7 Ways To Be More Comfortable Talking To Guys

Talking to guys can, frankly, suck. I mean, it’s not like they’re a totally different species or something. If you’re a girl who is friends with guys, you know that they’re easy enough to talk to, even at their most frustrating. But what about talking to guys that you’re, you know, potentially interested in? What if you want to talk to your crush or you just want to flirt a little bit and see what happens? Now that can be stressful. I mean, have you managed to talk to someone you’re interested in without getting a little flustered or tongue tied? If so, you’re one of the lucky ones. The rest of us mere mortals are too busy low key embarrassing ourselves.

But this doesn’t have to be your reality, dude. Sure, talking to someone you’re attracted to might never be easy, but it’s definitely possible to make the whole process a lot easier. Check out these seven ways to be more comfortable talking to guys. After following these steps, you’ll be surprised how much less afraid you’ll be the next time you run into that crush of yours.

Don't Try To Act Differently

You're probably rolling your eyes thinking, "Yeah, I know, just be yourself." While that's true--it'll serve you well--that's not the only reason why you shouldn't act differently around a guy you're into. One of the downsides to acting differently around a guy is the simple fact that it's easy to accidentally fall out of character. Getting caught in that lie is way worse than some guy potentially not being into the real you. Avoid the potential awkwardness of this at all costs.

My Mad Fat Diary

Talk About Something That You're Both Into

If you're making a move on someone you know to some extent, definitely stick to talking about a hobby or interest that you both have in common. It's really easy to get relaxed--even around someone you're trying to impress--when you can talk about something that you're passionate about. If you love indie rock and Kendrick Lamar, and you know this dude does too, talk about that! Don't pretend to know about something that you know your crush is into, but you know nothing about. Like, if they're into gaming and you don't know a damn thing about it...don't pretend to you do. Keep it real.


Go At It With A Crew

When in doubt, approach some boys with a little help from your friends. Invite your girlfriends to talk to some guys and have a fun, free flowing group convo. You'll feel less pressure to always keep the conversation going.

Dazed and Confused

Ease Into The Flirting

Don't lay it on thick too quickly, sis. I mean, do what you want, but it'll feel a lot less awkward going in for that flirty arm touch or a longing smile if you two break the ice with some casual conversation first.

Some Girls

Figure Out A Sneaky Way To Exchange Numbers

It can be scary to just straight up say, "Hey, can I have your number?" What you might want to do instead is find a clever way to exchange numbers that feels a little more seamless. Maybe you're talking about a TV show or some weird conspiracy theory you found online. If they're curious about it, offer to send them a link about it. It'll keep the conversation going and you'll exchange numbers super easily. And it won't come across as too thirsty.

Bye Bye Birdie

Remember: It's Just A Boy

I mean...at the end of the day...this is just a boy. A simple boy who isn't the most important person on the planet. Don't let some guy intimidate you or make you feel like a loser. Life is too short to get hung up on a boy...period. I know, easier said than done, but it's the truth! Imagine if your friend was fretting over talking to some guy. What advice would you give to her? Would you encourage her to freak the eff out? No, of course you wouldn't. You'd convince her that this guy--no matter how cool or interesting he is--is just a dude at the end of the day. Take that same approach.

Freaks and Geeks

Accept The Fact That It's Not Always Going To Go Somewhere

Not every guy you approach is going to be interested or responsive to your advances...and it's not because you're some gross slug from the bottom of the earth that no boy will ever want anything to do with ever. Don't sell yourself short! Just keep your chin up and try again with some other cute dude.


Are you nervous talking to guys? What do you do to help ease your worries? Tell us in the comments!

You can follow the author, Ashley Reese, on Twitter or Instagram. Don’t worry, she doesn’t bite!

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