7 Reasons You Shouldn’t Worry About Not Having A Boyfriend In High School

Contrary to what you might have been brainwashed to believe (shout out to every teen movie/TV show/book ever), not everyone is destined to have a significant other in high school. More importantly, it’s not even all that weird not to have one. While there’s pressure for everyone to have a special someone in high school–whether you’re into girls, guys, or any other gender identity)–this expectation is seen a lot more frequently in guy/girl relationships. I mean, I get it: the idea of someone liking you enough to want to be exclusive is obviously desirable, because it makes us feel desirable too. But then what does it mean when you’re a teenage girl who is making your way through the hell that is high school and you don’t end up having a boyfriend at some point along the way? Does that mean you’re not desirable? Does it mean that something must be wrong with you?

Nope, none of the above.

Look, a lot of my friends had at least one boyfriend in their high school careers. There were also a lot who didn’t, and they were and still are cool and totally normal. Hell, I didn’t have a boyfriend in high school. In fact, I was a late bloomer in that department all together and didn’t so much as kiss a guy until my teen years were over. Check out these seven reasons why you shouldn’t worry about not having a boyfriend in high school, because it honestly isn’t everything.

Honestly, None Of Those High School Relationships Are Going To Last

I know that those of you in a high school relationship (who are reading this article for whatever reason) are going to yell at me for this, but here it goes: High school relationships don't last. The ones that do either crash and burn by the first year of college, and the ones that actually become a long, loving marriage are serious rarities. This is just reality, okay? So honestly, that whole not-having-a-boyfriend-in-high-school thing? Not worth fretting over since it has such a high chance of ending anyway. If you're looking for something that might last longer, you're better off waiting until you're a little older anyway.


There's No Right Age To Have A Boyfriend

It's not like there's some omnipotent force in the universe that's like, "Yes, you must have at least one boyfriend by the time you're 17-years-old, or you're a total effing loser." There is literally no right age to have a boyfriend, period. It's not like you're an old hag if you're a senior in high school and haven't had a BF yet. Do you realize how many other people in your grade--hell, in your friend group--don't have boyfriends either? Are all of y'all a bunch of socially inept losers because of it? No. Your worth should never be determined by this nonsense.

Ghost World

High School boys Can Be Really Immature

This isn't to say that older guys can't be immature monsters, because they can be, and you'll probably find that out the hard way. But let's be real: High school guys have a lot to learn, and you're really just going to be one of many "tester" girlfriends they'll have over the years. In time, maybe they'll become more boyfriend material--and maybe you'll become more girlfriend material too--but in 10th grade? Um, naw. Your boyfriend probably still thinks porn sex is how sex should be IRL. Nuff said.


A Boyfriend Is Not A Reflection Of How Cool You Are...Period

It...really isn't. Someone isn't cool just because they have a boyfriend, and honestly? It's pretty immature to even see things that way. All kinds of different people--cool, uncool, everywhere in-between--have boyfriends, and same goes for people who don't have boyfriends. Your relationship status really isn't a reflection of you, and if you think that you're scoring cool points just because you have someone to take mushy BF/GF selfies with...grow up.

Just Another Girl On The . IRT

Having A Boyfriend Doesn't Mean You're Mature

Listen...think about that girl in fifth grade who got together with one of your classmates. They were, like, 11-years-old and deemed themselves boyfriend and girlfriend. Were they suddenly mature AF? No. Honestly, the same logic applies to high school aged people too. Deciding to be in a relationship isn't an inherently . mature decision to make, and you're not inherently more mature for making it. You're not immature just because you didn't decide to go steady with some dude.

Some Girls

Your Friendships Are More Important Right Now

I know this is cliche AF, but it's true: Lovers come and go, but friends are forever (hopefully). You should definitely prioritize your friendships right now instead of relationships. Assuming you don't go through some massive fallout, I assure you that you're going to look back at your high school friendships a lot more fondly than that boyfriend you had for three months in junior year.

My Mad Fat Diary

Having A BF Is More Fun When You're Older Anyway

No more having your mom drop you off on a date or sneaking around to hook up. When you're a young adult, in college, and generally out of your parents' hair, dating, relationships, hookups, relationships, etc, become a lot more fun and freeing. Don't feel weird about not having a boyfriend in high school when the real fun is yet to come.

Fresh Meat

You can follow the author, Ashley Reese, on Twitter or Instagram. Don’t worry, she doesn’t bite!

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