Yikes! This should not be your sex face. | ShutterStock

Sex isn’t something new for me, but lately it’s been painful. Why could this be happening?

ChickRx expert Dr. Kathy McMahon, Clinical Psychologist & Diplomate of Sex Therapy says:

Thanks for writing in. And sorry that sex has been painful for you recently. Sex is something that should be pleasurable, so let’s try and figure out what’s going on and get to the bottom of this sex pain.

I can think of three reasons sex could suddenly start to hurt.

The first cause is what some would call a “bruised vulva.” Your vulva, the outer part of your genitals, can get bruised just like any other part of your body. This can happen from a number of causes–like hitting a hard bump when you’re on a bike or even from sex. The nerves and muscle of your vulva tissue get bruised, but you might not notice right away. Sexual arousal and penetration could cause swelling, which would would irritate your injury and make the bruise more sensitive. The solution here is time. A vulva bruise will heal, just like any other bruise. You might just want to take a break from sex until it does.

The second issue you might be facing is called vulvodynia, which is a burning in your genital region. There are many causes and possible cures for vulvodynia. The issue that I’ve come across most regularly is actually caused by particularly alkaline urine, which basically means the acid levels in the urine are off. The urine splashes up from toileting and creates irritation. One woman I worked with found that taking 1 to 2 grams of calcium ascorbate (a form of Vitamin C) help ease her pain. If you think you could have vulvodynia, I’d recommend going to a doctor for a diagnosis and treatment plan.

Another potential reason is that some women have a hymen that is particularly thick and tough. This will make her first intercourse painful. Following this, there is often little or no pain for quite some time. Then, about a year afterward, the remaining tissue of the now broken hymen gets scarred from repeated intercourse, and eventually stops stretching. This scar tissue could be what’s causing the pain. Again, the fix for this involves going to the doctor for a closer look.

I know that I said it a few times above, but please check in with a doctor. He or she will be able to diagnose you and get you back on the path to pleasurable, pain-free sex!

Got more questions? Post them in the comments below or head on over to ChickRx.com.

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Brazilian waxing for men is on the rise. Among other things. | Source: ShutterStock

A new study says that about 73 percent of guys wax their nether regions! Also fun? One in ten guys somehow–they didn’t specify whether through waxing, shaving, or something else–gets rid of hair on his tush, too.

Waxing for men has taken off in part because of shows like Jersey Shore (RIP!). Dudes are sporting smoother skin than ever, and regardless of whether you find waxing for men to be weird or hot, we’re sort of happy that it’s happening. Because it means that guys are going through a lot of the same torture-like nonsense that they expect us to do. (Now they just have to feel pressured to bleach their privates, get plastic surgery on them, and maybe wear heels.)

Guys aren’t just getting Brazilian waxes on their butts and full-frontal regions. Dudes are also waxing their eyebrows (be careful, boys–don’t overdo it!), chests (ouch!), back (that sounds tough), nose (ow!), and ears (yikes!). Less than one third of guys go au naturale and let it all hang out, letting their furry flags fly.

Another trend that’s a little weirder? You’ve probably heard of vajazzling. Well, guys have their own version now: Pejazzling. Yup, guys are applying crystals to their freshly waxed penises for whatever reason. And we think that part’s a little unsound. Think about the logistics: You could, ostensibly, get a sequin or crystal fall off where you really don’t want it. Yikes!

Do you think waxing for guys is cool or do you prefer your guys a little hairier? Would you ever get with a guy who was into pejazzling? Tell us in the comments!

Wait–these people think girls put crystals WHERE?

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Avoid post-sex stress by using a condom. | Source: ShutterStock

Can I time when I have unprotected sex around my cycle to avoid pregnancy?

ChickRx expert Dr. Mandi Beman, Ob/Gyn says:

The birth control method of timing sex around your ovulation cycle to avoid pregnancy is often called the rhythm method.

