So if you want to come across as a fun challenge for whoever you’ve got your eye on, playing hard to get is heartily suggested. But it can be a lot of work and we want to avoid a lot of work as much as possible, right? Check out our Lazy Girl’s Guide To Playing Hard To Get and become the apple of your crush’s eye ASAP.

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Make Sure You're Hard To Get...A Hold Of

Cover yourself in honey and give your crush a real challenge. Talk about hard to get! Alternatives include butter, Vaseline, jelly and bubble bath.

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Get Out Of Town

If your crush really wants you, they're gonna have to prove it. Move to another town, another state or another country and see if they follow you there because they can't handle being away from you.

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Duel To The Death

Lie to the person making moves on you and tell them that you already have an a significant other. If your crush means business they will try to steal you away from them. If they're not willing to have a straight up Wizarding duel for your heart at the very least, it ain't worth it.

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Send Anonymous Love Letters

Want to know the best way to play hard to get? Make sure that the object of your desire doesn't know who you are! Get creative and send anonymous messages! Use the notes to say everything from sweet nothing's to awesome cole slaw recipes you found online. Your crush's curiosity and love of summer BBQ staples will drive them crazy... With love! Or they'll call the cops, but let's go with love.

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Knock 'Em Out

You know how people say that boys are mean to girls that they have a crush on? Well, if should work the other way around too, right? But instead of just pulling hair as a flirtation tactic, why not go the fully monty and knock em out in an impromptu boxing match. Nothing says, "OMG Be Mine" like a flirty concussion.

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Deny Them Free Hugs

Wear a Free Hugs shirt or carry around a Free Hugs sign (because that is still super trendy to do, right? Right?). Once the object of your desire makes a move to get some free huggin, deny them but gladly accept a hug from someone else. Chances are they'll be so intrigued by your deliberate attempt to avoid them, that they'll just keep coming back for more.

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Hammertime Your Way To Love

Carry around an awesome 80s boom box wherever you go. Make sure that it has MC Hammer's classic single "U Can't Touch This" at the ready. Anytime your crush comes near you, be prepared to push play and lipsync, "Can't touch this!" Hammer dance away and leave your crush totally intrigued

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Tell 'Em They Stink

Pretend that your crush smells terrible every time they try to talk to you. This won't come across as rude or petty at all. They'll be so intrigued by your investment I'm their personal hygiene that they'll have to want you.

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Wear A Chastity Belt

Look, playing hard to get isn't easy, but nothing says hard to get like literally-hard-to-get-into-my-pants. It'll work wonders!

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Just Do Your Own Thing

Trying too hard is a disaster when it comes to getting somebody to like you. The best way to play hard to get is to play it cool and be yourself without looking too needy or using too many avoidance tactics. If you want somebody to be into you, go with the flow and don't pay too much attention to clever ruses. They rarely work anyway!

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Do you think playing hard to get works? What’s the best way to get your crush’s attention? Tell us in the comments!

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This week on the message boards, y’all are talking about signs that he likes you. There are a lot of ways to tell, so let’s see what you had to say first.

Nessinha said:
“It usually depends on the guy and his personality. In general you could try looking for these: – he looks at you a lot; maybe turns away when you catch him looking or holds your stare. sometimes he might just try not to look at you and it gets too obvious because he will look anywhere but directly at you – he smiles a lot at you or at the things you say – he teases you and makes fun of little things, but isn’t aggressive about it. – he may try to get your attention by talking louder and laughing a lot when you’re in view – he’ll find excuses to touch you or to get close to you in various occasions – his friends might look at you a lot too.”

MEEE888 said:
Look at his body language. When talking to him pay attention to his eyes if his pupils become bigger it means that they like what they see. Also, if you two are sitting next to each other look at his knees, if they are pointed towards you it means that he is interested in what you have to say. And with some guys when you see them with there hands in there pocket it is kind of an instinct, and they are basically pointing at their **yoohooo** if that makes sense to you in a way. If they seem to be bored, and this is kind of iffy, possibly not because they would be interested in anything you have to say.. If they make an effort to get to you then they could. But sometimes it could just mean that they are really friendly so don’t automatically assume.

sanvean17 said:
“If his girlfriend hates you.”

Okay, I wouldn’t say that if his girlfriend hates you it means that he likes you. And if he has a girlfriend, he’s off limits! I just had to address that.

