At this point, pizza has probably been ruined for most of us. I say this not in reference to the food itself (which has, over the years, remained reliably tasty) but rather something that I have taken to referring to as “Pizza Culture,” the mindset that led the objective popularity of pizza, the food, being turned into pizza, the product. You know, with, like, pizza-print pillows. Pizza necklaces. The phrase “pizza is bae” getting stamped on everything from T-shirts to mugs to orthodontia.
Still, the simple fact remains that pizza, the food, does happen to taste really good. And, besides, there are far worse things that one might enjoy to the point of obsession (opioids, perhaps), and it is important to remember that sometimes, you have chill out and let the people around you enjoy things. With that in mind, it is worth noting that Pizza Culture has spawned a bunch of pizza-related products that, for better or for worse, are pretty great. Whether you’re a steadfast member of Pizza Culture yourself, a casual partaker, or someone who skirts around its edges, you’ll probably enjoy them. So, check out these awesome pizza gifts that you probably need this year:
1. This truthful yoga mat:
The only inspiration you need to get you through the next yoga class you take, TBH.
Work It Out Exercise Mat, $35, Ban.do
2. This brave, brave pin:
It is the only way that pizza should be eaten, obviously. But will others agree?
Cold Pizza Club Patch, $5, Dream In Plastic
3. This bipartisan pin:
This, I think, is something that everyone can agree on.
I Believe In Pizza Pin, $10, Ban.do
4. This pin that shows where your true sentiments lie:
I Love Pizza Pin, $9, Ban.do
5. This spirited holiday sweatshirt:
The perfect thing to wear on Christmas morning.
Merry Christmas Crewneck, $26, Nylon Shop
6. This TRUTHFUL AF T-shirt:
Wear this to the workout class with your pizza mat. You’ll make friends, I promise.
Nothing Feels As Good As Pizza Tastes, $23.80, Nylon Store
7. This political T-shirt:
A reminder of what could have been.
Vote For Pizza Tee, $24, Nylon Store
8. This super-cool vinyl pizza backpack:
Perfect for next semester.
Hudson Pizza Backpack, $34, Nasty Gal
9. This…symbolic tank top:
I don’t know what this means, but I like it.
Pizza Cat Tank, $25, Nylon Store
10. This muscle tee that shows you mean business:
When you wear this out, people will practically, like, throw pizza at you all the time. So only wear it if you’re absolutely serious about pizza, I guess.
Bitch Better Have My Pizza Muscle Tank, $34, Nylon Store
11. This daring crop top:
I mean, it’s true.
Pizza Girls Muscle Crop Tank, $54, Nordstrom
12. This tote bag that perfectly describes you and your squad:
Use it to store your books! Your laptop! Or, you know. Some pizza.
Hot Girls Eating Pizza Tote, $24, Nylon Store
13. This punny sweatshirt:
If you think about this one too much, it stops making sense. (“Crust” is a object! “Trust” is an emotion! That changes the sentence structure completely!) So, uh, don’t think about it.
“In Pizza We Crust” Sweatshirt, $64, Nordstrom
14. A pizza inner tube:
So you can slide down the slopes in style. Don’t blame us if you get hungry, though.
All My Oven Snow Tube, $29.99, Modcloth
15. Pizza string lights:
Your holiday decorations aren’t complete without these, honestly.
Pizza Light Battery String Lights, $24.99, Nordstrom
16. Some fetching earrings:
Small enough so that you don’t *scream* pizza, but big enough so that people, you know, know.
Pepperoni Pizza Earrings, $9.95, Etsy
17. Some healing socks:
Some key words to get you through the day.
Topping Points Socks, $9.99, Etsy
18. This coin purse that will help keep your priorities straight:
You don’t have to save up for pizza, obviously. Pizza is a symbol. But still, this is cute.
Pizza Money Coin Purse, $3.99, Dream In Plastic
19. This cute li’l necklace:
So pizza may be close to your heart always.
Pizza Necklace, $34, Nylon Store
20. Pizza phone case:
Pizza. Hearts. What more could you want?
Heart Pizza Case, $20, Nylon Store
21. A pizza you can hug:
Don’t you love its li’l face?
Pizza Squishable, $35, Dream In Plastic
22. “Pizza Is Bae” necklace:
Well, someone had to say it.
Pizza Is Bae Necklace, $19.95, Etsy
What do you think of pizza? Are you going to get any of these gifts? Let us know in the comments!