We’re all a bunch of liars. In fact, according to a 2002 study, 60 percent of adults can’t talk for 10 minutes without letting at least one lie slip; most of those who lied did it about three times. Three lies, in ten minutes! But let’s not act too scandalized. How many of you have stretched the truth when you’re telling a story? How many of you regularly tell white lies? Lies aren’t always malicious, of course. Sometimes we lie to seem more relatable to someone, like pretending we know a band we’ve never heard of. Or maybe we lie to help ourselves avoid trouble, like telling your parents that you’re going to your best friend’s house when you’re really going to hook up with bae.
But there’s a difference in lying about turning in your English paper on time, and lying about sliding into someone’s DMs when you already have a S.O. They can both lead to nasty consequences, but the latter is going to leave you in an emotional hell hole if you uncover the truth. When we suspect that someone we care about is lying right to our faces, it can be hard to prove…unless you know what to look for.
You don’t need a lie detector test, you just need to be a little more observant and a little sneaky. Trust, none of us are as good at lying as we think we are, but if you want to increase your chances of catching a BF or a bestie in a lie, check out these 11 ways to tell if someone is lying their butt off.
There's A Disconnect Between Their Words And Body LanguageSometimes, the body really betrays itself. This is wild, but it's true: There are plenty of recorded incidents of people trying to convince someone of something, even going as far as to say "yes, this is what happened," but they're shaking their head in a "no" gesture while they're doing it! Isn't that nuts? Be on the lookout for disconnect between someone's actions and their words! This can even include someone trying to make their voice sound lighthearted and chill while their expression is angry and tense. Clueless
They Go Into A Little TOO Much DetailWe've ALL been guilty of this. When we're embellishing the truth or straight up lying, we'll try to make ourselves sound more legit by getting super detailed because we think that that'll make us more believable. In actuality, you're really just making things up as you go along. and...it's a lot more obvious than you might think. So if you suspect bae did something sketchy, be on the lookout for him to enthusiastically give you a little too much detail, especially if he's usually not a stickler for details in the first place. My So-Called Life
They Stumble Over Their WordsWe all get tongue tied, but we're a lot more likely to trip up when we're caught in a lie. Ask simple, easy to answer questions that are a tad bit prying; if their response includes some odd stutters or word stumbles, be on high alert, especially if this person is usually pretty calm, cool, and collected when they talk. Submarine
They Start To FidgetThis is one of the most obvious indicators that something is off: Fidgeting. This can include anything from grooming behaviors like running a hand through the hair or straightening out their clothes; maybe even becoming preoccupied with the hem of their shirt or a scratch behind the neck. Also, be on the lookout for what someone does with their face; maybe they'll suddenly get an urge to pull on their ear or bite their lip. Again, only spot behavior that is out of the ordinary; if your friend or partner is a nail biter, the fact that they're biting their nails isn't really a good sign that they're lying. Pretty In Pink
Their Smiles Seem A Bit OffSmiles can be such a big giveaway. If your partner is smiling while telling what you suspect might be a lie, check to see if that smile is reaching their eyes; genuine smiles do, fake ones, a little less often, especially for an inexperienced liar. Also, while some people smile out of nervousness, some smile--sometimes even super briefly--when out of deceit. For example, when one anticipates pulling off a really good lie (or right after they did it!), you might catch a quirk of a smile. Keep your eyes peeled, sis. Dazed And Confused
They Use A Lot Of Noncommittal Words And Phrases To Displace Any BlameIt's hard to spot a lie via text, but this can actually be a good indicator IRL and otherwise. See whether or not bae uses a lot more noncommittal words and phrases than usual, like "well maybe" or "I guess I." This might seem nonchalant, but it's mostly a way to make them look less culpable of potentially sus behavior. Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
They Make A Bunch Of 'We' StatementsThis is another one that you can pick up on via text. Watch for whether your bae (or even your BFF) starts to retell a story and changes what would normally be an "I" statement into a "we" statement. Let's say you suspect your bae and his boys got up to some sketchy behavior. What would normally be an "I got drunk" statement turns into "we got drunk." This isn't necessarily proof of a lie, but it's a sign that you need to be careful about what he's been saying. This is a subconscious way for him to deflect blame. Jawbreaker
They Have Trouble Retelling Their Story In Slightly Unconventional WaysThis can be a clever little trick if you suspect that your partner is lying about something: Get them to tell a story in an unconventional way. Let's say you figure your BF is lying about going somewhere with his crew. Find out how to get him to recount the night's events starting backwards (from the end of the night to the beginning) instead of from start to finish. "Oh, who dropped you off? What did you do right before that? Did you eat first?" Just make sure you're not obviously interrogating him or else he'll suspect that something weird is going on; stay as casual as possible and watch for any odd behavior or slip ups. Skins
Their Eyes Exhibit Some Unusual BehaviorYes, it's hard to look someone straight in the eye when you're lying, so you should be on the lookout for that. But warning: There are folks out there who are very good liars and can do it while looking you dead in the eye, so you can't rely on that to give you answers. But there are other eye gestures that can tip you off, like blinking more than usual or closing the eyes while trying to explain themselves. Fresh Meat
Their Confidence Falters The Longer You TalkSuspect that you're about to catch bae in a lie? Don't give up on the convo, keep it going. If they seem calm, cool, and collected at first, they might not a little later. When their mask of confidence falters and they express irritation, stumble over words, fidget, etc, you might be close to a confession. Grease
They're Acting Out Of The Ordinary In GeneralRemember, you can't use any of these skills properly if you don't understand what behavior is out of the ordinary for someone and what isn't. Body language isn’t fool proof because everyone is an individual and reacts to things differently. But it's a fair place to start, and it never hurts to be a little more aware of someone's unique quirks and behavior so you know when they deviate from it. Lizzie McGuire
Anything surprising? Do you lie more than you’d like to? Tell us in the comments!