Yes, there are a lot of ways to tell if a guy likes you! But mostly, it does depend on the guy. If a guy is going out of his way to talk to you and be around you, it’s a pretty safe bet that he’s interested. Body language can be a good identifier, but it’s not always accurate. Some guys are really touchy and others aren’t so you have to use your judgement.

Some guys are shy and might not give you a lot of signs that they like you, while other guys might be really flirtatious so it can be hard to tell. But from my experience, if he always wants to be around you, constantly talks to you (whether texting or otherwise) and always asks you to hang out, he’s into you.

And if he asks you out or makes a move, well then you know he likes you as more than a friend!

What do you think are signs that he likes you? Do you have any specific ways to tell? Tell us in the comments!
 

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I’ve gone through my share of breakups. With some, I relied heavily on ice cream. With others, I resorted to whole packs of Oreos at one time, which I have absolutely no shame about. Sometimes I watch sad movies, sometimes I try to empower myself with strong female leads. Every breakup is different, but they’re all tough.

It’s just hard to get over someone that you care about! But it can be done whether you have an emergency breakup kit or not. Regardless of how long it takes you to get over a breakup, you definitely go through several stages.

Let’s talk about the stages of getting over a breakup.

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Denial

You just don't even think the breakup is real. You think it's a really terrible dream and when you wake up tomorrow, everything will be back to normal.

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Confusion

The breakup just doesn't even make sense to you. Like...y'all were fine last week. It doesn't add up at all in your brain.

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What Is Wrong With Me?

You start thinking that something is horribly wrong with you and that no one will love you again ever for the rest of your life. You pick yourself apart and nag yourself for every single one of your flaws, no matter how small they are.

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Wallowing

You completely break down and post up in your room with tissues, Ben & Jerry's, movies about love and your dog. And you just cry and cry until you can't cry anymore. Or until you run out of ice cream.

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Anger

You finally move past sad and onto mad. You hate your ex and think about every stupid fight you had and how much he sucks.

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Relapse

But then you realize you miss your ex and his wonderful face and his soul and the way his lip curls up even when he's not smiling and then you want to crawl in a hole. I've totally never done this before...

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Girl Power

You surround yourself with your friends and vow that you don't need a guy! You need your friends and nail polish and girl-power movies like Legally Blonde.

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Moving On

You finally are able to get some closure and move past your ex. Whether you stay single for a while or start dating someone new, you're finally over the breakup and don't think about him 24/7.

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Have you been through these stages during a breakup? Are there any that you’d add to the list? Tell us in the comments!
 

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If there’s one thing girls can always bond about, it’s an embarrassing hookup story. Trust us: we all have them. So don’t be shy! Read this OMG reader hook-up confession, and then send your own to confession@gurl.com

One weekend, I went to visit my best friend at the college she was living at. She was trying to hook up with her crush and since I didn’t want to be a third wheel, she decided to set me up with one of her guy friends. The night we hung out, we were having a lot of fun – her guy friend who she was setting me up with was kind of shy, but he seemed pretty cool.

Towards the end of the night, we went to my BFF’s crush’s dorm room to hang out. After a little while, she started getting cozy on the couch with her crush. We started feeling a little awkward, so her guy friend took me into his room and we started to hook up. It got to the point where he had all of his clothes on, but all of mine were off (don’t ask me how that happened). Things were getting super heated when, out of nowhere, my best friend opened the door and walked in on me naked on top of him. He got really, really embarrassed and won’t talk to either of us anymore. And it’s not even like he was the one who was naked!

Do you think you can top this confession? Send your hook-up confessions to confession@gurl.com. Don’t worry: they’re totally anonymous.

Read more hilarious hookup confessions here!

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She was wearing leggings, a tank top and a flannel button down. For the record, it doesn’t matter what she was wearing. She could have been wearing a see through dress and that comment still would have been so completely out of line. The officer’s comments were so wrong and inappropriate.

Fortunately, the TSA and LAX authorities are working with Mr. and Mrs. Frauenfelder and launching an investigation due to this horrendously bad behavior. A friend, Maureen Herman, wrote a response on Facebook, “‘Cover up’ is a dangerous cultural attitude that fuels more than rude comments. It’s the foundation of the oppression of women, rape culture (‘she was asking for it’), and the drive for reproductive control of women’s bodies.”

