8 Signs You And Bae Could Be Better Off As Friends

One of the things that makes me scratch my head is when I hear about couples who I think are soooooo perfect for each other, but I find out that they’ve split up because “they’ve decided that they would make better friends.” It doesn’t matter whether it’s people I actually know or celebrities, I still have a tough time figuring out why they didn’t think their romantic relationship was as good as what it looked like.

Deciding that you and bae would make better friends than boyfriend/girlfriend is something that can be difficult for others to understand unless you’ve been in the situation. While a relationship might look like it’s the perfect romance from the outside, in private it could be a completely different thing. When you stop and think about it, your best friend and your SO probably have many of the same qualities. They’re probably caring, respectful, funny, and entertaining, so you can see why bae could actually make a great friend. It’s also why some people consider their boyfriend/girlfriends to also be their best friends. And it’s also why people decide to put bae in the friend zone.

Every relationship is different. You might have a best friend and bae, or you might have multiple best friends and a bae. Or bae could be your best buddy, too. It’s up to you to decide what situation works best for you and your SO. If you’re thinking that you and bae should simply be friends, these are the signs that you and bae could be better off as friends.

You Feel Pressured By What Other People Think

How many people have told you and bae that you're the perfect couple? And how many of them are envious about the two of you because you have so much in common? Even if you think that you're tuning all of that stuff out, it can impact you on a subconscious level and get you thinking that this is the relationship for you, but you don't see it. Bottom line: You're the one in the relationship, so if you feel like something is off, get to the bottom of it.

Image source: iStock

You Don't Have A Strong Romantic Connection

Do you feel like you're super close with bae, but it's not really in a romantic sense? Would you say that bae is the kind of person who understands everything about you, but you won't exactly say that your relationship has lots of hot, steamy chemistry? Some romantic relationships do have more of that passion than others, but if you find that your relationship hardly has any, bae could be better off as strictly a friend.

Image source: iStock

You're More Comfortable Chilling Than Going Out

Most people would say that they feel better when they're rocking sweatpants and watching Netflix than going out to a dinner date. However, if you feel that any time you're in a *proper* dating or romantic situation, you both feel uncomfortable and not like your regular selves, it could be because this really isn't a romantic relationship.

Image source: iStock

You've Got Different Relationship Goals

Do you and bae see eye to eye on pretty much everything, save for exactly where you'd like this romantic relationship to go? Don't ignore it because it will eventually lead to problems. If you don't see anyone compromising or changing what they want, you might want to see if you'd be on the same page as friends.

Image source: iStock

You Feel Terrible About The Thought Of Leaving

Have you considered ending the relationship, but you've stayed because you don't want to hurt bae's feelings? Those feelings could be because you're friends with bae and you don't want to see your friend get hurt. It's time to consider how you really feel about bae and whether you actually feel love, or whether you're more concerned with protecting your SO.

Image source: iStock

You Still Find That You're Horny

...and you're not necessarily looking for bae. While everyone in any relationship will probably feel a bit of desire for another person at some point, you have to ask yourself how often you feel desire for bae. It's natural if it has gone down a bit over time. However, if you find that bae just doesn't set your pulses racing, you might want to keep bae as a friend and find someone you do feel that spark for.

Image source: iStock

You Find Yourself Wanting More

Do you love everything about bae, but do you often think that there's something missing from your relationship yet you cannot quite figure out what it is? Even if you cannot figure it out completely, it's probably a good idea to go with what your gut and/or heart are telling you.

Image source: iStock

You Feel Guilty In The Relationship

There are different reasons to feel guilty in a relationship. If you find that you're feeling guilty because you don't have the feelings you thought you would for bae, you're missing a spark, or bae has stronger feelings than you, don't ignore the signs. It could be that you do have feelings for bae, but they're that you like him/her as a friend.

Image source: iStock

Have you and your bae ever decided you’d be better off as friends? Let us know in the comments!

You can follow the author, Heather Cichowski, on Twitter.


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  • Gwen


  • Gwen

    This is definitely my problem. But we’re actually at a different stage where we want to get together but, at the same time it never works out. He’s a perfect boyfriend in so many ways. So I’m still in this awkward relationship. I want to keep it. I think I can make it work. Should I?