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  you are here  >>> REACT > advice gURL > friends  
  related topics  >>>  being yourself  |  friends & family  |  health  |  school & careers  |  sucky emotions    

 
my bf's black--he won't tell people at school about us

what's advice gURL?

my best friend is 'perfect'

stop whistling at me!

piercing vs. my parents

my boyfriend loves britney

i get teased because i am fat

i'm the only skater girl...

no one else at school is gay

my friends say i'm an oreo

goth and proud of it

i'm mormon and my friends tease me

does my tomboy style drive him away?

my boyfriend's ex still likes him

she has a crush on me

how do you get over someone?

we like the same guy

she only talks about her boyfriend

how can i calm myself?

i'm white, but i'm dating a black guy

i have no privacy

i can't stand my step-mom

everyone thinks my sister's better than me

my family is really poor

my dad doesn't like my friends

i'm falling for my best friend

my friend dates boys i like

my best friend is bisexual

i'm christian but my friend has no idea who god is

my friend has been drinking and doing lots of drugs

i just moved and i have no life

my friend is homophobic.

how can i make friends at my new school?

i'm failing math

i like this guy in my class

french kissing is gross...

i am so pessimistic

i'm afraid to show anyone my poems

i'm nervous about public speaking

people always call me anorexic

i'm scared of guys

my mom thinks i'm insane

i told my friend she's fat

my friends think my boyfriend is ugly

i'm the other woman...

i hate compliments

moody boyfriend...

my christian cousin is gay...

we start dating, i lose interest...

how can i show him that he's being racist?

i am a perpetual liar...

i'm crushing on my gay friend...

my friend's boyfriend likes me...

my mom uses me to get closer to my sister...

my friend is a freeloader...

i hate seeing my mom kiss her boyfriend...

my sister is anorexic...

being confident is boring...

i'm in love with two people...

she's conceited and it's driving me nuts...

her singing voice sucks...

if a guy asks me to dance, how do i say no?

i like him but he's a player...

my two best friends don't get along

i think my boyfriend's cheating...

mom thinks my homecoming date is ugly...

we're friends with benefits but i love him

how do i stand up to a "mean girl"?

i like my friend's boyfriend.

i get teased me because i'm jewish...

i look ugly in pictures...

i look horrible in photos.

what should i get my bf for xmas?

My friend is the biggest flirt.

i can't express my feelings...

my friend is the biggest flirt.

i saw my friend's bf cheating on her...

i don't want to share clothes...

my bf's mom has cancer

my bf got another girl pregnant...

my friend uses her ADD as an excuse

i've got scars on my legs.

i play football

my sister and i like the same guys

my friend's stealing my stuff

my parents fight about money

i'm ashamed of my house.

he asked another girl to prom.

me and my best friend have been drifting apart...

i don't relate to christian school.

my mom focuses on mistakes i've made in the past

my mom's been snooping...

my boyfriend isn't cute.

is he flirting or making fun of me?

how do i tell my mom i want to be a vegan?

I lied about dating a younger boy, my mom would think I'm a loser

I am getting my wisdom teeth out and I am really scared.

My friend is competing with me

my dad insults me

my best friend has a new best friend

i really like my best friend

my boyfriend wants to read my diary

my parents don't believe in dating

my friends tease me for being skinny

are you supposed to shave down there?

i'm an atheist but my mom's a lutheran

my boyfriend never calls me

i want to change my rep for the new school year

my friend thinks i'm the girl of his dreams

both sides want me to choose between them

i have to share a room with an eight year old

i'm 16 and i've NEVER had a boyfriend

my two closest friends just started going out with each other

my mom read my diary

i can't dance

all my friend talks about is her new guy

my friend's mom keeps interfering in our business

my friend makes rude comments about my weight

i'm not allowed to date!

how do you stay friends?

my friend's a perfectionist

my friends are playing tug-of-war with me!

i want people to stop making fun of me...

i cannot get along with my mom...

my boyfriend only wants to hang out with his friends...

i am tired of being single...

she's saying things behind my back...

cheap and thoughtful bday present ideas?

my mom won't let me wear a thong...

how do i let him down without hurting his feelings?

he really has changed but nobody else sees it...

i feel like i'm losing my best friend...

he says if i loved him i would have sex...

i haven't been doing very well in school...

my friend's step-dad just died...

