When was the last time you had to block someone on the internet? If you’re a girl, or identify as one, chances are good that it was fairly recent. I recently had to block someone I knew vaguely in elementary school on Facebook because, for whatever reason, he spent two years sending me messages in which he asked me what I had been up to since sixth grade (fine), offered to find me a husband (weird), asked me to move in with him (very weird), and, finally, became very upset with me and called me some rude names when I stopped answering his messages (scary).
This did not feel good! But my experience is certainly not an isolated one–if you are a girl, and you have spent any time on the internet, chances are good that you have also received some similarly weird, unsolicited messages from guys. How do I know this? Most people have the foresight and generosity to screenshot and share any particularly unsettling messages they receive on the internet, and, most of the time, they are from guys to girls. So, check out these (terrible, awful, no-good) things you will understand, sadly, if you have ever talked to a boy online:
1. You know that boys always jump right into the important stuff:
2. You have grappled with the duality of man:
the duality of man pic.twitter.com/aze4Z9WZBg
— Lauren !? (@yer_grrl) May 8, 2017
3. You know that sometimes, it takes exactly 58 minutes for a man to get mad about someone not responding to him:
4. And sometimes even less than that:
5. You know that “milady” is the world’s biggest red flag:
6. You know that Facebook is a minefield:
7. Actually, nowhere is safe:
Sometimes I want to just throw my whole phone away pic.twitter.com/xvQgLniD3m
— Jahnell Anya (@JahnellAnya) March 28, 2017
8. Not even your Deviantart account:
9. Or the Yahtzee app:
11. No man on the internet will stop for anything on his way to call you a bitch:
12. Being impressed by a guy’s accomplishments will only make the inevitable disappointment you experience later that much more painful:
13. You never trust a man with a fish in his Tinder picture!
14. Or, for that matter, the random dudes who slide into your Instagram DMs:
i enjoy being alive but i don't know if this stranger on instagram respects that pic.twitter.com/qANssrqYTg
— Sara Hendricks (@shendrickslamar) April 1, 2017
15. You know that there is nothing like sexualizing a, um, dinosaur:
16. And, finally, you are…so tired:
Have you ever experienced anything similar to this? What was it like? Let us know in the comments!