And theoretically, yes, you can time unprotected sex around your cycle to avoid pregnancy. In reality, if you are truly trying to prevent pregnancy I would NOT use the rhythm method.

Of every 100 women who use this type of birth control method, up to 24 will become pregnant in first year, according to Planned Parenthood! That’s so, so many and a huge risk to take.

There are a few reasons that the rhythm method just doesn’t work as effective birth control. Most women’s fertile time varies month to month. So, even if you’re keeping super careful track of your ovulation cycle, you could have it totally wrong just because you’re having an off month. It’s really difficult to know when to time intercourse.

Also, sperm can live in the vagina for as many as 5 days after intercourse. Even if you timed the sex right, sperm could be making their way to your eggs five days after your non-fertile time…when you’re very, very fertile.

I’d suggest talking to your doctor about other birth control methods that are more effective, like the pill.

Also, you girls are smart enough to know this and I probably don’t have to remind you, but birth control methods like the pill or rhythm method (even when it works) don’t protect against any STDs. You should wear a condom any and every time you have sex.

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Got more questions? Post them in the comments below or head on over to ChickRx.com.

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Wait, I have muscles down there? | Source: ShutterStock

Are Kegels really something I should be doing? And, um, what are they?

ChickRx expert Evelyn Resh, Certified Sexuality Counselor and Nurse/Midwife says:

Kegels are a specific exercise to strengthen the muscles in the pelvic floor, which is a hammock-like group of muscles underneath your genitals and throughout your boney pelvis. These muscles hold up your vagina, uterus and bladder.

The best way to learn Kegels is to sit on the toilet and start peeing and then stop your flow of urine before you’re completely done. You do this by pulling up and contracting the muscles in your vagina and holding onto that contraction for 2-5 seconds. Then relax the muscles completely and finish peeing. Remember, this is the way to learn the exercise but you don’t have to actually do Kegels when you pee. In fact, Kegel exercises can be done any time and in any position.

The value of the exercise is that it helps prevent weakening on the muscles that support your pelvic organs. Doing Kegels improves muscle strength and blood circulation throughout the pelvis. In a perfect world, adult women would do these exercises daily in 2 sets of 15. But the fact is that despite their proven benefits, few women are diligent about Kegels. For teen gals, Kegel exercises are not as important as they are for woman after they’ve had a baby or after 40.

In your teens, your muscles tone is strong. But after childbirth and the longer we spend defying gravity by standing up, these muscles weaken. If I were you, I would learn how to do Kegel exercises, practice them and try to develop the routine of doing them. But if you don’t, don’t feel bad or worried. I guarantee you that someone later in life will suggest them to you and you can catch-up then.

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Keep your urinary tract infection free! | Source: ShutterStock

How can I avoid getting UTIs so often?

ChickRx expert Dr. Mandi Beman, Ob/Gyn says…

Unfortunately, UTIs, or urinary tract infections, are common in young, healthy women. A UTI is an infection in the area of your body that makes urine, or pee. Anything that can introduce bacteria into your bladder can lead to an infection. And lots of stuff can do that like wiping back-to-front after a bowel movement or sexual intercourse. Also, some women may have a difference in their anatomy or genetics that may make them more susceptible to UTIs.

Even though UTIs are common and not a problem if you treat them early, there are a few things you can do to decrease your chances of getting another UTI:

- Stay well hydrated
- Urinate after intercourse to flush out bacteria
- Drink cranberry juice (a compound in cranberry juice, called tannin, makes it harder for bacteria to stick to the bladder)
- Wipe from front-to-back after a bowel movement
- Do not have vaginal sex after anal sex

UTIs can lead to other more serious infections, such as pyelonephritis (infection of the kidney) or sepsis (infection of the blood) if left untreated. So, if you think you have one or you’re having frequent infections be sure to see your doctor!

Got more questions? Post them in the comments below or anonymously ask your own health and wellness questions and get expert answers at ChickRx.com.

Is it normal not to like oral sex?

