I’ll never forget the feeling of realizing an ex-boyfriend was about to dump me. Things had been great… until they weren’t. One day, he started to seem constantly annoyed with me. The texts and phone calls didn’t stop, and we still hung out a lot, but now it was usually with his friends. He would get angry with me really easily, and we fought too much. One day, I went on Facebook and saw he had left a really flirty comment on another girl’s photo, and I knew that was it. I confronted him, we argued a lot, and it ended with him breaking up with me. It sucked, and it especially sucked because I had seen the signs, but had chosen to do nothing about them.
If we’re honest with ourselves, we usually know the signs that we’re about to get dumped, especially the obvious ones – a lack of hooking up, flirting with other people, constantly being blown off. But sometimes those little signs can be confused with the signs that your relationship is moving past the honeymoon stage. Not texting as much? No big deal, that happens in a long-term relationship. Hangouts becoming more boring? Okay, that’s normal.. right? Maybe, but also maybe not. This Ask Reddit thread included real people talking about the signs they noticed before their partner broke up with them. If you want to try to warn yourself, check out these little signs you’re about to get dumped:
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Not Using Emojis When Texting
One sign that your partner is about to dump you is a change in their texting habits. User Whoreo2 says, "Not using emojis in texts (if there were any before) and less interest in texting in general." If they used to send you lots of cute texts full of emojis, or just lots of texts at all, and now you get almost nothing, that's a pretty good indication that something is going on. If this happens over a long period of time and there are other red flags, then you might be getting dumped soon.
Getting Weird About Their Phone
No one likes someone to look over their shoulder at their phone, but if your partner starts to get super weird about it, beware. User 2016throwaway0318 says, "secretive phone habits (shielding it from you when you're around, locking it when it's never been locked, sleeping with it under his pillow for the first time in your relationship, etc.) and just general behavioral changes." If he has nothing to hide, nothing will change. If he has something to hide, he'll suddenly make sure you're never near his phone. Source: iStock
They Don't Bring You Around Their Friends
If the relationship was going well, you would be around him and his friends all the time. If it starts going downhill, you might get shunned. User bluejay_way says, "Stopped inviting me to parties with him or to hang out with his friends." If your partner is thinking of breaking up with you, then chances are good that they want their friends by their side. So, they'll start hanging out with the more so they have people to lean on, and of course they wouldn't want you around. They might also do this for shadier reasons, like they're trying to hide you from someone, or they want alone time without you to talk to their friends about the situation. Source: iStock
They Start Being More Formal
What do I mean by "formal?" User jessinthebigcity says, "No longer calling me pet names, only talking about school assignments, and acting distracted, sitting far away from me when I was at his house." As a honeymoon stage ends, it's normal for two people to be less lovey-dovey and sappy. But if your partner starts to get REALLY distant, then watch out. Source: iStock
They Don't Ask About Your Day
If your partner loves and cares about you, they will ask about your day and listen when you respond. Or, they will just listen in general. If they stop asking, they aren't interested. User coconutcurrychicken says, "Seemingly uninterested in my day; things he'd normally be interested in." Source: iStock
They Seem Hostile and Annoyed
If your boyfriend goes from super sweet to always annoyed, bitter, and angry, it could be because they're annoyed with the relationship but they don't know how to end it User coconutcurrychicken says, "Undertones of hostility and disconnectedness coming from him." Source: iStock
They Stop Caring About Certain Things
User atonalnocturne says, "From a long term relationship (we had been living together for more than a year at that point): my partner stopped caring about how to decorate our apartment. We had been talking about getting prints for a specific room, but when I asked about buying them the response was 'Sure, I don't care really.' I remember being surprised at the time because my partner was REALLY insistent on making every decision together." This might not be your exact situation, but if you notice they no longer care about something they once REALLY cared about, that means they are't sure it's worth their time. Source: iStock
You Ask What's Wrong and They Say Nothing
If you get a gut feeling that something is wrong, chances good that something is wrong. Go ahead and ask, but if they blow it off really defensively, that could be a bad time. Whoreo2 says, "And then you start asking what's wrong and they deny everything, and then a couple days later you get dumped. It's always such a horrible feeling."