15 Embarrassing Things That Can Happen When You’re Doing Butt Stuff

Butt stuff. Even just the name has you imagining some comical things. Don’t get me wrong, there is a lot of butt stuff that can be super hot, but stuff involving back there can also be awkward, painful, and weird. And sometimes it can be pretty embarrassing.

If you think that your vag can do unexpected things during sexy times, just you wait until you experience some awkward moments involving your butt. There is a reason why sexual acts involving butts feature so prominently in comedy. Of course, you probably won’t be laughing at the things when they happen to you. In those cases, you’ll probably want to bury your head in the sand like an ostrich.

If it makes you feel a bit better, know that you’re not the only one this happened to. And you definitely won’t be the last person. Embarrassing butt stuff is actually pretty common. However, a lot of us prefer to literally hide under the covers than talk about it. Here are Gurl, we’re down to talk about everything and anything. So, take a look at the 15 embarrassing things that can happen when you’re doing backdoor stuff.

1. You rip a massive one.

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It’s one of the most obvious things that can happen, but does that make it any less embarrassing? Nope.

 

2. You realize that your butthole isn’t as clean as you thought it was.

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CRINGE.

 

3. …Or you realize that bae’s crack isn’t as clean as you thought it would be.

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Ummm…how do you really bring this up in conversation?

 

4. You realize that your underwear definitely isn’t as pristine now as it was in the morning.

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Sigh. Note to self: Never buy light-colored underwear again.

 

5. You start gagging when you’re down in bae’s butt zone.

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I don’t even think anything is that funky, yet clearly my body thinks something is up…

 

6. You shed some butt hair randomly.

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WTF is that?! Please do not tell me that is a hairball made of butt hair.

 

7. The condom comes out not looking so clean.

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This definitely doesn’t happen during vaginal sex.

 

8. A bit of poo can come out.

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Okay, one of the big ~*urban legends*~ about anal is that it’ll make you poop. You’re probably not going to empty your entire bladder in the bed, but a bit of poop might come out. And surprise poo is almost always embarrassing.

 

9. Your butt queefs.

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Nope, not a fart. That was something else. And it’s just as embarrassing.

 

10. You put your finger in the wrong area.

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Sorry mate, I bet that one hurt.

 

11. You leave a skid mark on the sheets.

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*Dies* Who is going to have to clean this sexy mess up?!

 

12. You discover that you have something random caught in your butt crack.

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WTF?! How did that get there? And how did I not feel that? Seriously.

 

13. You end up with bae’s butt hair caught around your finger.

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Anyone have a tissue handy?

 

14. You realize that you really have to go.

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There is nothing graceful about booking it to the bathroom while squeezing your butt cheeks together like your life depends on it.

 

15. You start experiencing diarrhea symptoms.

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Never, ever having those bean burritos before doing butt stuff again.

 

Has something embarrassing ever happened to you during sex? Let us know in the comments!

You can follow the author, Heather Cichowski, on Twitter.

 

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