The vagina can be a mysterious thing. This is partly because it’s a complicated and magical body part (seriously, what is more magical than something that can birth a tiny human?), and partly because most of us aren’t given a proper education about the vagina. During sex ed, we learn about the parts of our genitals that have to do with pregnancy, and we learn the basics of sex, but sex, but… that’s about it. We aren’t told about different size labia or the fact that discharge happens all the time, or even where something like our clitoris is. And honestly? If you want to have a satisfying, happy sex life, whether it’s with yourself or with a partner, you have to know where your clitoris is.
Think of your clitoris as a pleasure powerhouse. It’s the part of your genitals that is most likely going to help you have an orgasm – in fact, a big majority of women can only orgasm from having their clitoris stimulated. You can’t stimulate something if you have no idea where it is! Sure, you could blindly fumble around down there with your fingers or a sex toy, waiting to hit the magic button that makes things feel good, but that could take a while – some girls go years touching themselves down there without getting near their clitoris.
Of course, the clitoris is a little different for everyone. Some girls have a big clit, while others have a smaller one. Some girls are able to find theirs with no problem, and for other girls, it might be a little more hidden in the folds. The clitoris might be pretty defined for some girls, while others might need to get turned on to be able to locate it (it swells when you’re ~in the mood~). If you’re having trouble finding your clit, you are not alone, and there’s nothing to be ashamed of. You just need a little help! So, here are some tips on how to find your clitoris. Better orgasms await you!
Get A Better Idea Of Your AnatomyBefore you go searching for your clitoris, you need to have at least a rough idea of what's going on down there. Your clitoris should be located higher, closer to your belly button rather than your anus. If you think of your vag as a clock, then the clitoris would be in the 6 or 12 position. A drawing like this one can help you get a better idea of where it might be. It can also sometimes be a little hidden under skin, so you might need to move things around to find it. Source: Tumblr
Get To Know What It's About About and How It FeelsYour clitoris is often described as a "magic button," and it has been said it feels circular. But just because it seems small doesn't mean it is. It's bigger than you think because there's a lot of internal stuff going on. The glans clitoris is where you want to get to, but it can often be hidden, like I said. This is referred to as the clitoral hood, which is kind of like the foreskin of the clitoris. When you get turned on, the clitoral hood retracts to reveal the glans clitoris - for some people. It might need to be moved over in order to get to the glans clitoris. You'll probably know when you hit the clitoris because it will feel a little different. It's a little bit harder than anything else down there, although certainly not HARD. It feels like you're touching something, though, if that makes sense, not just skin. Source: iStock
Sit In Front Of A MirrorYou could lay on your back, staring at the ceiling and using only your fingers to try and locate your clitoris. Or, you could make things easier for yourself and open your legs in front of a mirror. This allows you to really see what's happening down there, which is especially helpful if you looked at the image before of your genitals. Source: iStock
Use Extra LightThings can get dark down there, even if it's the middle of the day. It's hard to bend your head forward enough to see everything, and some extra light could definitely be helpful if you're using a mirror to locate your clit. Use the flashlight on your phone, or just a regular flashlight to get the job done. Source: iStock
Stimulate It With Your FingersYou might find that, even after looking at the image of your vagina, you can't find your clitoris. If that's the case, don't freak out - a lot of women can't locate their clitoris unless they're aroused. When you're turned on, your clit swells, making it much easier to locate. For some women, the clitoral hood will retract, making it easier to find as well. So, if you're looking around down there without success, use your fingers to stimulate in the area you think the clit is, and try to get yourself turned on. Source: iStock
Use A Vibrator or LubeFingers not getting the job done? It's totally fine to use a sex toy like a vibrator or a dildo to get things going. You might also want to use lube. Your clitoris can be sensitive, and if you aren't turned on enough, moving your fingers down a lot down there can almost be a little painful because of the friction. Use some lube to make things easier. Source: iStock
Have Your Partner Help YouYou don't have to do this all by yourself! Get your partner to help you find your clit - it could be a really sexy form of foreplay or hooking up. Have them move their finger around while they look at things down there - they'll probably get a better view of it than you will. Source: iStock
Don't Get Stressed OutCan't find your clit on the first try? Chill out, relax, and try again later. It takes some women a lot of time to find their clitoris, so there isn't something wrong with you... it just might take some time to figure things out down there. Source: iStock
Did you find these tips helpful? Do you have trouble finding your clitoris? Let us know in the comments.