12 Whisper Confessions From Teachers That Will Totally Freak You Out

If you’re in school, it can be tempting to think of your teachers as beings that share many characteristics with humans, but, at the same time, are not exactly human. What this makes teachers, then, is up for debate–aliens? Vampires who sleep in the classroom at night? Westworld-like robots that were specifically designed for your educational benefit?–but it’s hard not to think of them as humanoid zombies that exist in their own classroom and nowhere else, and think only of AP United States Hisory.

Of course, we all know that’s not exactly true. You could live in the same neighborhood as one of your teachers, which means that you’ve probably been forced into making awkward small talk with them when you run into them a local coffee shop or grocery store (usually at the worst possible moment for it to occur, like when you have an assignment due the next day that just asked for an extension on because you’re “so sick” and “can’t possibly finish in time”). You also might have come across some of your teachers’ social media profiles–chances are good that some of them are on Twitter and Instagram and almost all of them are on Facebook. The point is, we’ve all had interactions with teachers that, while objectively uncomfortable for all parties involved, basically force you to acknowledge their humanity.

Need some more convincing? Some teachers have taken to Whisper–the app that people use to share their secrets anonymously–to share their, uh, very human thoughts. So, check out these Whisper confessions from teachers that are probably going to freak you the heck out:\

1. They might help you cheat:



(Which seems counterproductive?)


2. Or, they could ruin your life:



This is a straight-up lawsuit. (In all seriousness, this is awful and I hope it is an isolated incident!)


3. Your seating arrangement could be a matchmaking attempt:


You’ve suspected this all along, haven’t you?


4. Sometimes, teachers skip school too:



Must be nice.


5. They definitely have favorites:



Though, of course, you knew that already.


6. You can always guess what they did last night based on what you do in class the next day:



So, uh, you know what it means when that thousand-year-old Bill Nye video comes on.


7. Some of them are secretly Banksy:



Gotta let that pent-up aggression out somehow.


8. They’re probably napping during their free period:



Hey, teaching is tiring.


9. Or just straight-up sleeping during class:



See? Tiring.



10. They miiiight hate your parents:


So, if you’ve got a helicopter parent, maybe tell them to back off a little.


11. Their computer probably isn’t exactly clean:





12. They know you’re not going to use this after high school, either:




What do you think of these confessions? Which one was the weirdest to you? Let us know in the comments!

You can reach the author, Sara Hendricks, on Twitter and Instagram.


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