Like most people, my Instagram app serves as the impetus behind most of the things I have, at least at one point, thought about doing. Because of Instagram, I have been inspired to cut my hair into a lob. I have been inspired to arrange some succulent plants on my windowsill in tiny little pots so that the early morning light spills through and creates a perfect hazy glow as I enjoy my post-yoga acai smoothie bowl and (#sponsored) Fit Tea. I have been inspired, by the Instagram account for goop, Gwyneth Paltrow’s lifestyle blog, to start and stop no fewer than seven clean-eating “lifestyle adjustments” (not diets, you must understand, for clean eating is a way of life rather than a mere temporary change, also, shut up Sara) that involve Vegenaise and zoodles and arugula-avocado smoothies, which I feel will not only change my body, but also my overall outlook.
All of these ideals eventually become abandoned, of course, for reasons that have more or less to do with my face shape, my inherent laziness, and the fact that, more often than not, I become struck by a certain kind of hunger in which only thing that can possibly satisfy me is an economy-sized serving of fettucine alfredo or those soft icing-covered cookies that you can only get at chain grocery stores, which I like to refer to as “crack cookies.” But, the point is, Instagram has inspired me.
And, today, Instagram has inspired me once more–to find out exactly what goes into creating the perfect #RelationshipGoals couple.
#RelationshipGoals is a concept that is as synonymous to Instagram as lob haircuts and succulent plants and Gwyneth Paltrow-endorsed cleanses, if not more so. It is there that former Relationship Goals couple Jay and Alexis (RIP) founded their relationship, after all, and it is there that many insufferable couples will post their matching outfit #CoupleGoals photos.
It’s not as easy as it looks, though. Here are the ways to tell if you are actually a Relationship Goals couple:
1. Do you wear corny-ass matching couple clothes?
2. What about matching underwear?
3. What about destroyed pantaloons that seem to exist for no reason other than to show off your matching underwear?
4. Have you gifted bae a massive stuffed bear?
5. Does bae constantly threaten to eat your ass, but, like, not in a sexy way?
6. Or your stomach?
7. Do you insist upon performing an acrobatic act any time you kiss on the lips?
8. In fact, do you really just not know how to kiss at all?
9. Like, for real–you just don’t know how to do it:
10. What is this? Stop it!!
11. Do you do, uh, this?
12. Are at least one of you dead?
13. And, of course, do you force your pals to photograph you and your SO?
If so, congrats! You and bae are officially #goals.
What do you think of these (vital) guidelines? Are there any that I missed? Let us know in the comments!