As the baby boomer generation slowly fades out and the millennial generation takes over, we have all noticed more ~internet discourse~ on how the latter are ruining the world. It seems like a new article or study comes out once a week that proclaims that millennials have destroyed something else that has been around forever because – gasp! – our interests as a society have collectively changed. So, the answer to whether or not you’re a millennial might technically be about what year you were born in (if you were born between 1981 and 1997, you’re a millennial!), but the answer to whether or not you’re a true millennial lies in your likes and dislikes.
A lot of the time, millennial research is written about with an air of disdain and vague anger. Like this post about how millennials are killing the over-priced, morally bankrupt diamond industry. Or this one about how we might make gambling less trendy. Or this one about how we’re over cereal. Never mind the fact that some of us are eschewing diamonds because we desperately need to save money because literally everything is expensive. Forget about the fact that gambling is an addiction that can literally ruin lives! And, hey, who cares about healthy breakfast options when millennials are killing sugary, over processed cereals?! It’s… ridiculous.
Of course, it’s not new for an older generation to look down upon a newer one, to complain about all of the changes and whine about how everything they once knew is fading away. It’s natural! But, as a millennial, I’m kind of sick of being told I’m “ruining” things that were never that great in the first place. Anyway. Here are a few signs you’re a true millennial. Welcome to the club!
1. You LOVE avocado toast (even more than you love houses).
Remember when millionaire Tim Gurner insinuated that millennials weren’t buying houses because we were spending all of our money on avocado toast? LOL same. Listen, first of all, avocado toast is delicious, and it isn’t our fault it’s overpriced AF. Second, millennials aren’t choosing not to buy a home because they are spending their money on avocados – they’re choosing not to own homes because most of them are already in a tremendous amount of student loan debt and because owning a home is expensive AF. Also, no offense, but the recession the boomers helped us land in really effed up our minds, so… not our fault.
2. You prefer healthier, interesting food.
Earlier this year, shareholders reported that millennials were killing chain restaurants like Applebee’s and TGI Fridays. These restaurants are PISSED because millennials aren’t interested in them. That’s probably because millennials like to eat food that tastes good and is somewhat healthy (or at least Instagrammable) from smaller, privately owned restaurants that look cool rather than waiting an hour to sit in crowded restaurant full of screaming kids that was created with families in mind. I mean, it makes sense. We enjoy quality food. Sorry.
3. You’d take wine over beer any day.
You may or may not have heard that millennials are slowly killing the beer industry. I find this a little hard to believe, but at the same time, it’s not shocking. Millennials are drinking more wine than ever before, and we’re also at a fun time in the food industry where there are lots of exciting cocktails. Why pick a beer over something that looks good and tastes awesome?
4. You don’t feel the need to buy unnecessary cleaning supplies.
So, studies show that millennials are killing the napkin industry because we’re buying paper towels instead. We also have no effing idea what fabric softener is (can someone tell me?) so we aren’t buying it. This is painted as a negative, but at the end of the day, it just means that we aren’t about to spend our money on unnecessary purchases. It’s smart, actually! Paper towels are sturdier than napkins and can do more, and are often cheaper. Fabric softener is a scam. We’re saving money!
5. You can’t help but love trendy fitness classes.
As an #influencer, I am VERY busy. My days are filled with taking pictures of smoothies, searching my name on Twitter, and trying to figure out which Snapchat filter makes me look the skinniest. This means that it's not always easy to stay #fit, but I try to get in a #workout in my #homegym every day…obviously couldn't do it without my fave pre-workout drink, @fittea!! Do you have a #homegym? What's your favorite kind of workout? #fittea #ad #spon
Market research has shown that millennials are way more interested than boutique fitness classes over joining gyms. If you find gyms boring and expensive, you’re a millennial! Seriously, though, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Gyms ARE overpriced, and they often don’t give enough bang for your buck. Trendy fitness classes are very overpriced also, but they reveal a truth about millennials: we like our exercise to be fun and exciting, not boring and repetitive. Maybe this will encourage gyms to, I don’t know, update their equipment?
6. You’re not in a rush to get married.
"I thought an hour ago that I loved you more than any woman has ever loved a man, but a half hour after that I knew that what I felt before was nothing compared to what I felt then. But ten minutes after that, I understood that my previous love was a puddle compared to the high seas before a storm.” • // William Goldman • The Princess Bride // • Fun fact: Adam and I like to read together. Or rather, I read aloud to him while he makes dinner or drives us somewhere or washes our cars. We've done this our entire marriage. We've made our way through dozens of books and are currently being charmed by The Princess Bride. We've all seen the movie, but have you read the book? It's a must! "Fencing. Fighting. Torture. Poison. True love. Hate. Revenge. Giants. Hunters. Bad man. Good men. Beautifulest ladies. Snakes. Spiders. Pain. Death. Brave men. Cowardly man. Strongest men. Chases. Escapes. Lies. Truths. Passion. Miracles." And hilarious. Go get it!
There was a recent article in Time magazine about how millennials want jobs and education over marriage and kids. If you’re a true millennial, you’ll read that and think, “Um, OBVIOUSLY.” Of course those are our priorities! How the hell are we supposed to focus on spending thousands of dollars on a wedding when we can’t even find a decently paying job?! Why are we getting made fun of for this???
