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  you are here  >>> REACT > advice gURL > family  
  related topics  >>>  dating  |  friends & family    

 

I'm not allowed to date! And it's mostly my sister's fault. When she got into high school she went through this whole skanky phase where she dated a different guy every two weeks, and needless to say, my parents didn't approve. Now that I'm in high school, my parents won't let me date because they're afraid I'll do the same thing. I'm not asking this question because I want to date...I just want to be available if someone really good comes along. So my question is, what can I do to show them that I really am mature and responsible enough to have a boyfriend?

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    I'm sure your sister's multiple flings have a lot to do with your parents' regulations. But it might not be the whole story. They probably aren't assuming you'll go off and do the same thing. What's more likely is that their experience with your sister has made them realize there's a threat out there they are worried about. So calmly ask them about it. Say, "I know you guys don't want me to date. And I respect that. But I'd really like to understand why. I'm getting the feeling that you don't think I'm mature enough to date. Is that true? Is there anything I can do to change that?" Let's face it. Your parents aren't going to respond to cries of, "It's not fair!" Speak to them like reasonable adults and I'm sure they'll pay you back in kind.
    --Posted by madmalkavian
    04:07PM EST 11/02/05


    
    Hey
    The same thing happened to my sister. She decided that maybe if she showed an intrest in something other than boys our parents would let her date. I am not saying that it will work but you should give it a try.
    --Posted by shoplivelove
    04:01PM EST 11/01/05


    
    Hiya
    OMG! I totally know what you are going through! This is what I would do...If you get a date, ask your folks if they could at least meet him and invite him 'round for dinner or somthing. They will see you are able to choose boys wisely and that you are sensible when it comes to this sort of thing! Good luck! xxx
    --Posted by chazzamail
    02:32PM EST 11/01/05


    
    Hey
    I think what you need to do is sit down and talk to them and tell them you aren't your sister and that you wouldn't do something like that. If you do make mistakes they'll be your own, and different.
    --Posted by fosheshe
    11:29PM EST 10/30/05


    
    
    Well, to start out with, everyone is different. I know how it is not to have your parents trust you because of something a sibling does. My mom does not want me to date because my sister met some guys and she dated them. Well, that was ok, but when she broke it off with them, they would do things to her that would show how angry they were. Well anyways, my advice to you is to talk to your parents. You should tell them how you feel. If they still don't agree with you, ask them what they would do in your situation.
    --Posted by angel6
    07:45PM EST 10/30/05

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