The agent said “cover up” in regards to this outfit. Really? Source: Boing Boing

I couldn’t agree more. No matter what a woman wears, it does not give anyone the right to harass her or tell her to put on more clothes. It is a terribly dangerous attitude and quite frankly, it’s really annoying.

This weekend, I wore one of those American Apparel bodysuits that has a mesh insert with some flowy pants. It’s not any more revealing than many of my v-neck shirts or low cut tops. And yet when I wore that out, people felt the need to comment. While walking down the street I had men shouting “BOOBIES!” at me like they were small children who just discovered the word “boobs” for the first time. I had girls who were with their boyfriends mumble rude remarks under their breath as I walked by.

And you know what? I wasn’t “asking for it.” I wore an outfit that I felt great in and that is no reason for anyone to harass me for it. I, like this 15-year-old girl, wore outfits that we wanted to wear. She apparently was not wearing enough while I, according to a lot of gross guys I walked by, should have taken more off.

I am so sick of this kind of behavior. What someone wears is their choice. I have never yelled at a stranger regarding their fashion choices except to ask where they got their outfit because I really liked what they had on. Why do people believe they have the right to tell someone what they should or should not be wearing?

It’s disgusting that now, in 2013, I can’t walk down the street in an outfit that I love without someone making a comment. Or that in 2013, a 15-year-old girl is harassed by a supposed professional for her outfit.

What you wear is YOUR business and not anyone else’s. You are not “asking for it” and you do not need to “cover up.”

So the next time you put on an outfit and worry that people will say something about it, don’t change. If you like it, you should wear it. Period, end of story, BYE.
 
Do you think your outfit means you’re “asking for it”? Has someone ever told you to cover up? Tell us in the comments!
 

Here are some responses to street harassment that I crafted

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Do I think you should try to pregnant right now? No, no, no and no some more. Look, I know this probably isn’t the answer you wanted to get, but hear me out, okay?

I know I don’t know you, but I’m pretty confident in saying that at 15-years-old, you’re not ready to have a baby yet. Getting pregnant and having a child is a HUGE deal. Seriously, it’s a crazy big deal and it will change your life forever. I know that, at the moment, starting a family with your boyfriend seems kind of romantic and sweet, but trust me on this one: you should wait.

Being a teen mom is extremely, extremely difficult. High school is hard enough on it’s own – now imagine adding a baby into the mix! Babies, as adorable as they may be, require a lot of money and time – and when I say a lot, I really mean all of your money and time. Are you ready to fully commit your entire life to a tiny little person that needs all of your attention? Are you ready to get a few part-time jobs after school to save up the money for baby products, doctor visits and more? Forget about hanging with your friends, going to parties or having alone time with your BF. Once you have a baby, you won’t have time for anything but that baby – and work and school, of course.

Look, I get that you love your boyfriend and you two feel like you want to be together forever. But if you’re really going to be together forever, why rush things? Having a baby at your age may even actually ruin your relationship because of all of the extra responsibility and stress. It’s a lot to handle and it’s not easy. If you two are meant to be together forever, then give yourselves time to get to this point in your relationship. High school and college are your time to have fun, be carefree and hang with your friends. You should be focusing on yourselves right now, you shouldn’t be focusing on raising a tiny human.

I’m not trying to say that being a teen mom is the worst thing in the world. Getting pregnant at a young age happens to some people and while I’m sure those people don’t regret having their baby, I’m also sure that most of them wish they could have waited a few more years. Once you have a baby, you have to face a life full of a ton of responsibility. You kind of lose your youth and there’s no need to purposely do that when you could wait a few more years until you’re older and a little more settled and secure.

I’m seriously advising you not to go through with this. Give yourself some more time, please. Waiting is a decision you won’t regret.

take care,
Heather

What’s on your mind? Heather can help! Send her your question at heather@gurl.com

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The HappyPlayTime mascot!

There are a lot of amazing apps out there (my favorites are currently Candy Crush and Vine), but this new one just might be the best app I’ve ever heard of: it’s called HappyPlayTime and it’s about female masturbation. Yes, you read that right. HappyPlayTime is a masturbation app for girls, complete with games, info, facts and even lessons on how to masturbate. Was this app made for Gurl.com? Because, um, I feel like it was.

