What To Do If You Think Someone Is Ghosting You

There are some tricky things to navigate in the minefield that is modern dating. Debating about swiping left or right, having to deal with dick pics, and figuring out coded text messages are just some of the challenges. Of course we cannot forget about ghosting.

I’m sure that ghosting has been going on since Ye Olden Times, but it has definitely become more of a thing in recent years thanks to social media and technology. So everyone is on the same page: Ghosting is when you’re connecting with someone and think things are going well then they seem to disappear because all forms of communication stop.

If things were going good with someone and now they’ve suddenly MIA, you might get a sneaky suspicion that you’re being ghosted. And you’re probably right. If you’re scratching your head about what to do next, here’s an action plan if suspect that someone is ghosting you:

Ensure That You're Actually Being Ghosted

In a lot of situations, it's pretty obvious what's going on when there are piles of unanswered texts filling a person's inbox. It's tempting to jump to conclusions, but don't do it just yet. For one thing, the other person could legitimately have an emergency situation. Someone could have stolen their phone, they could be super ill, they could have 16,000 assignments due, or they could have a family emergency. The chances aren't high, but don't rule it out. Give it time and a few more texts or calls to see if you get a response. If you don't, continue with the plan.

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Consider Carefully Whether This Person Really Deserves More Of Your Time

If you're 99.999 percent sure that you're being ghosted, consider whether this person is really worth your time. What they're doing right now is pretty callous and is pretty much never justified. So, would you actually want to continue seeing a person like this? Think carefully. Some people might feel that there was a special enough connection to say yes. No judgment, here. If you're not quite ready to throw it all away, proceed.

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Lay It Out On The Line

If you have feelings for the other person and you thought something was there, bring the big guns to the table. If you did something on the date that you're worried scared the ghoster off, address it. Now, is your time. You can even say that you know that you're being ghosted, but don't make it petty. You're a classy lady and you don't need to try to stoop to their level.

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Think About Your Next Actions Very Carefully

If you don't get a response, you might be tempted to send a bunch of messages calling them out for being a coward, jerk, and you-know-what. As tempting as it is, cease further communication with them. You've given them ample time, now go focus on someone worthy, like yourself. If they do respond, tread carefully. There is a chance that the ghosting could happen again.

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Do Not Blame Yourself

Girl, you did nothing wrong to justify someone ghosting you. Don't let anyone ever make you think that. This is really the other person's issue. Who knows, they might have relationship issues, trust issues, they might not like responding to texts when the temperature isn't precisely 77. It's their problem not yours, so let them deal with it.

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Try To See The Positive

I recognize that this might be hard. You're probably saying "What positives?* Right? And I know that you might be nursing a damaged ego. First, know that you're much better off without this person in your life. You wasted enough time with them discovering they're not right. Be happy that wasn't months or years. Secondly, know that you already have tons of amazing people in your life. And you're amazing.

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What’s the most painful thing about being ghosted? Let us know in the comments!


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