Like most people, every time I scroll through Instagram, I am left with a few questions. These question are generally benign enough–things like, “That is a cute top. Where might I be able to purchase it for myself?”and “Why am I simultaneously entranced and repulsed by all of Glossier’s Instagram posts?”–and, in truth, the spiciest I’ll usually get is “Why am I still following this person?”
Sometimes, however, I see a photo of a couple. Not just any couple, but one that is in a moment that, for lack of a better term, feels deeply and troublingly intimate. Not, like, porn intimate, but close enough, so seeing it forces me to ask, “Who even took this?”
I do understand that self-timers exist. But many of the photos that concern me have such a precariously specific angle–like, one you can only get from dangling down from the ceiling and pointing a camera down at a copulating couple, Peeping Tom-Style–that I fear that they must have been taken by some poor, unwitting single accomplice. So, check out these relationship goals photos that are so steamy, so sensual, and so intimate, you will be forced to ask yourself, “What living person on this earth even took this?” And you know wanna know the scary thing? I still don’t know! Anyway, here they are:
1. Where is the camera?
2. Who is the photographer?
3. Why are they doing this?
4. Have they no shame?
5. Do they want us to suffer?
6. Must be nice:
7. This is wholesome. But. Who did take this?
8. In the boudoir???
9. Did she pass away?
10. Is this…a seance? Did the ghost take this?
11. This is TOO. SENSUAL:
12. Who is in this kitchen?
13. WHO is in the bathroom?
14. Ah. There they are:
What do you think of these pictures? Which one made you the most upset? Let us know in the comments!