Like this, except WAY less clothes! | Source: Shutterstock

But there’s one very important “rite of passage” that all girls seem a little hesitant to talk about out loud … that’s right ladies, I’m talking about watching porn. And these days, with online porn so easily accessible, it’s a much easier rite of passage to . . . pass!

I don’t know why but it seems like guys can get away with everything way easier than us girls can. Am I right? They can sleep with a bunch of different chicks and get high-fives from their friends the next day; but if we do the same thing, we’ll probably be criticized and looked down on.

At my high school people sort of had the same thought process when it came to watching online porn. Guys could watch it and it was fine, but if a girl said she watched porn, then she was totally the modern day Hester Prynne (Scarlet Letter, anyone?) and would be the subject of a week of gossip, for sure.

For me, the thought of girls and guys getting naked and down and dirty on camera and then showing up on some online porn site was insane, but for some reason, the fact that it was kind of taboo made me want to watch it even more. So I decided, I was going to do it; I was going to secretly watch porn.

Oh HELLO lover! | Source: Shutterstock

Then, I typed into the Google search bar that sinister four-letter word. P-O-R-N. (It was my first time, what do you expect?) I sat there on my bed for a minute, frozen with anticipation. An Internet, full of online porn videos and pictures of people getting it on for my personal enjoyment was just a mouse-click away . . .

Click. An endless list of sites emerged on my computer screen; I chose the first. Immediately, pictures of naked, contorted bodies doing things I didn’t even know existed, filled the screen. Sex ads were popping up every second, getting progressively more disturbing. All I could think was “MAKE IT STOP!!!”

After I quit hyperventilating, I eventually cleared out all of the advertisements until I got to the original online porn site that I had wanted to look at. Yes there were naked girls, yes there were naked boys, yes they were having sex, yes they were doing just about everything in the book. And yes I kind of liked it.

You can even get nail polish ideas from porn! | Source: Shutterstock

That was my first time watching porn, but it definitely wasn’t my last. I can honestly say, while some things porn-related things are definitely not up my alley, most sites also offer “porn for females” sections that are fun to watch, but can also teach you things about sex! (So if you’re curious, check those out first!)

So basically, I’m not saying “GO WATCH PORN, IT’S AWESOME,” but I’m not saying it’s a bad thing that all girls should avoid, either. Watching online porn isn’t for everyone, but it’s definitely one of those rite of passage milestones that I’ll always remember.

Have you ever watched online porn? What do you think about it? Do you think porn is healthy and fun or kind of a bad thing? Tell us in the comments!

This Girl LOVES Porn. I Mean . . . Loves.

Jizz is just another word for cum! | Source: Shutterstock

But what is jizz and why does it end up in this guy’s pants? Basically, it is just a slang term for the fluid that is released when a guy ejaculates.

Ejaculating, or having an orgasm, happens when a guy’s penis has been stimulated to the point where liquid squirts from his body. Technically, this substance is known as semen, or ejaculate, though a lot of people also call it cum (and as legions of high school guys and dumb comedies regularly remind us, “jizz”).

Now for the details: semen (or jizz) is made up of sperm from the testicles that mix with fluid from internal reproductive organs, like the prostate and the ejaculatory duct. When it leaves the body, semen can be whitish or yellowish, may have a mild odor, and is often sticky or clumpy. Though it might seem like a lot comes out when a guy ejaculates, only about a tablespoon of liquid actually leaves his body. But it can do so fast – almost 60 miles an hour in some cases!

Whatever you call it, it is important to realize that since semen (or jizz, or cum, or ejaculate) contains sperm, if it gets into a girl’s vagina, it can cause pregnancy. Semen can also pass sexually transmitted infections, so it is important to use a condom not only for vaginal sex, but for oral and anal sex, as well.

Ejaculating is perfectly normal. So is making up slang words to describe it. Did you ever have to ask, “What is jizz?” How do you feel about the word jizz? Do you think it sounds funny? Sexy? Gross? Let us know in the comments!

So, Now . . . What The Hell Is Up With Blue Balls?

The most dangerous aspect of sex toys for your own personal use? This. | Source: Shutterstock

Millions of girls have these gadgets next to their beds and in their purses, and once you’ve got one you tend to wonder how you ever lived without it–and now they’re on their way to being the biggest selling gadget on the freakin’ planet.

Oh, you thought we were talking about SmartPhones? Not quite, though it does come with batteries. We’re talkin’ vibrators and sex toys, girls.

