There is that often-quoted line about how breaking up is hard to do. While it’s typically applied to relationships of the romantic variety, it can also be applied to friendships. Whether you’re the one doing the dumping or you’re the one on the receiving end of the goodbye, friendship breakups are hard.
Breaking up with a friend can be as painful as breaking up with your SO. And sometimes, it’s even worse. You might have thought that you and your BFF were going to be together forever. You might have envisioned the two of you growing old and going gray together as you shared inside jokes, but that isn’t going to happen. As tough as a pill it is to swallow, it’s important to look beyond because there can actually be some good that comes out of friendship breakups.
Do I wish for any friendship breakups to happen? No, definitely not. If you’re going through one, though, try to remember that these are 15 important things you learn from ending a friendship and they will help you form better relationships in the future.
1. How to communicate.
Communication plays a big part in all relationships and it’s something that can make or break many a friendships. If communication was an issue in your friendship, you’ll hopefully have a better understanding of how to improve in the future.
2. How to put yourself first.
If you did the breaking up, you probably didn’t want to hurt your friend’s feelings, but at some point you realized that you had to say goodbye because it was the best thing for you. We can often forget about ourselves so reminders such as this are important.
3. What you actually want in a friendship.
Were there things in your relationship that you didn’t like? Were there things that you felt were lacking which is why the friendship went south? It took this not-so-good friendship to realize these important details so remember them.
4. How to face rejection.
I don’t want to upset anyone, but rejection is a part of life. It’s something we all have to deal with. Now that you’ve had to deal with it in your friendship, you’ll be better prepared to deal with it in other situations.
5. When to walk away from something.
One lesson that’s ingrained in us is seeing things through until the very end, but that doesn’t always apply. Sometimes, it’s actually better to walk away from something, as you’ve just discovered.
6. The importance of honesty.
You and your friend could have just continued on pretending everything was okay and grinning and baring it. Instead, you took action and ended things. You might not have realized it at the time, but this is a big lesson in being honest with other people and yourself.
7. What are deal breakers for you.
Everyone should have deal breakers for all kinds of relationships. You might not have had some before this relationship, but now you should hopefully have a clearer idea of what’s okay for your friendships and what definitely isn’t.
8. That things don’t always work out the way you intend them to.
Big life lesson right here. Remember this one, people.
9. What your weaknesses are.
You might not want to admit it to yourself, but you probably played a role in this friendship break up, too. If you have an open mind, you can reflect back on your relationship and figure out what things you did that might not have been the greatest. Don’t get upset about them; just focus on ways you can improve on them in the future.
10. What to look for in future friends.
Sometimes it takes a crappy relationship to realize what makes a good one. If you found your friend or your relationship was missing some key elements, be sure to look for those in future friends.
11. Not everyone gets along with everyone.
It’s a lesson you probably first discovered in Kindergarten, but it’s something that you might have forgotten about until now. Some people get on while others don’t. Period. Try to remember this one, especially when it comes to crushes.
12. Some people are not worth your time.
Your time is precious and when you give it to someone, they should appreciate it. It doesn’t matter who they are. Nuff said.
13. How to deal with exes.
Chances are you’re probably going to be seeing your ex-friend around and you’re probably going to have to interact at some point. You might be dreading this, but awkward ex interacting is a part of life. So, use this opportunity to hone your skills.
14. That there’s nothing wrong with being alone.
Don’t tsk, because it’s true. We can sometimes become so involved in relationships that when we’re actually alone, we think there’s something wrong with us. There’s not. And there are actually some brilliant things about being by yourself.
15. How to end a relationship.
It’s a bit of a depressing one, but rejecting people is something that you’re going to have to deal with again whether it’s from other friendships, romantic relationships, or even work.
What did you learn from breaking up with a friend? Let us know in the comments!
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