Things were going so well. You and bae were snuggling, you felt a big spark, and he/she was totally giving you those I-want-to-kiss-you eyes. So, you when it for a kiss…and then you end up totally getting shut down. Oh, man. Even just writing about it makes my cheeks go a bit pink with embarrassment.
Unfortunately, most of us are going to have to deal with being rejected for a kiss at some point. Sometimes we might be the ones doing the rejecting while other times it’s us feeling the cold sharp pain of bae not being into it. It sucks no matter what side you’re on. What happens next will always be awkward, but it doesn’t have to be that bad.
If you went in for a smooch and your crush totally wasn’t into it, what you do next is important. These are the things that will help you recover after you’ve been rejected.
Do Not BailYes, I know it's tempting to grab your coat and run far, far way. You probably want some space to handle your emotions privately. Plus, you're probably worried that you're going to mess things up with your crush even more. No matter what you're thinking, stay put. You're going to have to confront things sooner or later and it's better to do it now. Image source: iStock
Do Not Go AWOLAs soon as your crush gives you the cheek, do you have visions of yourself deleting his/her number from your phone and unfollowing him/her? Hold up. Being rejected for a kiss isn't necessarily going to cost you the relationship, especially if you had something before. Ghosting your crush is a lot likelier to end things so if he/she is talking, answer! Image source: iStock
Talk It OutIt's tempting to pretend that this situation never happened, but you can't really do that. You're going to need to bring it up. Bite the bullet and try to discuss it now, right after the moment so you both can clearly remember how you're feeling. Image source: iStock
Humor Can WorkIf you're the one who's rejecting someone, using humor can increase the pain. However, if you're the one who got rejected, some humor can work to your advantage. I know that you probably don't feel like being funny in this situation, but even just one witty line can break the ice and help bae to open up. Even just try saying something like, "Was it the garlic from dinner?" can help put you both at ease so you can discuss what happened. Image source: iStock
Don't Get DramaticWhen you put yourself out there and you get rejected, it stings. I know that, you know that, and hopefully your crush knows that. You might want to cry, yell, or do both, but try and control yourself. Take a few deep breaths and try and clear your head before you do anything rash. Image source: iStock
Let Your Crush Know You Don't Want To Push Him/HerThere's obviously a reason your crush didn't want to kiss you. It could be a number of things, but the likely culprits are your crush isn't into you like that, or he/she isn't ready. To put things back on track, let your crush know that you didn't mean to rush things and you can take it slow. If he/she really isn't ready for kissing yet, he/she will feel a lot better that you're understanding. Image source: iStock
Do Not Bring Up Other PeopleNo, this rejected kiss probably has nothing to do with that random girl you and bae saw earlier. It also probably doesn't have anything to do with your crush's ex. Unless your crush explicitly brings up their past relationships in the situation, do not do it yourself. Image source: iStock
Avoid Bringing Up The Confusing SignalsYeah, I get that your crush totally had the kissing vibe, but he/she might not realize he/she did. Or maybe that was his/her *let's continue to snuggle* face. Everyone is different. If you start saying that you went in for the kiss because your crush looked like he/she wanted it, it can seem like you're blaming him/her for something, and that don't going to help at all. Image source: iStock
Allow Bae Some SpaceIf bae admits to being confused about the relationship, ask if he/she would like some space so he/she can sort out his/her feelings. Some people need space to get their heads straight. Just remember that when bae starts talking again, you don't play the sulking game. Image source: iStock
Don't Hold A GrudgeBae obviously had a valid reason at the time for not being ready to kiss so don't hold it against him/her. If you're continuing your relationship, do not give him/her the cold shoulder the next time he/she is giving you a kiss to "get even." That's not cool. Image source: iStock
Have you ever been rejected for a kiss? Let us know in the comments!
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