Sex toys are set to make close to $650 million in global sales this year alone. That’s a lot of Rabbits. Experts think the surge in sales comes from the fact that celebs have been talking about them on talk shows more now than ever–similarly to how they flew off the shelves when Sex and the City was big.

Another factor? While most sex toy shops are for 18+ and separated from seedy movies by weird beaded curtains from 1994, a lot of sexy accessories are now being sold in drug stores–seriously, an aisle over from shampoo and tampons, you can pick up a vibrating ring without proof of ID. Additionally, for the underage and/or bashful, online shops let you pick out your peen privately (and they usually ship pretty discreetly, too).

For those of you who aren’t so shy, passion parties are also getting big. Unfamiliar? We were too, so here’s the  gist: This particular writer gets invited to one and asks the hostess what it’s like. Hostess replies, “Oh, it’s like a Tupperware party! Don’t worry, there’s gonna be food.” Writer shows up, and there is food. There’s also a lot of plastic and rubber, but none that you’d use to store your lunch. Not gonna lie, that particular situation was a little weird, if only because said writer kept wondering what was gonna happen to that pie she’d brought! (Mystery revealed? We ate it.)

Don't forget to recharge. | Source: Shutterstock

Thing is, sex toys aren’t really anything to be too embarrassed about (though we totally get being private about it). It’s your body, and it’s the best way to have safe sex while exploring it. Think of it this way: Without a partner, you don’t have to worry about pesky things like getting pregnant or catching an STD). And once you find something you dig? Awesome. For if and when that happens, we recommend rechargeable batteries. Another bonus? By getting to know what works for you, you’ll be able to help partners out when they’re trying to get you off later.

And the makers of smart phones shouldn’t feel too bad, either–you can use one to order your new buzzy accessory!

Have you ever used sex toys? Would you be embarrassed to go to a sex shop? Would you use them only solo or with a partner? Dish in the comments!

Want To Know More About . . . Masturbation?!

Well, that's one way to do it. | Source: Shutterstock

Okay, when it comes to gossip, there’s one topic that never gets old (even though it’s nobody’s business): Who is having sex?! But here’s something kind of surprising, ladies! Over 70 percent of girls 17 and under have never had sex. And those of you who do have sex? You’re a lot more likely to do it safely and using effective birth control methods (and usually more than one, like using condoms even if you’re on the Pill).

A lot of news outlets reporting on this are surprised by it, especially after a wonky survey came out last week that made teens sound pretty clueless about sex in general. But now that these new findings have hit, it may actually make some sense: Teens may have reported that they don’t know much about sex because not as many of you are participating in it firsthand, so you feel clueless despite actually being well-informed on the topic in general.

But guess what? It doesn’t shock us one bit.

We know you’re smart–heck, we can see that just by reading a lot of your comments. You have a ton going for you, between school, activities, and generally being awesome that you don’t feel as much of a need to cave to pressure, because, well, you have other ish to do! You’re confident and involved enough to know that anyone who pushes you into something isn’t right for you and that you can do better. And you’re responsible enough to use appropriate precautions when you’re ready and willing to go all the way with whatever guy is lucky enough to have you. And whenever that happens for you? Well, that’s your business since it’s your body and your decision! As a matter of fact, you gals are so awesome that despite being a generation surrounded by Juno and Jenelle Evans, you actually brought the teen pregnancy rate to its lowest point since 1946. Nice work, ladies!

Bella waited til marriage, but was still a little clueless. You're smarter than that! | Source: Shutterstock

And when the rumor mill at school starts up about who is having sex or who is having sex with who–just keep in mind that a lot of it might just be vicious talk designed to tear people down. Lots of girls aren’t having sex, and if you’re one of them, you’re not alone one bit.

What we’re basically saying is, you kick ass. You kick ass in general, but especially lately when it comes to be sexually and socially responsible. We already knew that. We’re just pretty stoked that the rest of the world is finally catching on.

Are there rumors at your school about who is having sex? Are you and your pals sexually active? How do you practice safe sex? Do these findings match up with the people you know or do you think they’re way off? Are you waiting to have sex until you’re really ready or for another reason? Tell us in the comments!

When You Do Have Sex, You Must Watch This!

Find out what feels good to you! | Source: Shutterstock

Still, even though as your official Pleasure Educator, I can tell you for sure that orgasms are not the be-all, end-all of sex–they feel great and everybody wants to have one. So you want to know how to have an orgasm? Let’s see if I can help!

Orgasmic release may result from a fantastic solo sexual session with just yourself or with another person, but it’s just one float in the big sexy parade. Oh, jeez. Am I really going to make a Thanksgiving Parade analogy? Yup, I think I am.

