This is a true confession: it has taken me more years than I’m willing to admit to realize some people from high school were definitely interested in me. It’s totally obvious in hindsight, but I say that now that I know better. I was very clueless when it came to that type of thing, and maybe some of you are too. Luckily, there are real ways to tell if someone is checking you out. Not paying attention to the signs could mean you’re denying yourself some real happiness. People can be more obvious about their crushes than you think – some behaviors that seem normal or even make it seem like they aren’t interested are actually signs that they’re into you.
Now, it’s worth stating that there’s no way to know for sure if they’re attracted to you unless you start flirting with them and see if they flirt back. Figuring this out can be confusing. It can make you feel even more vulnerable and self conscious than you already do! Not cool. So, take it from someone who totally missed all the shots she didn’t take because she didn’t know she could take those damn shots in the first place *ugh*: these are 15 clear signs that someone is checking you out, even if you’re clueless and basically need someone to walk around with a flashing neon sign that says “I like you, this isn’t a joke and I’m not making fun of you, I mean it.” The struggle is real.
1) They just gave you a compliment that seems kind of random.
By random, I mean a compliment that isn’t, “You look so pretty today” or “I love your smile.” It would probably be about something small that most people wouldn’t notice right away. Example: Once, someone noticed a small freckle I had above my lip and gave a compliment about it. I thought it was weird, but I now realize it meant they had been staring at my lips for a while – which can only mean one thing. If they’re noticing the little things, it’s because they’re paying attention to you.
2) They hover in the hallway for no reason even though they should, in theory, just be walking through.
They’ve taken ten entire minutes to walk down this hallway you’re standing in. They’ll stop and take a drink of water, slow their pace, full-on reorganize their locker, make conversation with someone they don’t talk to, all to keep you in their sights.
3) They change where they are in a group or at a party so they can see you or be near you.
If you think someone is following you from room to room at a party, they probably are. Same for sitting at lunch, for example. Sitting across or next to you would be too obvious, but just enough so they have an excuse to glance back at you without it being weird? Perfect.
4) They put themselves in a prime position to get an alternate, or better view of you.
Thank you for opening the door for us and letting us walk up the stairs first. We, and our asses, have no idea what you’re doing.
5) They make whatever excuse to touch you.
You all know that cliche of the dude helping the girl with her swing while they’re golfing? It exists for a reason. They invent any kind of circumstance around why they need to be near you. Do you “have something on your face/hair” and they need to take care of it for you? Uh-huh. Cool.
6) They’re always showing off around you.
Yeah, this seems like an obvious tell someone is trying to impress you, but it’s also a sign they’re checking you out. Why else would they be showing off and being just that extra if not to check out your reaction to it? It’s still about you, everybody.
7) They snap their head back around once you walk past them.
Admittedly, there’s no way to tell other than to get someone else to vouch for the fact that this happened, or you, too, need to snap your head back around to check.
8) Suddenly, one person in their group of friends just looked your way. Then two more. Okay, now they’re taking shifts.
Especially if their friends know they like you, they’ll “subtly” gaze your way, as well. If you’re someone who gets made fun of in school (that was definitely me) it’s normal to be like “Ugh, I know what this is” and brace for the worst. But, it can also be a good thing! You never know.
9) Their gaze shifts.
It’s a small switch, but you’ll get good at catching it. It’s basically when, instead of looking at you like a normal person, their gaze goes a little softer. They might still be listening, but they might be thinking of something else. Probably something nice about you. This is usually paired with a tiny little smirk that they think isn’t obvious, but it totally is.
10) They literally can’t help but smile when they look at you.
Not in the way people tell you to smile when you’re into someone so you seem inviting. That can come off as performative. This is a natural, totally in spite of themselves smile.
11) They look somewhere other than your eyes when you talk, then look back.
Shout out to “watching someone’s lips when they talk because you’re thinking about kissing.”
12) Or they scan somewhere else on your body when they think you aren’t looking.
Shout out to dat ass, while we’re at it.
13) The less smooth version of this is when they zone out but are still focused on you or your body.
It’s honestly like they were checking you out, then forgot allllll about it, and let their train of thought run, leaving their body behind. Oops.
14) They lean in to talk to you.
Even when they technically don’t have to! This is an unconscious (on their part) tell that someone is checking you out since it’s more based on checking out your energy, for lack of a better word, and your reaction rather than something physical.
15) They keep checking you out.
One time, it could be an accident or they just noticed something and needed another look. “What does her shirt say?” is a different thought than “HER BOOBS THO.” So, if they repeat a behavior, it’s extremely likely they’re checking you out.
Are you clueless about things like this? How do you know when someone is checking you out? How can you be sure? Let us know in the comments!
You can follow the author, Aliee Chan, on Twitter.