7. You’re also not in a rush to have kids.
Zum Geburtstag gab es sogar Besuch von Tanti und bestbuddy ❤????? #birthdaygirl #birthdaycat #happybirthday #mycat #nephewlove #nephew #bestbuddy #catfriends #catlovers2121 #cuddletime #cuddling #tinkerbell #tabbylicious #pawparty #pawty #babyboy #meow #familytime #partytime #babies #littlebabies #bkh #allyouneed #familygoals #family #familycomesfirst
Millennials are also having kids at older ages too. This is probably because we’re working more, getting married later in life, and have a mentality where we’re more focused on ourselves. That’s not a bad thing! Who says you have to rush to have a kid if you aren’t ready?
8. You’d rather live home for a while to save money instead of moving out right away.
Do you love saving money? Do you not mind living at home with your parents? Then you’re a millennial. The rumors are true – we’re living at home for a longer period of time than other generations. To be fair, it’s not our fault these other generations helped to make it impossible to move out. But whatever!
9. You’re kind of over traditional values.
If you agree with the last two statements, then you aren’t as into traditional values as your parents or grandparents, and you’re officially a millennial. I’m a millennial, and my fiance and I bought a house together before we got engaged. Everyone older than us was like, “OMG what are you doing what is happening,” but no one our age seemed to care. My grandma kept saying things like, “Kids these days do things backwards” and my mom kept wondering if we’d ever get married, but, like, whatever. Do things on your own time! That’s the cool thing about being a millennial – there are less rules to follow.
10. You like to shop for unique pieces rather than standard department store stuff.
These velvet pillows just arrived from @primitivesbykathy So cozy soft! . . . #fashion #style #fashionaddict #fashiongram #fashionlover #fashiondaily #fashionista #shoes #lipsense #shadowsense #shoelover #shopsmall #shopthelook #purse #socks #watches #boutique #musthave #fall #styleguide #instafashion #ootd #womensstyle #shopfroufrou #getnoticed #girlboss #jewelry #jotd #beauty #boho
In case you haven’t heard, millennials are destroying department stores. So if you would prefer a small boutique or, like, Francesca’s over Macy’s… you’re a true millennial. Research has found that we’re less drawn to aspirational designer brands.
11. You work… a lot.
Despite the constant whining that millennials have a crappy work ethic and that we’re all lazy bums, the opposite is true: millennials work a lot, and we work hard. Part of this is because most of us grew up in a recession where we watched a lot of people lose their jobs and it freaked us out. Part of this is because we know how competitive the job market is and we know we could easily be pushed out if we don’t do a good job. And a big part of it is because of the internet and how often we are on it – it makes it almost impossible to escape from work.
12. You almost never watch regular TV anymore.
You would have to literally be living under a rock to not notice how we’re pulling away from cable TV. If you’re a true millennial, you prefer Netflix, Hulu, or some other streaming service to watching live television. This is because our streaming services are better. They’re cheaper, they’re faster, and they give us what we want when we want it.
13. You live in fear that your job will be snatched away from you.
Millennials grew up during a time of financial instability and watched many, many people lose their jobs. Now we are lucky if we can FIND a job in our chosen field, even if we have tons of experience. So, yeah… we’re kind of paranoid.
14. You’d rather splurge on a vacation than a designer item.
If you would rather save up to go on a vacation than save up to buy a $1,000 handbag, then you’re a millennial. Research has shown that millennials prefer to spend money on experiences rather than designer items, and honestly? That’s a good thing.
15. Phone calls make you super uncomfortable.
If you have a mini panic attack every time someone calls you, congratulations, you’re a millennial. It’s been determined that millennials are killing phone calls, and honestly, who could blame us? First of all, most of us grew up with access to texting and emails, so we’re a product of our childhood. Second, millennials are often dubbed as the anxious generation, and talking on the phone can be stressful. Third? We simply don’t have the time.
16. You get news from social media and the internet.
Last day on set #foodnetworkstar! First coffee, then #theskimm…. thx for the fun interview! #Repost @theskimm Mornings with the kitchen whisperer Giada De Laurentiis #UpWiththeSkimm #SkimmLife Name: @giadadelaurentiis Job: Chef and mother What time do you get up? When my puppy Bruno wakes me up around 5:30am. How many times do you snooze? None. Do you snore? No, but my cat Bella definitely does. What are three things you can't live without in the AM? An Americano with agave, brown rice with olive oil and salt, and lipstick. Do you have a pre-cooking show ritual? Lots of yoga. What's your fav takeout food? Chinese. Favorite line from theSkimm recently? “Never considered the question even a possibility…Now I’m thinking, oh” — Oprah, on the chances she – a very famous TV personality – could win a presidential election. Complete the sentence: Woke up like this: with a kiss from Jade.
If you read about the news on a website, social media, or an app, then you’re a true millennial. It does make me sad that we’re killing off newspapers and magazines, but then I think, would I rather easily read an article on my phone, or would I rather sit with a gigantic newspaper that stains my hands? You know what I mean?
17. Golf does not seem exciting to you.
Does the idea of gold make you want to fall asleep? Good news – you’re a millennial. We’re being blamed for killing the sport, but honestly? Maybe it’s just because it’s boring.
18. You’re really effing sick of the articles about how millennials are ruining everything when you low-key watched boomers ruin the country as they voted for Donald Trump.
No offense but y’all are literally ruining our country.
Are YOU a true millennial? What do you disagree with? Tell us in the comments!