I grew up in NYC so when I was a kid, we’d check out the Thanksgiving Day Parade. They had floats, baton twirlers and all kinds of stuff but the biggest draw was supposed to be Santa Claus. However, we all came to enjoy different parts of the parade. Some came for the drumming and bands and others were in it for the high flying characters in the sky. A bunch of other people stayed ‘til the end for the dude in the red suit. In other words, Santa was awesome but he wasn’t the whole source of fun at the parade. Got it? Santa’s like the orgasm? Good.

Take the “am I doing it right” pressure off of yourself. Stop stressing about your belly or hair down there. If you’re caught up in the pressure of having to have an orgasm, guess what? That is exactly the way NOT to have one. Take a deep breath, relax and let go. How to have an orgasm? Stop freaking out and try to have fun!

The cool thing is that you have access to your beautiful body 24 hours a day 7 days a week to figure out what may or may not be pleasurable for you, give or take your work, school and social hours (nobody wants you, um, exploring during class or at the mall!).

Be in the moment, my chicas. If you have an orgasm during sexy times, dy-no-mite. If you don’t have an orgasm, that’s cool too. It might take a while to have your first one–and even then, know that you might not have one every time. Since most girls and women do experience orgasms, you probably will at some point, too!

So how do you know if it’s happened yet? WOWZERS!!! Trust me. You’ll know when it happens!

Do you have any tips on how to have an orgasm? Do you think girls and guys put too much pressure on girls to orgasm? Tell me what you think in the comments!

Does Your Vagina Look Weird? Find Out!

Source: Shutterstock

I’ve always been really honest with the people I’ve dated. If I’m not comfortable enough to get physical, or to get physical in the way they maybe want to, I say so and it’s not a big deal. I like to think I date cool people, and cool people respect the people they date!

Well, turns out, I dated one dude who wasn’t so considerate. We were smooching on the couch one night and he said he wanted to have sex with me. Now, we hadn’t been dating for that long, and even though I thought I would probably be ready to do that with him soon–I wasn’t quite there yet.

So I told him, without skipping a beat, that I thought he was really amazing and I would probably be ready for that soon, but just . . . not yet. I was shocked at what happened next.

He seriously jumped up from the couch and said, “Well then, honey? I’m just going to go get physical with somebody who’s ready for something hot to happen!”

What the hell? When did the sweet dude I was dating turn into the skeeziest wannabe Lothario on the planet? YUCK!

I drove home and never “got physical” with him at all! His loss!

What’s the worst date you’ve been on? Tell us in the comments.

You’ll Never Believe What This Rude Guy Said!

OMG. The fire alarm?! | Source: Shutterstock

A couple days later he called and said if I still felt that way, he could, you know, maybe help out. What can I say, I have good friends. I laughed and thanked him for the offer.

And then a week later, he came over. I was making dinner and put some homemade soup on the stove, but then we went in my room and got…distracted. I decided it was time to finally have penis-vagina sex. My friend asked me if I was sure a bunch of times, I said I was, and it was game on.

Both of us generally thought sex and genitals were funny, but this was a whole different level. I was uncomfortable. We put a pillow under my hips. We had to change positions, my buddy lost his erection. We sat and tried coaxing his penis back up. He regained his erection, so we had to change the condom and try all over again. And then?

It could have looked like this! | Source: Shutterstock

More coaxing an erection back to life, me being in pain, mood totally lost, apartment smelled terrible (and for the next few days, too). We gave up, got dressed…and picked up pizza. Hey, we still needed dinner, right?

I promise you I have been very attentive when cooking soup ever since.

Are you nervous about your first time at sex? Was your first time as crazy as mine? Tell me all about it in the comments!

Worried About Telling Him You’re A Virgin? Here’s How To Do It

How much do you know about sex and how to keep it safe? | Source: Shutterstock

Stupid. Dumb. Uninformed. That’s what some experts think you are when it comes to sex. I can see your eye-roll now. Don’t think I can’t. But really, how much do you know about sex? If one survey is any indication, not much.

The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy called over 1,000 teens (and another 1,000+ adults) and their findings were pretty worrisome. A whopping 42% of teens they surveyed think that “it doesn’t matter whether you use birth control or not, when it is your time to get pregnant, it will happen.” Uh, really? It’s not like Storkzilla swoops down from a tree and VOILA–you’re pregnant! There are things like condoms and birth control pills that are scientifically proven to prevent pregnancy, people!

