7 Things You Need To Know If You Are A Woman Who Has Sex

Are you a woman? (A girl?) Are you having sex? Like, right now? If so, put down the computer, you freak!

I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to kink shame you. For all I know, you and your partner can only be turned on by breaking out the ol’ family PC during your steamy lovemaking seshes. And that is just fine with me! But, if you are having sex right now, like right in this moment, I would advise that you stop doing that, and get out pen and paper. Afterwards, you can get back to it, but right now, you have some learning to do!

Basically, a lot of studies have been done on women and their sexuality over the past few years (which is ironic, in a sense, considering that most of women’s healthcare is in the process of being stripped away from many U.S. citizens, but that is another topic for another day!), and a lot of them cover ways in which having sex can be made significantly better for women.

So, check out these things that you should probably know if you are a human girl who has sex from time to time:


Heterosexual Women Orgasm Less Than Any Other Demographic  

If you are a heterosexual woman, and you have had sex before, you may have already suspected this. But, thanks to a study done by researchers from Chapman University, Indiana University, and the Kinsey Institute who studied 52,000 Americans of different genders and sexual orientations to see how orgasm frequency varies, we know it for sure. And the data? It's, uh, not encouraging. Apparently, women have fewer orgasms than men overall, with 95 percent of heterosexual men saying that they orgasm every time they have sex, but just 65 percent of heterosexual women saying the same thing. The good news? Odds are better if you're a lesbian (with an 86 percent success rate) or a bisexual woman (66 percent). So, basically, if you remove the man from the equation, you'll be okay.

Image source: Saturday Night Live

Three Things Improve Your Chance Of Having An Orgasm

So, statistically, women have a lower chance than men of having an orgasm. But this doesn't always have to be the case--a study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior earlier this year found that there is a "golden trio" of actions that can greatly increase the chances of orgasm for women, which include genital stimulation, deep kissing, and oral sex. All of which sounds pretty straightforward. So, if you need something else, you can try playing music, changing positions or (maybe?) saying "I love you," which are supposed to increase chances of orgasm by 20% for women.

Image source: When Harry Met Sally

Sex Is Painful For More Women Than You Probably Think

According to a study done in Great Britain earlier this year, nearly one in ten women experience pain during sex. This condition, which is called dyspareunia, affects all ages (this particular study focused on women from 16-74), but is most common among women in their late 50s and early 60s and women age 16-24. This is often due to physical issues, like lack of dryness during sex, but is also linked to mental ones, like anxiety.

Image source: Clueless

And Most Women Don't Speak Up About It

So, a lot of women feel pain during sex. So why don't people talk about it? According to a report from CNN last year, there's a lot of shame and taboo surrounding discomfort during sex. Most people think it's something that should feel good, and, since very few people talk about any pain they experience when having sex, most people think they're the only one. So, if something doesn't feel right (or feels straight-up painful) when you're having sex, don't be afraid to tell your partner to stop, and definitely don't feel weird or ashamed about seeing a doctor--you're far from the only person who's experiencing it.

Image source: Amelie

Women Want Sex More Than Most People Believe

If you've spent a lot of time on Gurl, this is probably a big "duh" to you. But, typically, men are depicted as having strong, intense sex drives, while women are seen as being more demure and only wanting sex if their partner does, too. in reality? That's BS. Research proves that women want sex just as much as men do--according to a study done in 2014, women actually think about sex more than men. So, if you're feeling weird about your sex drive, don't--whatever you're feeling is totally fine.

Image source: Sex And The city

Women Who Have More Sex Have Better Memories

Looking to improve your memory? You might just need to be having more sex--researchers at McGill University found that penile-vaginal intercourse can actually help women remember abstract words. This is because there is a link between sex and the growth of tissue in the hippocampus, which is the part of the brain that controls memory. So, if you want to work on your vocabulary, uh, this is a way to do it.

Image source: Clueless

Most Guys Don't Really Understand If You're Interested Or Not 

According to a study published in The Psychonomic Bulletin, Men tend not t be super aware of when someone is or isn't interested in them--or, more specifically, when they aren't interested in them. This study, which surveyed male and female college students on how they read physical and emotional cues, found that men tend not to take defensive or disinterested body language into account, instead, just project all of their interest onto the woman.

Image source: Offline Dating



Were you surprised by any of these studies? Which ones? Let us know in the comments!

You can reach the author, Sara Hendricks, on Twitter and Instagram.

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