First off, girls and guys need to understand that you "discover" your feelings of sexual attraction, not just "decide" who you are attracted to, according to Elizabeth Schroeder, MSW, who is a human sexuality professor at Montclair State University, in NJ.

"The only way a person will know whether what she is doing is experimentation or part of realizing she is lesbian or bisexual is to experience it and reflect carefully on the feelings that come up as a result of the experience," says Schroeder.