8 Ways To Get Someone To Kiss You If You’re Shy AF

Sometimes getting someone to kiss you feels like a Jedi mind trick. It’s really hard, but unfortunately, there’s no Yoda to help you out. How do you get someone to do something you want them to do without actually initiating it? Welcome to life as a shy person who wants their crush to kiss them. Yes, in theory, we should all be able to bravely make the first move and plant a smooch on someone’s lips, but for some people, that’s not an option (or it doesn’t feel like one). It’s easy to feel helpless and dejected when you’re shy and trying to flirt. It’s fine if you don’t want to make a move – you don’t have to! – but then you should at least learn from tricks on how to give someone the green light to kiss you. After all, when you’re shy, it’s easy to accidentally give off vibes that you don’t want them to kiss you.

Don’t try stealing ideas from movies or TV, because the whole “Brrr, I’m so cold, give me your jacket please,” move is played out, and to be honest, spring is here so your days of cold weather are winding down. Getting someone else to kiss you is all about making sure that they know you won’t reject them if they try. On top of that, it’d help if they knew you were into them. If communicating that sounds overwhelming already, you aren’t alone. Luckily, it’s less of a big deal than you may think. There are some surefire ways to get someone to kiss you if you’re very shy. Try them out!

Hold Eye Contact A Few Moments After It Gets Uncomfortable

Eye contact is so, so important. The next time you're alone, look them in the eyes like you want to kiss them - just remember to smile so they don't think something weird is going on. Yes, this will most likely feel totally awkward, but the discomfort you're feeling is actually vulnerability, which is, coincidentally, a key part in getting close to someone physically or otherwise. Don't be afraid of the silence! The other person will probably want to fill that silence somehow... maybe by kissing you. No need to stare them down, but some meaningful soft-gaze will get you where you want to go.

Source: iStock

Be Obvious About The Compliments You Give Them

Anyone can tell them they look nice, but make sure they know the compliments are coming from you and that you mean them. Sometimes you need to be a little obvious, because not everyone's good at taking hints. Compliment them on their point of view if you're talking about something deep, compliment their hair and then run your hands through it, give yourself an excuse to re-notice something if you have to. Basically, say you like them and would like to kiss them by complimenting them on other things.

Source: iStock

Put Your Head On Their Shoulder

Age old trick: rest your head on their shoulder, let the moment build - you're already in the prime position to lightly touch them anyway - that way, when you want to kiss them, all you have to do is look up and see if they naturally turn their head towards yours. Your faces are going to be so close already, you may as well kiss! You can get physically closer to them while technically still being casual and not too intense and cheesy and put in minimal physical movement into making yourself totally kissable.

Source: iStock

Put Your Arm Around Them

That way they know you want to be close to them! If it's over their shoulders or waist, they might naturally put their arm around you as well. That way, you can feel the push and pull as to whether or not they want to be closer. It's similar to putting your head on their shoulder, but if that's too much for you, try this first. You can easily play with their hair or scratch their back from here which are all very obvious hints you want to kiss them, but if you do this first, you don't have to worry about jumping from zero to totally intense in two seconds.

Source: iStock

Let Them Catch You Checking Them Out

Here's how you play this: you check them out for long enough that they have to acknowledge it, "get caught," and break eye contact because you're SO SHY (lol), then once you recover, make eye contact again like "well, you caught me." If you're already shy to begin with, use it to your advantage. It can be really endearing that someone can make someone else feel really shy. Flip your flaw on it's head and turn it into part of what's charming about you. It gives them the green light to go ahead and maybe initiate without putting too much pressure on you to make a first move.

Source: iStock

Kiss Them Somewhere Else

Okay, don't lick them or anything, but kiss them on the cheek if you're going to say goodbye and they'll naturally turn towards your face if they want another. Or you can kiss their hand if you're holding hands already or kiss their shoulder if you're standing next to each other in line for movie tickets. If you're too shy to initiate a kiss on the lips, start by kissing them somewhere else. The other person then knows that you're totally down to kiss them (hello, you just did) and they'll be more inclined to follow through with a kiss-kiss.

Source: iStock

Stay Close When You Pull Away From A Hug

If you're used to being close to them but can't make the jump from hugging to sharing a kiss, don't totally jump your body away from them when you pull out from a hug. Keep the distance just that much closer (like, if you were going to be close and slow dance, but not all the way hug kind of close) and the moment will naturally progress (or not) from there. Physical closeness is the best way to hint that you'd like a kiss, so while you're there, you may as well use it to your advantage.

Source: iStock

Say How You're Feeling

A friend of mine always says "name it to tame it" and in this case, if you're feeling really shy, nervous, or your heart is beating out of your chest, it might be best to say it. It doesn't have to be awkward at all! Seriously. How does "I didn't think you'd make me this nervous" or "Feel my heart, it's going crazy right now" sound to you? Not so strange? If you say how you're feeling, you'll probably feel less so and also endear yourself to this person who has *such* a hold on how you feel. Who WOULDN'T want to kiss you at that point?

Source: iStock

What are your tips for getting someone to kiss you? Are you too shy to even think about this? Let us know in the comments!

You can follow the author, Aliee Chan, on Twitter.


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