You can get a spray tan, drink a gallon of water to de-bloat your body, exfoliate and moisturize every inch of skin, and wax all of your hair away…. and still hate the way you look naked. Despite what a lot of people think and say, the issue of low self-esteem isn’t just about looks, it’s more about how you feel. Physical changes can help for short periods of time, but to really feel better about how you look naked, or how you look in general, you have to change your mindset. It’s difficult and requires patience, but you can get there – and we’re here to help.
Of course, it’s totally normal to feel insecure about your naked body when you’re hooking up with someone, particularly someone new. But that doesn’t mean it’s okay, or that it’s something you shouldn’t attempt to change. I’ll be honest with you: being naked is my least favorite thing about a hookup. I struggle with this just as much as anyone else. If this isn’t an overnight fix, then how are you supposed to get rid of these negative feelings about yourself? There are some key things to keep in mind, and while feeling 100 percent happy with yourself might take some time, there are a few easier solutions that will work faster. If you’re anything like me, you definitely need these easy tips on how to feel better about how you look naked. Good luck!
Grab Some Naked Alone TimeJust casually walking around in your house naked might freak out your parents, so, uh, do't do that. But when you have time to be alone, whether it's right before you go to bed or before you get dressed for school, just hang out naked for a little while longer to get used to it. You're supposed to learn how to masturbate before you have sex, so the same rule kind of applies for being naked. Let yourself get used to the way your body looks without clothing. Sleep naked, hang out in your bathrobe a little while longer after a shower, do whatever feels just enough of a challenge and totally normal at the same time. Get used to your own naked body doing normal things you'd typically do clothed. The more you get used to how your body looks, moves, and feels, the less you'll freak out if you don't feel absolutely perfect.Source: iStock
Find At Least One Thing You Love About Your Naked BodyNo need to jump on the supremely confident and zero insecurity train right away. Start small. What's just one thing you like about how your body looks naked? It could be small, but you should genuinely like it for this to really work. That way, when you're naked and know you're about to have an insecurity attack, you can remember that one thing and lean into that instead of tipping towards feelings that make you feel awful. Just find one thing you don't think is awful and you'll have an easier time surviving naked-time.Source: iStock
Wear Clothes That Make You Feel Good About Your BodyIt's weird how clothes affect how you feel naked, but stay with me on this. Clothes can help you see the good things about your body because we all know a great outfit that you feel awesome in can do wonders for your self esteem. Clothes that fit and make you feel amazing will help you find confidence in how your body looks and realize that your insecurities only spring up in context. The body that looks great in high waisted jeans is the same body that's getting naked with someone you think is attractive. See? You'll be fine. Or fine-ish.Source: iStock
Get A Hobby That Makes You Get ActiveI'm not talking about getting active to lose weight (but, if that's something you're insecure about, this can definitely help give you peace of mind, just don't expect overnight results). What I'm talking about is you gaining confidence in your body's ability to do something else you think is cool. That way, your naked body is appreciated for more than just being sexual or only being used for pleasure, and it will help reorient your brain and your attitude towards your body. If you feel like a badass about your body in other ways, it's easy to translate it to feeling badass naked. Source: iStock
Do Things That Make You Feel SexyWhether it's part of your getting ready routine, certain music that lifts your confidence, or clothes you think you look hot in, find your version of what makes you feel like a goddess and find ways to incorporate that into your life, even when you aren't getting ready to go on a date. Find a version of sexiness that comes from you, not from what anyone else's idea of what sexy is. Making your own version of what's attractive is going to give you that confident comes-from-the-inside glow that will definitely make you feel awesome whether you're naked or clothed (but especially naked).Source: iStock
Remember The Person Hooking Up With You Wants To See You NakedThey literally signed up for this! They're super into whatever's going on with your body! So, don't question them or tell them that they're wrong about what they find attractive. What this person likes or doesn't like is none of your business, even if you personally don't like your body, so don't make it weird. Frequently, we're worried about what the other person thinks about our body. The good news here is that they're already on board, so you don't have anything to (technically) worry about! Try to remember this if you start to feel anxious.Source: iStock
If You're Hooking Up, Stay Focused On Your PartnerIf you find yourself getting in your own head when you're fooling around with someone, you can snap back into the present moment without getting self conscious if you just focus on what's going on, how good it feels, and what your partner's doing. If you think they're super attractive, focus on how hot you think they are instead of how weird and awkward you feel. Stay on them and what they're doing to/with you and you'll forget that you're naked to begin with. Not to mention, some of these feelings are impossible without at least a little nudity - I'm just saying.Source: iStock
Get A Sense Of Humor About The Weird Things Your Body DoesBodies are super weird, y'all! We bloat at the end of the day because your body literally needs to make space to hold your dinner and our boobs flop around during sex and we can't even control them if we tried. Now, let's get two bodies and smack them together and pretend that it *isn't* funny. Sex is funny! Our bodies are super strange sometimes! Taking it seriously and expecting flawless porn-level perfection every time is obviously going to set you up for some serious insecurity attacks. Instead, go into it knowing something silly is about to happen and that it's okay if you think your body is silly. Find the funny and you'll start to feel less pressure about being perfect.Source: iStock
Quit Comparing Your Body To CelebritiesPeople on TV, in magazines, and even Instagram models all have filters, professional Photoshop retouching, a very expensive personal trainer, and a hair and makeup squad to keep them looking the way you see them when they go out or post on social media. Why compare unless you too have that team in place to keep you looking amazing? Comparison is the root of most insecurities and feeling bad about how our bodies look naked, but we'll never match up because even they don't look like that sometimes. Every single person has insecurities, including celebrities. You aren't a celebrity, you're a person who's living their life, so why be hung up on this unrealistic standard of how you should look naked?Source: iStock
Don't Even Mention Your Insecurities Before, During, Or After You Hook UpKnow that no one sees your imperfections as intensely as you do. Only you know where you think your cellulite is the worst, where your body wobbles when you move, and which places you think look the worst. In fact, most people don't even know you have a zit unless you directly point it out (really). So, unless you want your next hook up to be all about how bad you feel, literally don't mention your hang ups about your naked body. Even if you want to jump out of your skin, you're actually making it worse if you try to avoid the parts of your body you don't like. Source: iStock
Are you confident in how you look when you’re naked? Or do you suddenly get self conscious? Do you have any tips of your own? Let us know in the comments!
You can follow the author, Aliee Chan, on Twitter.