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What’s normal is all about what’s normal for you! | Source: ShutterStock

Is it normal if oral sex doesn’t really do anything for me?

ChickRx expert Evelyn Resh, Certified Sexuality Counselor and Nurse/Midwife says:

What’s normal when it comes to sex really boils down to what’s normal for you. And while oral sex is wonderful for a lot of people, oral sex just isn’t for everyone. Women of all ages have told me that it’s just not their thing and they never have orgasms from oral sex.

And yeah, this can get complicated if your partner just loves oral sex and you don’t share his or her enthusiasm. But, depending on your reasons why it’s not first on your list, you can sometimes change those circumstances to make the experience more appealing. For example, if the big hold up for you is that you’re worried that you don’t smell or taste right down there, you can take a shower break before getting into oral sex. (Let me just jump in here and say that your vagina totally smells and tastes like a normal vagina, but I understand that vagina odor insecurity can factor in bigtime when it comes to oral sex.)

Another issue could be that you’re not relaxed enough during oral sex or comfortable enough with your partner. Oral sex is very intimate, some would say it’s even more intimate than vaginal sex. And for it to be enjoyable and end in an orgasm, you need to be comfortable and relaxed. That could just come from spending more time getting to know your partner or it could come from practicing relaxation techniques like deep breathing.

If you don’t have a specific oral sex hold up, and you’re thinking, “I just don’t like oral sex,” that’s fine too. You’re facing an important fact that we all discover when it comes to sexual preferences: You can’t have it all. You may like other parts of physical intimacy better and just not be into oral sex at all. You don’t have to like everything. This is why finding a way to communicate with your partner about sex is so important. Let him or her know what feels good to you and what doesn’t.

Figuring out what you like and what you don’t when it comes to sex is something you’ll be exploring forever and your tastes may or may not change, depending on your partner. The most important thing to remember is this: You should never be forced to do anything that you don’t want to do. If this is happening with you guy or gal, get out of the relationship and don’t look back.

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Cosmo thinks you might put crystals in your vagina. Okay. | Source: ShutterStock

Aside from just odd stuff like anti-aging treatments for vaginas (no, seriously), pubic hair designs (whatever), pubic wigs (called merkins–uh, wtf) vagina blush (apparently that’s a thing now?), there are also some pretty painful sounding procedures. Cosmo reported that women are getting things implanted in their vaginas to “improve” the texture. Some of these things included crystals to “increase energy.”

Wait, what? WTF? Who? Why? Why do you need rocks in your vagina? What’s going on?

New York Magazine did a little investigative work of their own and found that, hey! Women actually aren’t doing that.

For the love of Niall Horan, your vagina looks fine. Seriously. Your vagina doesn’t need bleach, a lacefront weave, a face, or any “more energy,” and whoever says that it does probably just needs more medication. Your vagina doesn’t need rocks shoved up, in, or around it (dude, wouldn’t that hurt?). The best thing you can do for your vagina is to leave it alone.

The second best thing you can do for your vagina? Ignore 99% of what Cosmo says at any given time.

Do you think Cosmo tries too hard? Would you ever consider getting anything implanted in your vagina? Do you think enhancing a vagina is necessary? Tell us in the comments!

What should and shouldn’t you put in your vagina?

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Got something brewing down there? | Source: ShutterStock

Is the bump on my vagina an ingrown hair or something more serious?

ChickRx expert Dr. Diana Hoppe, Ob/Gyn and Sexual Health Expert says:

Glad you asked that question. I have a lot of young women who come into my office very concerned about bumps on their pubic area. For the most part, a little education in ingrown hairs could save them a whole lot of worrying.

So, an ingrown hair infection usually occurs after shaving. There will be redness around certain hair follicles. Typically, these aren’t that big. (Think less than pea size.) The follicle will be surrounded by only a small amount of redness. This redness is the inflammation caused by the infection.

