Ask A Guy: Here’s Why Guys Like Your Instagram Pictures But Won’t Talk To You IRL

Hey Joel,

There was this guy in my class last year and I’ve had a crush on him since I first saw him. We worked together on projects and got kind of close, but not close enough to exchange numbers or talk outside of class. Over the summer we followed each other on Instagram and he ALWAYS likes what I post. He hasn’t failed to like one of my posts since we followed each other, but he hasn’t done anything else. I feel like this is a common problem–I’ve talked to my friends and stuff like this has happened to all of them too. So, I guess my question is, why do guys like your pictures if they don’t seem to be interested in you in any other way?


One of the worst things about our culture of social media is the massive number of miscommunications and mixed signals that occur due to people basically hiding behind their keyboard. Whether it’s your boyfriend liking posts by some other girl, or the situation you’re facing, so many questions could be easily answered if people spent more time face to face.

Your question of why a guy would go about blowing up your social media without actually talking to you is basically because the “rules” of courting have changed. As things like Instagram have become huge, doing what he’s doing is sort of the new way of hitting on someone. He’s basically letting you know he’s interested, and is probably hoping you’ll give him sort of sign if you like him back.

Honestly, if you’re into this guy, you need to go after what you want. His actions on social media show that he shares interests with you or is at least interested in the things you do–so that’s a very good sign. You said he hasn’t missed a single post of yours, so I think he is trying to get your attention in a major way.

The fact that you already know each other adds to the positive spin, as you don’t need to stress over the first conversation, and you also have some shared history. You really have all the pieces in place that most people want before starting something, and if I were you, I’d reach out to him and see if he wants to hang out.

I say it all the time: there is absolutely nothing wrong with women being the more aggressive one in a relationship, and if you don’t try, you’ll never know. I think he’s shown you he’s interested, so get away from the screen and ask him to go grab coffee or walk in the park. Who knows–maybe you’ll be in the same photo soon!

Best wishes,


Joel Freimark has done a lot in life and seen even more. From last minute international travel to bizarre places to writing award winning books, he’s here to bring his wisdom to all your problems. He hosts a weekly advice series on Youtube and a music series also on YouTube. No question is too outrageous or personal, so go ahead and fire away! Follow him on Twitter.

Are you confused about a guy? Do you find yourself wondering, “What is he thinking?” Tell us everything in the comments! And if you have a question for Joel, email him at!

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