Anyway, this apparent widespread belief in Storkzilla is freaking us out, guys. While we have no idea about anyone the the campaign called other than their age range, it’s not a good sign that so many participants were so passive about their sexual health. Chances are if you use birth control correctly and responsibly, you won’t get pregnant. “Your time to get pregnant” will come a lot sooner if you ignore precautions like contraceptives and condoms. You guys are smarter than this!

Despite claiming to know about sex, a lot of people don't know how to use condoms! | Source: Shutterstock

As a matter of fact, most of the respondents even admitted themselves that they’re smarter than that: 86% of those surveyed said they had all the info necessary to prevent an unplanned pregnancy (that’s what we love to hear!). The bad news? Way more than half of the same group said they know next to nothing about how to use male condoms, which are a huge (or magnum sized, if you will) weapon in your arsenal of STD and pregnancy prevention tools. Those numbers do not add up, ladies–and may explain why the United States has the highest teen pregnancy rate in the developed world.

A silver lining? Despite these findings, teen pregnancy rates in the U.S. are the lowest they’ve been since 1940 (good job, girls). But this survey suggests that a whole lot of work still needs to be done before a lot of us know about sex as much as we think we do.

Do you have sex ed in your school? How much do you think you know about sex? Do you think you and your friends need to know more about sex? Tell us in the comments!

Want To Talk To Your Dude About Condoms? Here’s How

What's so funny about this number? | Source: Shutterstock

What is a 69? And what the hell makes it more funny than, say, 14?

Sixty-nine describes a sexual act where two people give each other oral sex at the same time. You see how the round part of the numbers 6 and 9 looks like someone’s bobble head? If you think of one person as a the number six and the other person as number nine, the two people’s bodies are turned upside down to each other so that the mouths and genitals are together.

Got it? Good.

So, here’s the deal, ladies. Like any other sexual act, not every person or couple does 69 or has to. If you’re into it, it’s cool. Oral sex is totally normal and can be super fun for both of you. But if some dude is pressuring you into it? Not cool. It’s your beautiful body. Anything you want to do or not do with it is completely up to you.

And if you’re like, “Woah! I haven’t even gotten my first kiss yet, and now I’m supposed to kiss his WHAT?!” Don’t freak. If you make it to age 69 without ever doing a 69 it’s nothing to worry about. But at least now you’re in on the joke!

Now that you’ll never have to ask,”What is a 69?” again, what other sex questions do you have? Tell us in the comments!

Want To Know About More Sexy Stuff?

Source: Shutterstock

Speaking of losing things, guys and girls have been debating pretty much forever on where to find something in particular–the G-spot. Until recently, it’s been kind of like Bigfoot–people have claimed to have seen it, but no one has pictures or proof beyond anecdotal evidence. And c’mon, the G-spot can’t even leave footprints, so who do you believe?

Until now, that is. One semi-retired doctor claims he found the ever-elusive G-spot… By dissecting a dead 83-year-old woman. Uh, WTF?!

We just can’t help but be really creeped out by all this. Imagine a newly dead elderly woman’s vag being cut open, inspected, dissected, and analyzed. This isn’t gross to you? The doc in question, Dr. Adam Ostrzenski, claims he doesn’t like all the publicity and attention he’s getting from this. Then broski, why publish it? Especially since it’s only a study of one dead little old lady and a lot more research needs to be done?

The same guy has made a name for himself in his Florida medical community as a gynecologist who specializes in things like vaginal rejuvenation (which makes you “tighter”), labioplasty (altering your labia minora and majora)–which are a whole other rant entirely, since chances are there’s not a single thing wrong with your lady bits.

We’re all for science and medical advancements–who doesn’t want to be healthier and live the best life possible? It’s just the inherent fascination with the G-spot, which still hasn’t been proven or disproven to exist–that bugs us.

Why not let women and girls find out for themselves what feels good to them, especially since everyone is different? The idea of anyone telling us what should and shouldn’t bring an orgasm makes it kind of nervewracking, doesn’t it? Because then if something doesn’t particularly turn you on, you may feel like there’s something wrong with you.

Guess what? There isn’t. There is, however, a lot wrong with people’s obsessions over our private parts and private lives. Maybe if everyone could relax and let us do what comes naturally and what we enjoy, we wouldn’t need to research G-spots so frantically–because it wouldn’t matter!

Do you think doctors should keep researching the G-spot or that they’d be better off leaving it be? Do you think the G-spot exists? Sound off in the comments!

Now, What About Blue Balls? Do Those Exist?