i'm scared he's cheating on me.

i'm scared to sing in front of people.

i have a hard time talking to guys.

i have a hard time talking to guys.

i think she's interested in me...

i am in love with my best friend's boyfriend.

they make fun of me because of my race.

my boyfriend doesn't want to talk to me in public.

my best friend's mom hates me.

i don't have the same feelings for him anymore.

the boys in school make jokes about my boobs...

should i make a move on my crush?

how do I know if i'm in love?

my friend is very homophobic.

my mom and i are always yelling at each other.

my friend doesn't know i like her brother.

my boyfriend has a problem with overweight girls.

my best friend likes my ex-boyfriend.

this one guy makes fun of me.

my boyfriend's family is extremely poor.

i still feel like that fat girl.

my boyfriend is ready to have sex but i'm not.

my eyebrows make me really self-conscious.

i want to be a singer.

my parents are paranoid about me dating.

my best friend ignores me when she has a boyfriend.

i called my friend 'nasty' for not using a condom.

they think i'm anorexic, but i'm not.

my mom is a big emotional mess.

he's been talking to his ex-girlfriend.

my best friend is in love with a complete loser.

what makes a good best friend?

i'm not doing well in school.

my best friend is slowly changing.

is it weird to want to wait to have sex?

i'm embarrassed to buy birth control.

my friend is constantly putting me down.

i get upset when i see my crush and my best friend together.

i just found out my dad is really my step-dad.

my best friend is gay and i think i like her.

why are guys only interested in non-opinionated girls?

i want to be on birth control. how do i ask my mom?

i don't blend in at my new school.

my mom won't let any of my friends drive me places.

my best friend's mom thinks i'm a TOTAL druggie!

my boyfriend doesn't trust me.

my best friend chose her boyfriend over me.

none of my friends take me seriously.

i'm 16 and engaged.

i want to find my real dad.

my best friend slept with my other best friend's boyfriend.

my best friend and my boyfriend can't stand one another.

i'm afraid to go to the prom because of my back acne.

everyone sees me as a tomboy...

i like someone two years younger than me.

my boyfriend is really moody and takes his anger out on me.

I'm noticing annoying things about my best friend that never used to be annoying before.

my dad and grandma are always fighting.

i think my boyfriend's best friend is trying to break us up.

how can i stop being unfaithful and stick with one guy?

i'm a christian but my boyfriend doesn't even believe in god.

i can hear my mom having sex with her boyfriend at night.

what are the pros and cons of waiting to have sex?

how do i gain back my boyfriend's trust?

i have pale skin. should i go to the tanning salon?

i am in love with my brother's best friend.

how do i make a good first impression on my college roommates?

i have my license but my mom won't let me drive on my own.

i don't think i'll have any friends when i go back to school

my parents are getting divorced and i'm freaking out.

i like this guy, but he's four years older than me and lives 600 miles away.

i hate catcalls. what should i do?

my boyfriend's going to college and i'm worried about our relationship.

i don't trust my best friend's boyfriend.

i just transferred to a new school. how do i make friends?

i really like this guy but he has a baby.

everybody makes fun of my big nose.

my boyfriend tells his best friend EVERYTHING about our relationship.

i want to play different music than the guys in my band.

everyone knows what they want to be in the future and i don't.

my boyfriend never wants to hang out with just me.

i told my friend i'm bisexual; now she's acting different around me.

my mom hates my best friend.

i received an email from an old friend who hasn't spoken to me in years.

my boyfriend's best friend is a girl. they spend a lot of time together and i hate it.

i'm starting to like my friend but he's gay. what should i do?

i'm dating this guy that everyone says has an STD. how can i be sure that he's clean?

my crush only sees me as a little kid. how can i get him to notice me?

my dad looks at porn online, then blames my sister and me.

my boyfriend cheated on me and i can't get over it.

my mom doesn't like my boyfriend because he is not christian.

i don't have feelings for my boyfriend. should i end the relationship?

i don't believe in premarital sex but the guys i like don't share the same beliefs. what should i do?

everyone at my school makes racial jokes, and it makes me feel really awkward. what should i do?

my boyfriend gets mad at me when i talk or hang out with my guy friends. what should i do?

i'm labeled as the black girl who acts "white." it's so annoying.

i like this guy, but now my best friend feels like a third wheel.