HappyPlayTime was created by designer Tina Gong in an effort to get rid of the stigma surrounding female masturbation. Because, as I’m sure you guys already know, female masturbation isn’t something that everyone talks about. While most dudes have no problem talking about how much they jerk off or letting other people know that they just rubbed one out, the same can’t be said for us ladies. TV shows and movies constantly reference guys masturbating or even show scenes of guys masturbating – but how often do they do the same with women? You rarely see that, just like you rarely hear anyone talking about women masturbating.

But, hello – we totally masturbate and we love it just as much as guys do! So why can’t we talk about it? Why is the subject of female masturbation so taboo? Tina Gong doesn’t understand either, which is why she created HappyPlayTime. As the website says, “Loving your body, in every way, is not a sin. No more shame, no more secrets. Happy is on a mission: to free the world from a silly social stigma.”

Tina made HappyPlayTime into a fun, lighthearted app purposely – she specifically did not want any discussion about female masturbation to become too serious. As Tina told Gamification.com, “Teaching an anatomy lesson with a mission to educate about female masturbation is too much of a serious topic when taught in the traditional education model.”

To give off a playful vibe, HappyPlayTime’s mascot is an adorable personification of a vagina (see it?). The whole app revolves around silly little games that are also masturbation techniques. For example, it shows you where the clitoris is and then instructs you to make little circles on it (check out the image below). At the end, you get a “fantastically funny and wacky climax,” according to Gamification. Seriously, why didn’t we think of this app first?

In general, HappyPlayTime makes masturbation fun and easy to talk about. Think about it – talking about masturbation in terms of an app doesn’t seem so scary, right? That was exactly Tina”s point, which I think makes total sense. As Tina explained to Gamification, “If users can pick up the game, play it, laugh and share it with their friends, then the inherent taboo surrounding the conversation about female masturbation has been lifted; you don’t need to bash your beliefs over the heads of your players in order to make a point. By representing the whole process around a lighthearted and comical character and games, the masturbation topic at hand is easier to discuss.”

Another really awesome thing about HappyPlayTime is that it offers up some seriously interesting masturbation facts. According to the infograph on the website, 44.4 percent of women started masturbating between the ages of 10-14-years-old. The infograph also points out that women who began masturbating during adolescence less arousal difficulties and more orgasms during sexual intercourse.

I think this app is really, really great. In fact, I haven’t been able to stop singing it’s praises all morning. As I’ve written about before, I was once terrified of masturbation because I thought it would send me to hell (true story). I know firsthand how taboo female masturbation can be and that’s sad. As we’ve pointed out a million times here on Gurl, masturbation is fun, it’s healthy, it’s normal and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with it. I’m all for anything that aims to make female masturbation less taboo, especially if it’s accompanied by a cute little vagina themed mascot.

Unfortunately, HappyPlayTime isn’t available to download just yet, but Tina is hoping for a summer release of an alpha version. In the meantime, you can subscribe to the newsletter to stay updated on what’s going on.

Are you planning on downloading HappyPlayTime when it’s available? Do you think this is a good or bad idea? Do you hate how taboo female masturbation is? Tell me in the comments!

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Check out what’s new on our boards! Right now, our girls are talking about if you’re the third wheel in a best friend triangle:

treblegirl3418 said:

“Since I moved to secondary school, I have been close friends with A and L. For the past three years A and L have been my closest friends.

Some background info: I don’t find it hard to make friends as I’m easy to talk to and am friends with pretty much everyone at school, but I do find it very hard to trust people and therefore never really develop trusting friendships etc. I am confident in my talents and abilities, but really shy and not confident in the whole trusting people with my feelings etc.

Since I have trust issues A and L are my closest friends but we are not very close (e.g. I don’t talk about my feelings or whatever with them, I just hang out with them most of the time). I have always known that A and L are best friends, and I’m not apart of that. But they lead me on all the time. Saying things like “Oh we are BFFs!” but then not inviting me out with them ever (in fact I have never been out with them anywhere before). What’s worse is that they have no shame or guilt when they talk about times when they have gone out in front of my face. I feel like they treat me as if I have no feelings (this is true because people have always used me for my brains as I get top marks in school and have been bullied and teased before). I have been the “third wheel” for the past three years because I never knew if I should say something or do something. I stood up to them once and they stopped talking to me for a whole week (just because I showed them that I can stand up for myself and won’t be used).

