Before we get into this, let’s define what it means to be a badass: it’s owning who you are and doing what you want (within reason, obviously) and speaking up when it would be more convenient to stay silent. This, of course, is easier said than done. But honestly, the world needs you – with all of the crappy things happening, we need to all act like the strong women we want to see out there. If you want to be more of a badass in 2017, there are some resolutions you have to make. Why? Because being a badass takes resolve, chutzpah, guts, and committed action, and if a new year is the catalyst you need to make it happen, so be it.
Now, I feel the need to point this out. Being a badass is not a commitment to be angry, mean, alienating, or a total rule-breaker (only sometimes for that last part). Like I said, it’s about doing what’s right even when others are telling you not to, and about acting like a strong person who can take care of themselves. It can improve so many different areas of your life, from school to dating to friendships to jobs. It’s part of being confident and empowering, and you already know how important those two things are. So, if all of this sounds like the person you strive to be, here are some resolutions you need to make that will make you more of a badass. I have faith in you!
Start Being More HonestLearning to be honest in the right way is so, so important. It makes you more of a badass, but it also makes you feel happier and lighter. When your friend asks what you think of her new crush, who you think is a total jerk, say, "I don't want to hurt your feelings, but I don't think he treats you the way you should be treated." When bae asks if you love something sexual they tried, and you didn't, say, "It wasn't my favorite. I love XXX so much more." If a friend asks if you want to hang out and you really just want to veg out at home, say, "I'm exhausted, I think I'm going to stay in tonight" instead of giving a false excuse. Get it? It will change your life! Source: iStock
Quit Being Mean To YourselfOur president-elect Donald Trump is a bully. There's no other word for it. If the ruler of our country is going to act like a jerk, the last thing you need is to double down on that and be mean to yourself. This includes negative self-talk, body shaming yourself, and thinking you're not "worth it." Love the parts of yourself that feel the most vulnerable or under attack. Resist feeding into the patriarchy by radically loving yourself against all odds... which sounds extreme, okay, but self love is a journey everybody. Start by forgiving yourself and noticing when something feels wrong or off and resist it in small ways. For me, it started by wearing shorts in the summer because it's hot and my comfort is more important than shielding the world from my cellulite.Source: iStock
Be More InclusiveHang out with and support girls who are different than you. Reach out to girls who are outside of your friend group and consider different perspectives. Not all girls struggle in the same way and we all have diverse points of view. This will make your feminism more intersectional just by living your life. Women of different races, abilities, backgrounds, and gender identities each have our own battles to fight. For example, did you know not all women have vaginas? Speak up and call it out the next time you see someone who claims to be a feminist being transphobic. Open up your circle of consideration and try to understand points of view that are different than yours. Use your privilege to boost underrepresented voices.Source: iStock
Apologize Way LessStop. Saying. "Sorry."As. A filler word. Stop saying it when you're asking for a favor. Stop saying it when you're saying something that needs to be said. Only say sorry for things you're actually, truly sorry for. Don't be the girl who says "sorry" in between every other sentence. It goes beyond the actual word "sorry," too. Stop shrinking yourself or your opinions away for the sake of others or to make people feel more comfortable. It's not healthy and it's not helping your self esteem either. It may seem small, but it can have a pretty big effect on how people see you.Source: iStock
Speak Up Loudly When You See Something Messed UpFrom everything like casual racism to full on violent sexism, it's time we stop being silent bystanders and letting other people get away with really messed up behavior. Of course, no one likes conflict, never mind being the center of a potentially heated debate, but the next time you see (or hear) something - say something. Because more than disliking conflict, people dislike feeling like they're alone with no one to back them up. If you're all about love, inclusion, and not receiving hate for being who you are, step up and speak up when you see people being disgusting and awful. It's truly badass to stand up for what you believe in and stand up for others, not just yourself.Source: iStock
Stand Up For YourselfIt's important to stand up for others, but it's also really important to remember to stand up for yourself too. The next time a friend makes fun of you a little too harshly, tell her you don't think it's cool. The next time a guy treats you like crap, call him out on it. If you hear someone was talking behind your back, confront them. You don't have to be super angry or mean - there's a way to stand up for yourself politely - but don't sit back and let others treat you with disrespect. Source: iStock
Stop Playing DumbPlay at the top of your intelligence or why even bother? Letting other people think your ideas are theirs, pretending not to know stuff for the sake of the men around you feeling good, and using it to get your way are all tired. Why let the world underestimate you on purpose? Enough with that. I understand wanting to be humble and not wanting to show off about how smart you are, but humility and intelligence can go hand in hand and you don't need to underplay how much you know. Playing dumb is not a good look on anybody and if we're being real, playing dumb feeds into a ton of harmful stereotypes about girls, so how about let's just not in 2017, okay?Source: iStock
Keep Your Gender Expression OpenThere is more than one right way to be a woman - it doesn't all involve acting "girly." You don't have to be femme to be feminine. Honestly, I put down a really cute snapback last week because I thought it made me look too butch. How crazy is that? There's nothing wrong with looking more androgynous. This year, open your idea of what it means to be a woman in this world! You always wanted a pixie cut? Go for it. Too scared to try skateboarding because it's a "boy thing"? Literally who cares. Stick it to the gender binary in 2017.Source: iStock
Stay Away From F*ckboysWe all know at least one problematic guy who thinks they're being amazing while the rest of the world has the problem with not understanding their genius or appreciating their true gallantry. They're exhausting and should not be given any consideration in dating, in crushing, even in considering their point of view. I know that sounds harsh, but anyone who thinks feminism was better "back then" because Susan B. Anthony covered up, thinks protesters can't change anything, hates Hillary Clinton for no reason, AND doesn't text you back in an appropriate amount of time can have all the seats and none of your time or energy.Source: iStock
What are your resolutions? What makes you feel like a badass? Let us know in the comments!
You can follow the author, Aliee Chan, on Twitter.