6 Reasons You Could Be Sore Down There After Sex

If you are the kind of person who thinks about sex–as most of us tend to do from time to time–chances are good that, during these types of reveries, you focus on the good stuff. You know, the euphoria that goes along with orgasms and human contact and wanting someone and feeling wanted in return. Of course, when it comes to actually having sex IRL, you probably already know that sex is a bit more complicated than these fantasies allow. It can be messy, it can be awkward, and, sometimes, you might find that you end up feeling a little sore down there afterwards.

Of course, sex itself should never be outright painful (if you find that having sex pretty much always hurts for you, please go see a doctor), but it’s actually fairly common to experience some soreness and tenderness down there every now and then after doing it. And, in (most) cases, the soreness will go away on its own. Still, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to be educated on what might be causing it. So, check out these reasons why your vagina could be sore after sex:


The Penis Was Too Big

Not to be indelicate here, or anything, but have you checked on the size of your partner's penis (or whatever you're using for penetrative sex)? If the penis or sex toy that you're using is too large, it's possible that it could be causing some small tearing or burning sensations that you might not notice until afterwards. Of course, this doesn't mean that you're doomed to feel sore after sex forever. If you're using a sex toy, you can just go down a size.  And, if your penis-having partner jsut happens to be particularly well-endowed, make sure you spend a lot of time on foreplay and don't be afraid to use lube.

Image source: Getty

You're Using Something You're Allergic To Down There

If you consistently feel a little sore in your vagina, particularly after sex, it's possible that you're allergic to something that you've been using down there.  This doesn't have to be anything sex-related, either--it could be condoms, sure (maybe you have a latex allergy you donn't know about?), laundry detergent, soap, or anything else that comes into contact with your vagina is causing it some irritation. So, start paying attention to the things you're using to see if it makes a difference with your vaginal pain.

Image source: Getty

You Weren't Sufficiently Aroused

And, as a result, you weren't sufficiently lubricated. The solution? Spend more time on foreplay (and make sure that the foreplay you're doing is stuff you actually enjoy.) If you don't have enough lubrication in your vagina when you have sex, this can cause a lot of friction that might cause some pain during and after sex. If you know you're spending sufficient time on foreplay and you still don't feel super wet during sex, try adding some lube into the mix.

Image source: Getty

You Aren't Going Gently Enough At First

People often stress the importance of foreplay (as they should), but something that doesn't get discussed as much is being gentle when you start having sex. (Or, to put it in layman's terms, not ramming a penis or dildo all the way in the vagina as soon as the consent for penetration is given.)  You shouldn't think of sex as a totally static thing--you know, like, you're either having complete, penetrative sex or you're not. You'll probably need some time to adjust to whatever is going inside your vagina, so it's totally fine to guide your partner through it and let them know exactly how fast you want to take it.

Image source: Getty

You're Not Relaxed During Sex

Another factor that could be causing discomfort during and after sex is tension in your body. Basically, if your whole body is a little tensed up during sex, and you can never feel like you're completely into it, this is as good a sign as any that you aren't quite relaxed enough--which, as a result, could make you feel a little sore afterwards. So, try to consider why you're feeling anxious or tense about sex. It's possible that you just need to get out of your head and work on your mindfulness during sex. Or, it's possible that you aren't ready for sex in general yet. So, if you feel like you're not in the right headspace for sex, there's nothing wrong with taking a break and pausing until you feel like you're ready. (Or calling it quits for the night if yo're really not into it.)

Image source: Getty

You Have An Infection

If you're feeling a lot of discomfort after sex, and find that the discomfort lasts through the next day, too, it's possible that you could have some kind of infection. This could be anything from a yeast infection to bacterial vaginosis to an STI. (Having a vagina is hard!) Basically, if  your soreness lasts for a while, and you're experiencing symptoms that go along with some of the other things on this list, it's probably in your best interest to visit a doctor to see what's up.

Image source: Getty



Do you get sore after having sex? Do you have any tips for dealing with it? Let us know in the comments!

You can reach the author, Sara Hendricks, on Twitter and Instagram.

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