If you have ever experienced the dubious honor of exchanging text messages with a human boy who lives on this earth, you will probably already know that it is one of the worst things that a person can experience. At its very best, you know that the true intentions of each party will be lost or diminished in some way–texting is a notoriously difficult communication medium if one is trying to get a real point across–and, at worst,’you might get a text like, uh, this:
It is a harrowing situation, to be sure, but not one that anyone should feel obligated to experience. The solution? Stop texting boys! I mean, you can text your elderly grandfather, I guess, and your dad if you need him to pick you up from soccer practice. But other than that? Don’t do it. If, for whatever reason, you are still texting boys, these real, awful (and real awful, heh heh heh heh heh) texts will probably make you want to stop:
2. Deep sigh:
3. Get those receipts!!!
7. Death by monotony:
10. Doesn’t this make you feel so full of rage?
11. Is a fire not burning in your belly (and not in, like, a sex way)?
15. And, finally…the clapbacks:
What do you think of these texts? Do they burn you to your very core, as they do with me? Let us know in comments!