Let me be one of many to reiterate something that you probably already know to be true: You never need to do anything for a guy. I know that you know this, because there are so many riffs and variations on this phrase that tend to be thrown into any vaguely inspirational speech or thinkpiece (“Don’t do anything you wouldn’t do for yourself for him!”; “Don’t build your life around a guy!”) that, at this point, you know it by heart. Your mom has probably told you this, your friends have told you this, and you have probably told it to your friends, too, with so much conviction and vigor that it seems like it’s something you’ve come up with entirely on your own.
And, for the record, this is true. Never do anything out of the ordinary for a guy! It is not worth it, in most cases, and, besides, at least a few of them are of the belief that menstruation is a result of one not being able to hold their bladder correctly. But it can be useful to know what the right and, in this case, wrong things to say to a guy might be when you’re texting them. What you choose to do with this information is totally up to you–you can use it to make sure guys always respond to your texts, or, you can use it to make sure that guys never respond to your texts. So, check out these texts that guys never want to get:
Lots Of EmojisGuys don't like emojis, apparently? I don't know. I think they're fine, personally. This depends on the guy you're texting, too, but if you're peppering your texts with lots of hearts and cats-with-heart-eyes, this could come off a little strong. Don't be scared of emojis, but also try to ease into them rather than jumping in all at once.
Broken-Up TextsAgain--Again, I think this depends on the guy you're texting. But if you're just starting things out with someone, you might want to hold off on doing that thing where you break up one text into, like, seven. This is a pet peeve for a lot of people, since it creates a lot Instead of taking a bunch of texts, take a deep breath, drink some water, and see if your message can be condensed into just one text.
The 'You Didn't Respond To My Text' TextThink about this happening on your end--if you aren't responding to someone, usually there's a reason or you're just, like, not there at the moment. Returning to your phone to a bunch of angry WHERE ARE YOU texts isn't exactly going to warm you up to someone, is it? If you have time-sensitive plans, you can (and should) send a follow-up text, but anything more than that (and for something that might not require a response) is really unnecessary.
Passive-Aggressive AngerIf the person you're texting did something to piss you off, don't tell them over text. Or, to be more exact, you can tell them over text, just don't try to just, like, show it. You know, like, leaving them on read. Saying "k" as a response to a question. IT can be hard to say what you mean, but it's better than saying nothing as a means of communicating that you're upset over something.
Flaccid TextsAKA texts that take up space but don't actually do anything. Don't be wishy-washy! If you genuinely don't have an opinion on something, that's fine, but I am assuming that you do have a personality IRL. Try to show it!
Initial Love DeclarationGood rule of thumb? Don't say it over text if you can't say it IRL!
Breakup TextI mean, breaking up with someone over text isn't nice for anyone, not just guys. There are exceptions, of course--like if the person you're seeing did something really, extra horrible, or if you've just been on one date--but, for the most part, do it in person. It sucks to have to actually face the person you're ending things with, but it's actually easier than doing it over text. Plus, this way, there are no screenshot-able receipts.
Requiring Constant UpdatesVery few people *actually* text like the (fabricated, shhh) person in the image here, but you get the idea. Expecting a constant stream of texts is definitely fine once you have an established relationship with someone. But you should never assume that someone you're talking to is the type who wants to hear everything about your day, every day.
What do you think of these texts? Are there any that I forgot? Let us know in the comments!