Out of all the different kinds of romantic relationships out there, I think that being friends with benefits has to be the most complicated. This is because it involves two people who are having sex (or making out and touching a lot), but not dating – and that leads to a ridiculous amount of problems. There are almost no friend with benefits relationships that run smoothly and end nicely – that’s not to say it never happens, because I’m sure it does. It’s just that, most of the time, someone ends up catching real feelings, while the other person never does. And that… sucks.
So how can you tell if your FWB is starting to like you as more than just a hookup buddy? There are lots of telltale signs out there, you just need to know what to pay attention to. After all, it can be hard to read those signs when you guys are already pretty affectionate and physical with each other – it can be tough to figure out when the line has been crossed, emotionally, at least. Whether you’re interested in pursuing something more serious or you just want to keep things casual, you should probably be able to have an idea of how this person feels about you. Here are a few signs your friend with benefits likes you in a serious relationship type of way… not just a sexy times type of way. Now all you have to do is figure out your feelings!
They Ask For Your Opinion About ThingsPay attention to how your FWB talks to you. Someone who is only interested in hooking up, nothing else, might be cordial and chatty sometimes, but in the end, your opinion doesn't totally matter to them (sorry!), especially about important stuff. If your FWB is asking for your opinion about things in their life, especially big things, that's a good sign that they value what you think and say, and they want to impress you. That could definitely mean that they like you as more than just someone they want to bone. Source: iStock
They Get Jealous When They See You Talking To Other PeopleThis one is tricky, because even someone who only wants to hook up with you could end up feeling jealous when your attention is on someone else. For example: I had a FWB thing going on with a guy once, and he would get very jealous if he saw me flirting with someone else... but he never wanted to get serious. So, why am I pointing this out? Because sometimes it can be a sign! See how this person reacts when you flirt with someone else. Do they just get jealous and make a move to show that they're hooking up with you and then let it go? Or do they seem genuinely upset, hurt, or angry? If they seem like they're actually really upset, they probably are, and that probably has a deeper meaning behind it. If they just get jealous to the point where they have to show the other person that you belong with them, and that's it, then it's just a control issue. Source: iStock
They Keep In Touch OftenA true FWB isn't really interested in your daily, mundane activities or how your morning was. They just want to hook up and have fun, no strings attached, easy sex, all that good stuff. But a FWB who has more serious feelings for you? They'll want to talk to you even if you're not naked together. If they text you often, that's a good sign. If they talk about other things besides, "so, when are you free?" that's a great sign. And if they text all the time? Even better! Source: iStock
They're There For You When You're UpsetHow does your FWB react when you're upset? If they're only interested in sex, they'll probably get a little uncomfortable or act distant. If they're into you, they'll be there for you to talk, to comfort you, and to just support you. Of course, your FWB could be a genuinely nice person who cares about you, just not in a romantic relationship type of way. So, this one is a little bit tricky too. But generally, you'll see the difference in the vibes. Source: iStock
You've Met and Hung Out With Their FriendsThis sign doesn't really count if you and your FWB have the same group of friends. But it does count if you two don't have any mutual friends. It's always a good sign to be introduced to someone's friends - especially if you hang out with all of them. That means that this person obviously sees you as someone who could be a little more permanent in their life. If they go out of their way to introduce you to their friends and you guys sometimes do group hangouts, they might like you as girlfriend potential. Source: iStock
You Guys Have Deep ConversationsIf your relationship is strictly about hooking up, then there probably isn't a lot of talking involved, aside from some polite conversation before and after. So, if you and this person are having deep conversations before or after hooking up, that's a good sign that something else is going on. If a guy is talking to you about intimate stuff, that means they feel comfortable opening up to you, which is usually a pretty big deal. It means even more if you guys sometimes hang out and just talk, and don't even hook up. Source: iStock
Neither Of You Are Seeing Other PeopleOne benefit of having an FWB is that you guys are also allowed to talk to and date other people - that's usually why two people choose to keep things casual, because they don't want to be tied down. So, if neither of you are seeing or talking to other people, that could be a sign that you don't really want to hang out with anyone else. I mean, if it's only been, like, a week or two, then it might not mean anything serious. But if it's been a few weeks or months and the other person hasn't even expressed interest in someone else, it could be because they only have eyes for you. Source: iStock
They Want To Do More Than Just Hook UpWhat do you guys do when you hang out? In a ~real~ friends with benefits relationship, you would hang out at odd times, hook up, and go your separate ways. If you guys are doing more than just making out, that could be a sign that more romantic feelings are there. This is especially true if they take you out on dates or ask you to hang out and specifically say they don't feel like doing anything sexual. Source: iStock