Flirting is fun, but even too much of a good thing can still feel a little…much. A little much, in fact, to the point in which your crush might actually be annoyed by you and you wouldn’t know any better. We’ve all been there before and it sucks. Admittedly, it’s hard to keep it cool and flirt at the same time, but some people can take it too far. We all do it from time to time, so we can all benefit from learning these social cues that clearly mean that your crush is low-key annoyed by you.
This varies between person to person, so it’s usually less of a “this is annoying” thing and more of a “this person finds this particular behavior to be annoying” thing. The good news is that if you catch yourself in time, there’s still a good chance you can redeem yourself by shifting how you act in front of them, but if it’s too late, it might be time to move on. If you want help figuring out where you stand, or just how bad the situation is, these are 14 signs your crush is low-key annoyed by you.
1) They respond to your texts with one word answers.
You: write them carefully penned paragraphs on paragraphs. Very witty, just the right emojis that are also well placed, factual yet flirtatious.
Them: yea k.
Excuse me, what?! You’re putting in a ton of attention to detail and clearly care about communicating with them and they just don’t. They don’t participate in your conversations so much as they confirm receipt and that they’ve read it. They are deliberately not giving you anything to work with because they don’t want you to read into it. They’re literally doing the bare minimum on purpose.
2) They never initiate the conversation or engage in yours really.
This goes hand in hand with that last one. They listen to you because they aren’t trash, but if it feels like you’re talking to an auto-replying robot, well, you kind of are. You aren’t getting the funny, human version of them, they’re trying to dismiss you in as kind of a way as they possibly can.
3) Come to think of it, they don’t seek you out in social situations at all.
It’s more of a “you approaching them” kind of situation. Constantly. All the time. Without variation. They never reach out to you or approach you for conversation. This is probably because they don’t really want to talk to you – which is fine! People are allowed to not be interested, but maybe take a hint with this one?
4) They’ve yet to ask you anything personal about your life.
This is sure evidence that the care on this is pretty one-sided, don’t you think? You’re so invested in what they think, how they feel, and what they’re doing and they haven’t asked about you or how you feel yet. Once again, they’re being kind, but they aren’t actually interested, and they might be annoyed that you’re staying the course even though they’re not interested.
5) They can never hang out and they always have an iron-clad excuse.
The fact that they have practice isn’t enough, they have to include that this HUGE game is coming up and they’re needed and that they have to have dinner with their family afterwards because it’s very, very important and there’s no getting out of it. There’s no getting out of any plan they made that coincidentally conflicts with when you asked them to hang out. Interesting how your calendars are always in direct conflict and nothing is movable. Interesting. (Obviously, if they offer an alternate date, you’re good. If not? It’s probably time to move on.)
6) They scan the room instead of maintaining eye contact when you talk.
This means they’re looking for an out. Making constant eye contact is weird, but have you ever been in a situation where they scan the room behind you to see if there’s anyone approaching they can start a conversation with in order to get out of talking to you? The worst.
7) They avoid being alone with you at all costs.
Oh, you think you got them in a one-on-one? Nope it’s a surprise group thing now. Enjoy being ignored!
8) Or, even worse, they’re great one-on-one, but they straight up ignore you in a social situation.
These people are trash and this is the absolute worst. If someone is okay with you alone, but pretend they don’t even know you when their friends are around, they’re probably embarrassed to be seen with you in public, for whatever reason. This is their loss, not yours, since it signals that they’re more or less a fundamentally bad person.
9) You’re being a little needy.
You NEED them and only them to help with the notes from class when you were absent and if they don’t follow through, you’ll fall apart or suffer or something. It’s not endearing, it’s annoying. You basically invent problems for them to fix and it’s truly annoying. Would you like it if somebody was suddenly a little too dependent on you? My point exactly.
10) You honestly can’t tell if they’re being friendly because they’re friendly or if it’s because they feel bad.
You know when you’re being nice to someone because you feel bad versus when you actually want to hang out with them. If you’re wondering and have anxiety about this, it’s maybe time to consider the latter.
11) You’re unsure if you’re following them around a party or if they’re running from you.
Why do they keep moving around? Of course you want to be near them, but think about this dynamic. Are they literally running from you? Without literally running from you, of course. But, when you enter a room, do they find a really convenient way to exit almost immediately? If so, they’re probably a little annoyed by you.
12) They pretend not to hear you.
Whether it’s in conversations or they “didn’t get your text” or couldn’t reply because they were at work, they’re tuning you out because they’re annoyed. Truthfully, these things happen IRL when someone isn’t annoyed by you, but if it’s a constant recurrence, consider it a hint.
13) Instead of smiling when they catch you staring, they get visibly uncomfortable.
When you catch someone who has a crush on you looking at you, it’s sort of endearing. You just caught them in a private moment, they get startled, and you smile or wave to let them know it’s okay. Instead, with this person, they get tense and look anywhere but directly at you. You make them uncomfortable – not in a good way – and that can be annoying.
14) They’ve already rejected you… but you still keep going.
Girl, NOOOOOOO. Oh my god, drop it. Save your dignity. I don’t care if you think you two are ~meant to be~ you need to stop embarrassing yourself. Quit pursuing this person before you turn someone who isn’t interested in you romantically into someone who doesn’t like you as a person. Sorry if that’s harsh, but don’t worry about it–there are plenty of people out there for you.
Does your crush do any of these things? Do you do any of these things? Have you done anything that’s actually worse that annoyed a crush? Let us know in the comments!
You can follow the author, Aliee Chan, on Twitter.