Prom is supposed to be a fun event where you get to dress up all fancy and have a great time with your friends. Unfortunately, there are some darker aspects of the event that you might have to deal with including drinking, drugs, and peer pressure. One of the cliches about prom is that is the *big night* where people decide to lose their virginity. Some people might end up doing it on prom night, but that doesn’t mean that everyone should. And the cliche should never be used as something to convince people to hook up.
If your bae has been hinting that prom night should be the night that you two should do the deed and you’re feeling pressured, here’s what to do.
Bae keeps talking about having sex on prom night but I’m not sure I want to…
Girl, if bae is expressing his/her feelings, you should be sharing yours. And you shouldn’t be ashamed about doing it. From the sounds of your “I’m not sure” it doesn’t sound like you’re ready to have sex. That’s perfectly fine. Everyone feels ready at different times and you shouldn’t feel pressured “to be ready” just because bae is. If you open up with bae, he/she should understand.
I want prom night to be special so I don’t want to upset my SO.
Prom night can be very special without sex. You don’t even need to go to a hotel for prom night to be special. There are so many things that can make the night special from the dinner to dancing to just being around bae with all of your friends. If you’ve ever been to prom when you were single, you probably thought the night was pretty special without hooking up.
I’m worried that if I tell bae, he/she might decide not to go to prom with me.
Relationships are about honesty and respect. If you’re honest with bae about not feeling ready to have sex and he/she cares about you, bae should respect your feelings and stop pressuring you. If your SO gets upset or makes threats, he/she is not worth your time. I know that it might be hard to hear, but trust me on this. It’s better that you find it out now as opposed to later. You deserve someone who you feel comfortable talking to, can express your feelings, and someone who will respect them.
What if bae keeps pressuring me?
Similar to what I just said, you deserve someone who values what you say and takes it to heart. It your SO is pestering you to have sex, he/she might be doing in the hopes that if you’re bugged enough, it will make you change your mind. Not cool. You should tell bae that all of this pressure isn’t helping and you would appreciate him/her stopping. If he/she doesn’t, you might want to seriously consider whether you should go to prom together and/or go to a hotel/somewhere else on prom night.
Anything else to think about?
Remember to go with your gut in these situations. If you’re unsure about whether to do something, there’s a reason why. Don’t ignore what your mind is telling you. If you want to still go with bae but want to avoid any pressured situations, you can consider skipping prom night entirely or doing a group thing with your friends.
Have you ever felt pressured by your significant other? Let us know in the comments!
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