more sodas of any kind every day were 30 percent more likely to suffer from depression that people who didn’t drink as much soda at all. People who drank diet soda were 32 percent more likely to be depressed than people who didn’t drink soda daily, and diet soda drinkers were almost 10 percent more likely to have depression than people who drank regular soda. Phew, that’s a lot of numbers–got all that?

Good, because there’s more: Diet soda isn’t the only culprit. Apparently diet fruit drinks might bum people out, too. People who drank diet fruit drinks daily had a 51 percent higher chance of being depressed than people who didn’t.

We’re like, “But they’re so delicious! Say it ain’t so!”

Thankfully, it was just a link, not a direct cause. The researchers admit there are a ton of other factors that can affect your likelihood of depression: Your BMI, family history, stress, and just how your life is going in general.

There is, however, a drink that may stave off depression: Coffee. The same study showed that people who gulp down four or more cups of java a day were less likely to be depressed. That may be because caffeine acts as a brain stimulant–or just because it’s so yummy–but the jury is still out.

We’re not trying to make you panic and throw all your Diet Coke into a river. That would be terrible for the aquatic life. But maybe just don’t drink so much of any one thing all of the time, whether it’s diet soda, fruity diet drinks or regular stuff. Maybe those people were depressed because they didn’t get a ton of variety in their hydration. Seriously, the same thing all the time? Boring!

Do you buy all of the negative effects of diet soda and diet drinks, or do you think it’s just hype? Have you ever noticed what you eat or drink affecting your mood? Tell us in the comments!

Are you depressed or just sad?

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Christmas cookies: As if you needed a reason. | Source: ShutterStock

The holiday season means Christmas cookies are out in full force. They’re delicious, they’re pretty, and you probably don’t need to be told twice to munch on ‘em. But in case you feel guilty about noshing on Christmas cookies this year (which you shouldn’t–you look fine and they’re not around for very long), we have a slew of reasons why you should relax and enjoy them. Just make sure you brush and floss your teeth well, otherwise you may have an unwanted visit from the tooth fairy instead of from Santa.

1. Christmas cookies keep you from getting depressed. Seriously.
Dude, it’s science. A study reported that nixing sugar and fat has the same effect on your brain as going through drug withdrawal. When you suddenly stop eating delicious treats like Christmas cookies too suddenly, you can feel bummed out. So gorge to your heart’s content and just wean yourself off gradually by New Year’s. Problem solved!

2. If you don’t, you’ll make other people depressed.
Whoever baked those delicious Christmas cookies put blood, sweat, and tears into them. Or maybe not, because that would be gross. But they probably did use a lot of sugar, love, and effort. So if no one eats those cookies, they’re going to feel like they’ve failed. Do you want them to feel that way? No? Then eat a cookie. And then eat another cookie.

3. They’re a stress reliever.
Feel like you’re about to bite someone’s head off? Do it literally. But instead of your best friend, dad, teacher, boss, or anyone else, do it with a gingerbread man. There’s a lot less drama involved and legal ramifications are slim to none (as long as you didn’t steal said gingerbread man), and you just might feel better when you’re done.

4. You won’t have another chance until next year.
Christmas cookies are a gift in themselves. Sure, you can have Valentine’s day or St. Patrick’s or Halloween cookies, but chances are they don’t have the unique flavors Christmas cookies often do–think gingerbread, peppermint, or red velvet. So you’d be wise to enjoy them while you can!

5. Remember that next year may never come.
Hurry up! The Mayan apocalypse is coming in nine days! Don’t waste them!

Do you really need a reason to eat Christmas cookies? Do you think fatty foods can really cause depression? What’s your favorite holiday treat or dessert? Tell us in the comments!

What do your Christmas cards say about you?

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Source: ShutterStock

First, let me thank you for writing in – you’re certainly not alone, as I know of quite a few girls who have also grappled with how to bare their past traumas to others. It takes a lot of courage to share any story of abuse, loss, or self-harm—whether with a stranger or a loved one.

I think the decision to tell your boyfriend about your own history is really quite a personal one. Obviously such information doesn’t quite make for great first date conversation, but you should absolutely be able to share such deeper things with someone you know you can trust—especially because it likely now informs a large part of who you are. If you’re at a point in the relationship where you feel like giving him that backstory will help him get to know you better, and you can confide in him with confidence, then you should go for it.

On the other hand, you may feel that, since you’re much happier now, your scars represent a past struggle which isn’t as relevant to your life now. In that case, I don’t think you need to tell him about their origins merely because he suspects something.

Your question reminds me of a girl who wanted to know when to tell her boyfriend that she loves him. My answer to you is similar in that you should only tell your boyfriend about your past when you feel like you need to. Then, if he can’t handle the truth, you’ll simply know that he wasn’t right for you in the first place. But more than likely, if he’s as into you as he sounds, hearing about your past issues won’t cause him to run away – he’ll only feel glad and relieved that you’re so much better off now.

Good luck!
Ethan

Ethan Fixell is a writer and comedian from New York City best known as one half of comic “dating coach” duo Dave and Ethan. He is also the creator and editor of ActualConversation.com. For more on Ethan, visit EthanFixell.com…or call his mom, Robin.

Are you confused about a guy? Do you find yourself wondering, “What is he thinking?” Tell us everything in the comments! And if you have a question for Ethan, email him at askaguy@gurl.com!

Am I depressed… or just sad?

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