They don’t seem to realize that there even is a problem and don’t realize how they treat me (I heard them say to each other “Why don’t we ever invite her out with us?” and then brush it off)

I really don’t know if I should stand up to them, talk to them about it or just stop being friends with them. Please give me some advice. All advice is appreciated.”

Got something to add to this convo? Then go for it, girl! Let us know what you think right here.

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However, there are ways to fight constructively and then there are ways not to fight. But since arguing is all about getting heated and emotional, it can be difficult to keep your cool while yelling, screaming and/or crying. And even though you might not want to admit that you were wrong, you also might be making mistakes during a fight. Find out if you’re doing the wrong thing and check out these mistakes you can make during a fight with your BF:

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You Yell And Cry To Get Your Point Across

Like I said, it's easy to get emotional during a fight. But try not to resort to screaming and hysterically crying in order to get a point across. This is only going to make a fight worse because it's so dramatic. As hard as it may be, try to be mature and talk about things as calmly as possible. If you feel like you're about to explode, take a deep breath.

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You Don't Speak At All

On the flip side, maybe you shut down during an argument or when you're mad and you just don't say anything at all. This is not going to help you at all. Your partner isn't a mind-reader and so if you don't tell him what's wrong, he's not going to know that something is wrong or he's not going to know how to fix it. Speak your mind and don't be afraid to get a little confrontational.

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You Pick A Fight In Public

Fighting in public is the worst. No one likes to be involved in it and no one likes to watch it happen - it's awkward and embarrassing. If you're out with your man and he does something that makes you mad, wait until you're alone to say something (unless it's truly awful). Most people don't like this kind of drama and so picking a fight in the middle of a public place will just make them angry and start things off on the wrong foot. Plus, waiting for privacy may give you time to think things over and calm down.

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You Refuse To Listen

When you're fighting with someone, you need to give that person the chance to say their side of the story. Communication is key during an argument and if you refuse to hear what your partner has to say, you're not going to get anywhere. Plus, it's rude! You don't have to like what they're saying, but you should at least listen.

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You Don't Admit You're Wrong And Blame Him For Everything

I know how easy it is to be stubborn during a fight, trust me. I'm incredibly stubborn and it's gotten me into a lot of trouble. You need to realize that sometimes, yes, it's possible - you can be in the wrong. That's why you need to listen to your partner. If you did something wrong, admit, learn to apologize and move on.

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You Refuse To Compromise

Relationships are all about compromise. So, sometimes when you get in a fight, you need to compromise in order to solve it. Sometimes you might even have to just agree to disagree. Either way, don't always be so set on getting the outcome YOU want. If you're all about that, maybe you shouldn't be in a relationship right now.

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You Take All The Blame

There are plenty of times when a fight really isn't your fault, you have nothing to apologize for and he genuinely did something wrong that hurt you. In any fight, though, you should never take all of the blame. A lot of times I see girls ending fights by taking the blame because they just want it to be over - don't do that. If you deserve an apology, demand one. Sometimes you may be wrong but that doesn't mean you are all the time. Know when to step down and know when to stand up for yourself.

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You Don't Defend Yourself

Speaking of standing up for yourself! If your BF picks a fight with you and you did nothing wrong, or you think you did nothing wrong, you can and should defend yourself. You can say your side of the story and you shouldn't be afraid of him physically or verbally abusing you. Don't just stand there and let him see whatever he wants.

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You Bring Up Old Stuff

Did you guys just get in a fight because he forgot to call you back? Okay, you're fighting about that - don't start bringing up that thing you guys were arguing about six months ago. That fight happened and should have been resolved... if you decided to forgive him or whatever, don't bring it up again. This kind of thing is only going to make your fight longer and more dramatic.

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You Just Give Up

Fights stink and sometimes they can make us reconsider a relationship. But sometimes, a fight is just a fight and it isn't the end of the world. Not every single argument means that your relationship is over. Sometimes, it's worth fighting for and you just need to figure out a way to get through your issues.

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How often do you fight with your significant other? Do you make these mistakes? What mistakes did I miss? Tell me in the comments.

Your complete guide to getting in a friend fight

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