I don’t think it’s too much of reach to say that, if there is one insecurity that most people tend to have, chances are good that it has something to do with sex.
Sex can be intimidating when you first start having it (and for a while after that, TBH). Many people tend to think that sex is something that should be purely instinctual, so, when you first start having it and find that you’re not inherently amazing at it, and that sex itself may not even be that inherently enjoyable for you, it can be easy to feel like you’re doing something wrong. And, because of this, there is a lot of sex-related discourse on the internet. Recently, while doing some searches of my own, I found a few Reddit threads on what guys think makes a girl good in bed.
Now, before I get into this, I will say what I always say when writing these types of posts–you know, the “What Guys REALLY Think About X, Y, or Z”–which is: Who really cares what guys think, anyway? Most guys know almost nothing about almost everything! Besides, the guys who have the most to say about girls in bed are often…not exactly great in bed, themselves. And, of course, as long as you’re comfortable and having fun in while you’re having sex, you’re probably doing just great. Still, you can acknowledge all of this and still be interested, to a small or large degree, to what guys have to say. So, with that hefty grain of salt in mind, check out what these guys think what makes a girl awesome in bed:
When You Don't Try Too HardJust... have fun with it! LongWaysFromHome said, "Being fun. Seriously, have fun with it. Enjoy yourself, do what feels good and communicate with me a bit. Nothing is more dull than a session of just straight up thrusting to the same forced expression of arousal. I get it, you're turned on. Quit trying to look sexy and let's make this sloppy." 619shepard said,"I can't find the original article, but I read a great piece about how women self monitor their body in a way that men never do. We think about how our posture and positioning makes us look and we worry about slouching and fat rolls. This happens even during sex. Rather than actually being sexy many women try to perform sexy." This is easier said than done, of course, but it's still pretty good to keep in mind. Image source: Getty
Acting ConfidentPopsRacer said that their main thing is "Body confidence. If you have the body of a porn star, great, flaunt it. If you don't, awesome, flaunt it. He obviously thinks you're pretty great whatever you have. The hottest sex I've ever had was with women who weren't physically perfect but they were totally comfortable being naked. When they were on top and I was looking up at them they didn't try to cover up, they wanted me to see every inch of them. Walking to and from the bed before/after sex or wherever you do it wasn't a shy experience, it was a strut." Obviously, you shouldn't feel, like, expected to be super confident with your own body--that takes effort and time for a lot of people, and being told by some guy that your body is "perfect" no matter what probably isn't going to help you out all that much. Still, it's a pretty good reminder that, if you're already in bed with someone, they aren't going to be repulsed by your naked body. Chances are, they think it's pretty great. Own it! Image source: Getty
Showing EnthusiasmIf you're happy and enthusiastic to be sleeping with someone, show them! (Not happy and enthusiastic about sleeping with someone? Don't sleep with them!) DownVoteBecauseICare said, "All a girl has to do to be good in bed is to be into it. Don't just lay there and let me give it to you. That's boring and all it makes me want to do is finish. One of the things I love is when my wife wraps her legs around me." So, just try to do your best to make it clear that you're into what you're doing. Image source: Getty
Taking Things SlowGuys tend to get a bad rap for wanting to jump too quickly into full-on sexual intercourse without foreplay, but some girls need a reminder, too. Enthusiasm, foreplay and techniques. PhousQ15 said, "I met this girl who was boring in bed. She just kissed me and caressed my body briefly for about less than 2 minutes (no joking) and went straight down to the shaft. Taking it slow is not only men's application but it is also women's." So, take your time! It'll be better for both of you this way. Image source: Getty
Being As "Into It" As PossibleAre you really, really into having sex with this particular person? Let 'em know! TremroT said, "I love it when the girl acts like she craves it more than anything. She wants it and needs it and works to get it as much as possible." Noted! Image source: Getty
Sensual MassagesSideroller said, "seriously massages are the best. I just found out recently they really get me going and feel great obviously." So, before hooking up, try giving your partner a massage. (Definitely ask them to give you one, too.) Maybe that's all you'll do! Either way, it'll feel pretty good. Image source: Getty
Knowing What Your Partner Is IntoNeed some more...technical advice? One guy has it! Adga said, "Play with his balls/penis. MASSAGES. Run her fingers through his hair. Kiss him in places (lips, neck, chest). BLOWJOBS. Wrap her legs around him." Image source: Getty
CommunicatingAnd here is some technical advice from another guy. Hbthegreat said, "Be into it. Don't make me make every single move, Tell me what you want me to do. Make it spontaneous sometimes because me saying 'do you want to bang' every time stops being appealing. Take control and make me feel like I am 'wanted/desired' not just just there for the ride. Random unexpected BJs are a huge turn on. Bite /scratch/dig your nails in make things rough, it's more fun." Basically? Every guy is different! Just talk with your partner to see what they're into. Image source: Getty
Were you surprised by any of these answers? Which ones? Let us know in the comments!