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  you are here  >>> REACT > advice gURL > sucky emotions  
  related topics  >>>  being yourself  |  body image  |  sucky emotions    

 

I'm 13 but I look like a woman. I don't try to look grown up. I don't wear my stomach out or mini skirts; but every time I'm walking on the street I hear catcalls like, "Ay, how old are you?" or "How you doin'?" Seriously, I'm tired of it. Can somebody help me?



28 member responses

    
    Ignore them
    When you answer back you're giving in to what they want. Just ignore them because eventually they'll get tired of talking to themselves.
    --Posted by musicchild08
    06:56PM EST 08/08/07


    
    Catcall 101
    That happens to me a WHOLE lot. I've even had someone try to "flirt" with me when I was with my mom at Wal-mart! How you react depends on the situation. One time I was walking and this guy asked me all these questions. Finally, he said, "So how old are you?" and I said "young enough for you to go to jail". You just have to be good with comebacks.

Other times you just have to strut your most confident walk and keep it moving. And if they ask, "Hey how ya doin?", just quickly say "I'm good thanks" and again keep it moving. You'll learn how to handle it BELIEVE ME!
    --Posted by just_me45
    04:41PM EST 08/08/07


    
    Ignore them completely
    That happens to me all of the time, too! What I do is pretend that I can't hear them at all. They keep yelling, but I just sing a song in my head. I don't give them the satisfaction of thinking that they had any impact on what I'm doing.
    --Posted by lilangel7308
    05:09AM EST 08/08/07


    
    Tell them to stop
    Just tell the guy or guys to stop, and that you're a minor. Tell them that you know your rights, and that if they don't stop bothering you you WILL press sexual harrassment charges.
    --Posted by mj_sneaky06
    03:31AM EST 08/08/07


    
    Defy their expectations
    When these men hassle you, they expect you to stay mute, to shuffle off and to let them get away with it. They may also expect you to get angry and to lose control. You can defy their expectations by turning around, looking them in the eye, and asking in a loud, calm voice, "Why do you think it's okay to do that?" Or, "What do you expect to happen when you yell at a stranger across the street?" It will throw them off completely; they'll be uncomftorable for a change, not you.
    --Posted by squishylou
    09:08PM EST 08/07/07



    
    They're simply jerks
    Unfortunately, we can't avoid people being jerks and sending out crude catcalls. Do you notice it tends to be those who are in groups that do it? In many cases they're just trying to affirm their own sexuality, or to empower themselves by being predatory with their words.

If it's a group of strangers, all you can really do is ignore them. If a specific person is bothering you consistently, you may be able to file harassment charges. Definitely do this if anyone follows you, touches you or just makes you feel uncomfortable in general.
    --Posted by tyciol
    08:27PM EST 08/07/07


    
    They should know how you feel
    They do that? Well, if they do, say something like, "I'm 13, for Pete's sake." They should know how YOU feel.
    --Posted by tallblonde1
    07:53PM EST 08/07/07


    
    It's not that big of a deal
    Although it's quite annoying, I don't see anything wrong with people asking you how old you are. You obviously look quite womanly for your age, although I know people shouldn't just shout out, "Hey, how old are you?" It might embarrass you, but ignore it or answer them. As for people asking you how you're doing, take it as a compliment. People are finding you attractive, but if it makes you feel uncomfortable just keep walking.
    --Posted by havananights92
    08:50AM EST 08/07/07

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