So, I’m 16. I’m kind of a tomboy, although still feminine. I wear makeup, have long hair, wear band T-shirts and plaid shirts and ripped jeans and Converse runners, I play baseball, I love Star Wars and classic rock music and hockey and comic books and other stuff that’s not exactly “woman-like.” Now, I’m the only person in grade 11 who has never had a boyfriend. Do you think it could be because of my masculinity? Or do guys like nerdy tomboyish chicks?
Rule number one in life: guys are dumb. If you keep this in the back if your mind at all times, it’s going to save you a lot of trouble in the future. Even the nicest and most gentlemanly of guys is often unable to see a completely amazing girl when she is standing right in front of him–and you need to know that this is the exact situation you’re currently experiencing.
It sounds like you’re dealing with a small pool of guys to choose from, and they are all far too stupid to realize how overly awesome you are–their loss! This is sadly a very common thing, especially in high school and smaller communities. It’s not you–it’s your surroundings. Thankfully, your surroundings will both change and expand soon.
As you get older and maybe go to college or at least get out into the “real world,” you’re going to find TONS of guys who are into great music, movies, and sports and would be thrilled to have a girlfriend into the same things. Believe me when I say there are hordes of guys that consider the way you described yourself as a dream come true!
Don’t let the fact that you haven’t had a boyfriend or that the guys around you don’t understand the person that you are get you down or make you question yourself. There is absolutely nothing wrong with the hobbies you have, and to be honest, gender has nothing to do with what you find interesting and enjoyable. The idea of girls not being into sports or comics is an outdated notion, so embrace your uniqueness, as it will take you far in life!
In short, don’t even think of compromising or altering anything about yourself! Be proud of your individuality and your passion for the things you love. Trust that in time, guys with similar interests will find their way into your life, and you’ll end up far happier than you can imagine!
Joel Freimark has done a lot in life and seen even more. From last minute international travel to bizarre places to writing award winning books, he’s here to bring his wisdom to all your problems. He hosts a weekly advice series on Youtube and a music series also on YouTube. No question is too outrageous or personal, so go ahead and fire away! Follow him on Twitter.
Are you confused about a guy? Do you find yourself wondering, “What is he thinking?” Tell us everything in the comments! And if you have a question for Joel, email him at email@example.com!
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