7 Things You Can Never Do If You Have Roommates

Unless you are a fabulously wealthy heiress with inherited homes in every major metropolis in the world, chances are pretty good that, at some point in your life, you are going to have to live with roommates. Well, technically, if you live with your mom and dad and maybe some siblings and some other satellite relatives, you’ve pretty much always had roommates. But living with roommate roommates is, obviously, pretty different–they aren’t in your family, so they don’t have to forgive you if you’re difficult to live with, and you have to learn how to adapt to their various quirks and living habits that differ from yours. And, of course, there is always a possibility that they will be more or less impossible to live with.

Many of us have a roommate horror story or two that we use to entertain our friends–you know, the person you lived with for one semester who never seemed to shower, or always invited people over to stay the night without checking with you first, or both–but it’s also possible that you have always suspected that you are or will one day become someone’s bad roommate story.

Here’s the good news–you won’t be. Or, at least, you won’t be as bad as some people’s roommates are, based on this Reddit thread I found recently on the worst roommates people have ever had. So, here are some of the very worst roommates that have ever existed, according to Reddit. Basically, as long as you do the exact opposite of what they did, you should be just fine. Check out what not to do here:


Refuse To Shower After Exercising

Do you like to exercise? That's cool! Fitness is great! Maybe just, uh, shower before you talk to your roommates again. Hcoolj said, that their worst roommate was named 'Joe.' There were three of us interns living in an Airbnb with the host over the summer. The other girl was awesome, but Joe..... he wasn't even mean or an inherently bad person, it was just all the little things added up. He would go on runs then come back home, stand right next to you, and breathe hard and sweat all over you (with his hand always on the wall so that his sweaty armpits were exposed) instead of going to take a shower. He had to be part of every single conversation, and if he didn't hear something you said (even if it wasn't even remotely directed at him but he was nearby) he would go 'HUH???'" Don't be Joe!

Image source: Getty

Don't Clean, Ever

This roommate horror story has everything--delayed rent payments, a lack of cleaning skills, and attempting to mow the lawn with a steak knife. Seriously. Darbyisadoll said, "She didn't pay rent/bills on time. Didn't clean. Her room was full of super gross old dishes (my dishes that we would run out of cause they were full of curdled milk in her room). After a summer of mowing the grass every time (with a push mower), I informed her that it was now her turn. The grass got super long and one day I come home to find her grabbing giant handfuls of grass and cutting it with a steak knife." So, uh, just pay your bills. And clean up occasionally.  And don't trim the grass with a steak knife. Follow these rules, and you should be just fine!

Image source: Getty

Don't Take Out The Trash

Need an easy way to score roommate points? Take out the trash. Queenfeen said, "I had five awful flatmates all at once. Second year at uni and living with my friends and I had to do all the cleaning, taking the bins out etc. They never helped me and they always acted like they were being bullied into doing things but I only got pissed cause they were useless. Once I refused to take the bins out and waited as long as I could to see if they would take it out. Over three weeks later and 4 bin bags full, I had to take them out even after asking each flatmate at least three or four times."

Image source: Getty

Set Early Alarms Without Waking Up

Another way to be a good roommate? Don't set "aspirational" alarms. You know, the alarms you set for 5 or 6 AM with the itnention of getting up and working out or studying when you know full well that you're going to press snooze until you absolutely have to get out of bed. tuanisg said, "Dorm roommate, she would set alarms every half hour starting at 5:30 AM and not get up until I did at 8 or so."  Don't do this.

Image source: Getty

Don't Manage Your Bedbugs

Notice some bugs in your bed? As in, like, bedbugs? If so, it would behoove you to do something about it! Bmoreisapunkrocktown said, "I've lived with a lot of roommates. But the absolute worst was a girl that made us Patient Zero in a campus-wife bedbug infestation. It went on for months, and she just spread them to a bunch of people because she ignored a doctor's advice that she had bedbugs." That is...rude, right?

Image source: Getty

Don't Be Sympathetic To Breakups

An easy way to be a good roommate is by having just a little bit of empathy. AtlasWontPutMeDown said, "My freshman year of college. She was an anti social junior. She wanted nothing to do with me. That's fine. I was barely in the room, she could have it. My boyfriend broke up worth me, and that same morning, she kicked me out of the room so she could sex her boyfriend. She kicked me out while I was wrapped in a blanket crying." Sounds like this roommate did not exactly have any empathy!

Image source: Getty

Spend A LOT Of Time Experimenting

College is a new experience for everyone, so it's normal for people to experiment a little with sex and partying. But you don't want to take it too far--for your own well-being, mostly, but also because it'll make you hard to live with. PrincessPeach90 said that their worst roommate experience was "Freshman year: she went to an all girls school, and her graduating class was 24. She partied hard, had VERY loud sex in our room (a few feet from where I slept), was awake at all hours smoking pot and eating loud crunchy snacks in bed. She ended up meeting a guy, and moving into his shared-house for most of the second semester." At least this one has a happy ending!

Image source: Getty

You can reach the author, Sara Hendricks, on Twitter and Instagram.

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