prom is in april but everyone already has a date--except me!

my boyfriend doesn't do anything special for me. i just want to feel more love...

we are friends with benefits, but i want more. how do i tell him?

my friend is extremely clingy. how do i get her to leave me alone?

i've been depressed lately. has anyone ever been to therapy?

i love my boyfriend, but i don't know how to tell him. should i wait for him to say it first?

my best friend went off to college and i feel like she doesn't care about our friendship anymore.

my boyfriend's best friend is a girl he used to have a crush on.

should i tell my mom that i'm not a virgin?

i'm really self-conscious of this huge birthmark on the back of my leg.

my boyfriend is going to his ex-girlfriend's birthday party. i'm afraid they'll make a drunken mistake.

the butterflies i used to get around my boyfriend have gone away. is this a bad sign?

my parents don't support my vegetarianism. what can i do?

i'm afraid to tell my friends i'm bisexual. what should i do?

does your first time always have to be with someone you love?

how do i break up with my boyfriend without hurting him?

i have a hard time finding clothes that fit. where should i shop?

my boyfriend is moving way too slow. how can i speed things up?

my best friend smokes weed every day. i'm worried, but she won't listen.

my best friend wants to read my diary. how do i keep my private writing private?


My best friend used to be one of the biggest Christians I knew. She went to church and never did anything wrong. But now, since we've been in high school, she's slowly changing. She likes this new guy who's into drugs and alcohol. She's turned into a complete jerk to everyone--making fun of people and such. Not to mention, she's also getting into alcohol; that way she "fits in" with everyone else, especially this guy.

I love her and I've been best friends with her for 7 years now. I don't want to give up our friendship because it's lasted so long and she still has a good side to her. But I just don't think it's right for her to get into stuff just to fit in with the guy she likes. What should I do?

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28 member responses

    
    Listen to your heart
    Hey, if you have been her best friend for seven years already you will know that if she's acting strangely that means that she might be changing. I know that you don't want your best friend to like this guy because you want the best for her. In other cases, maybe her hormones are changing because she is becoming more mature. Talk to her and see how she reacts. It's a good thing because it shows you care for her.
    --Posted by msperfect
    11:17PM EST 11/08/06


    
    Make the choice
    I think that friendship is very important. Tell your friend how you feel. Try to get through to her that she had a good thing going before and now she's goin downhill. If she's truly your friend then she will listen to what you are saying and take it into consideration and hopefully change. If not, go to her parents. She may get mad, but down the road, she'll realize that you are her true friend and everything will come together.
    --Posted by proudsista91
    06:41PM EST 11/08/06


    
    Confront her
    Just see if you can sit her down and talk to her. Tell her everything that is on your mind and how you feel about the situation. Sometimes that works and sometimes it doesn't. Remind her of the person that she used to be and the person that you always knew. Sometimes you just can't change a person regardless of what you want to do. But it is always worth a shot to try your best...you never know until you try.
    --Posted by gurl_simplygorgeous
    04:25PM EST 11/08/06


    
    Let her know
    She probably doesn't know that she's being a jerk. And if she does realize it, then she's probably only doing it because she's insecure. Let her know what she's doing is out of character and that she's really leting herself down by lowering her standards for a guy. You could remind her of how much fun you two had together before this guy, without the drugs and alcohol.
    --Posted by retro_betty
    03:21PM EST 11/08/06


    
    I know how you feel!!!
    My friend did the same thing. Try and confront her, though it probably won't do much good. I don't talk to my friend anymore. Give it a shot.
    --Posted by evanescencefan42
    11:10PM EST 11/07/06



    
    Happens to everyone.
    This happens to a lot of people. Just go with what happens. You can't change what happens. People change and then you just have to move on with life.
    --Posted by sexychica106722
    09:48PM EST 11/07/06


    
    It's Hard
    It's hard when a friend changes, but you have to know you can't change her. She is responsible for herself. And yes, you're being a good friend for being concerned for her. Take the risk and tell her how she's been acting and that you are concerned about her. If all goes wrong, give her a chance to cool off.
    --Posted by violin_4square_gurl
    06:35PM EST 11/07/06


    
    Talk to her
    Talk to her and figure out why she changed. Tell her that you want to be her friend, but you can't if she's going to get into bad things.
    --Posted by xtremelver4u
    05:50PM EST 11/07/06

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