While ingrown hairs aren’t pretty or fun, they’re nothing to freak over. They are best controlled by applying an anti-bacterial ointment immediately after shaving your bikini line or really, anywhere on your pelvic area. Bacitracin works really well. It’s an ointment that you can get at any drug store.

If the area becomes more red and inflamed and the bump is bigger than a pea, it could be a different kind of infection. For example, the bump could actually be an abscess. This kind of bump on your vagina needs to be looked at by a doctor. It might need to be drained or you could be put on antibiotics to fix it.

I’m just talking about bumps on the hairy part of your pubic region now because you asked about ingrown hairs. If you notice a bump or lesion on the inner, pink area (or the vulva), you should definitely talk to a doctor. That could mean something a bit more serious is brewing…or it could be nothing. But, when in doubt, always seek medical advice. We doctors are around for a reason!

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What’s going on down there, girl? | Source: ShutterStock

How much vaginal discharge is normal?

ChickRx expert Dr. Diana Hoppe, Ob/Gyn and Sexual Health Expert says:

The amount of vaginal discharge that is “normal” varies. Like anything that goes on with your body, “normal” changes from person to person.

Also, with vaginal discharge, what’s normal for you will vary depending on where you are in your menstrual cycle. Right after your period, there probably won’t be much discharge. At mid-cycle, around 14 days from the first day of your period, there may be quite a bit of thin, string-like, egg-white textured discharge. This is right around when you’re ovulating, which is when your egg is released.

At around day 21, the discharge will become thicker and less in amount. It will be white and mucusy. And then around day 28, you’ll get your period which should be bright to deep red discharge that can be thin or thicker and will likely have some clots.

Vaginal discharge is totally normal and means that your vagina is healthy. If you notice, I didn’t focus on amount of discharge above, but color and consistency. That’s what you should be focusing on when it comes to discharge and wondering if it’s “normal” or not.

If any discharge you have seems off color, has a funky smell or feels different that your typical vaginal discharge, head on over to a doctor. Chances are it’s not a big deal and if it is something, it can be fixed pretty easily. Going to a doctor when in doubt is always a good idea.

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Ask an expert: How should I masturbate?

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So far, so good. Keep going, girl! | Source: Shutterstock

Question: How do I know the right way to masturbate when I’m just starting?

ChickRx expert Dr. Melanie Davis, Certified Sexuality Educator says:

Good question! The short answer is you’ll know you’re doing it right if it feels good. I know, not the most satisfying answer. But, masturbation is so totally personal that there’s no one right way to do it.

When you’ve got some privacy, feel your entire vulva (all the pink, non-hair-bearing skin) to see what likes to be touched the most. The most sensitive part is usually the clitoris, which tends to hide like a small pink pearl under a hood of skin at the top of the vulva, tucked between the outer lips.

Some girls find it exciting to concentrate on the physical sensations. Others like to touch themselves while imagining a sexy partner, scene from a movie, story, etc. The longer you touch yourself, the wetter your vulva will feel. That’s a good sign you’re on the right track. It means your body is getting excited.

Some girls use their fingertips or their entire palm. Some rub a pillow, a stuffed animal, or a blanket against their clitoris. Some girls roll onto their belly and rub their clitoris against their bed. Still others might purchase battery-powered or electric toy called a vibrator to provide a pleasant buzzing sensation.

Keep experimenting with different ways of touching yourself. When something feels really, really good, stay with it, enjoy it, and relax. If your body is ready to experience an orgasm, your breathing will get faster, your mind will focus more closely on your genital sensations, your body may tense, and your hand movements may become faster or harder. If you continue, you may experience a sudden release of all that tension and feel a flush of warmth in your body that feels really good – that’s an orgasm!

Enjoy exploring! Masturbation is a great way to learn what you enjoy so that if and when you’re ready, you can teach a partner what you like.

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Have you ever worried about masturbating the wrong way? Does this post make you feel better about your way of doing it? Let me know in the comments.

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