15 Of The Rudest Chain Text Messages That You’ll Want To Send To All Of Your Friends

If you are looking to reconnect with an old friend (or an old lover ;0)), there are a number of things you might do. You could send them a Facebook message. You could invest in an Etsy-made greeting card and send them a thoughtful, handwritten letter.  Or, you can do the one thing that is guaranteed to get you a reaction–plumb the deepest, darkest, most eggplant emoji-infested depths of the internet to send them the weirdest chain text message you can muster. You know the ones I’m talking about–but, just in case you don’t, here’s a reminder:

http://chaintexts.tumblr.com/post/133623521732/mmmmmm-u-know-what-really-gets-me-goin-is

I’m telling you, it works. There is not one person on this earth who is capable of receiving such a perfectly uncouth message like this and not responding, even if the response is something like “What is this?” or “Who is this? Why do you keep sending these to me? I have been tormented for so long and I am begging you stop, please, free me.” What more could one want? So, check out these chain texts (in text format, so you can copy-paste them right your own messages) that, quite frankly, are so rude–but you’ll absolutely want to send them to all of your friends:

1. Oh:

http://operadad.tumblr.com/post/120658546022/happy-egg-day-its-the-most


 

2. The best ones straddle that fine, fine line between “sincerity” and “depravity:”

http://chainmessage.tumblr.com/post/121401216344/yaaaaaaaas-mama-yaaaasss-mothers-day-is


 

3. And they work for literally any occasion:

http://chaintexts.tumblr.com/post/145023704672/hey-whats-up-sluts-of-2-0-1-6-we-finally


 

4. And any holiday:

http://chaintexts.tumblr.com/post/146924793867/happy-birthday-to-all-my-bald-eagle


 

5. This one, of course, was probably inevitable:

http://chaintexts.tumblr.com/post/147613235912/i-choose-you-bow-down-get-trained-by


 

6. As was this:

http://chaintexts.tumblr.com/post/146170316447/happy-fathers-day-my-delcious-daddies


 

7. And, um, this. Hamilton culture is not to be messed with!

http://spageddy.tumblr.com/post/133245842299/alexander-joined-forces-with-james-madison


 

8. Just as the original Olympians intended from the start of the Games:

http://chaintexts.tumblr.com/post/148676213012/whats-up-my-asslethes-its-scummer-2-0-1-6-so


 

9. Excuse me:

http://carrot-fanfics.tumblr.com/post/114859045931/hey-buddddy-my-grandma-may-have-died


 

10. WHY:

http://chaintexts.tumblr.com/post/146431129627/im-deleting-you-european-union


 

11. I must say, however, that the true champions of the genre are the ones that can only be classified as “wholesome:”

http://chainmessage.tumblr.com/post/121401173339/its-moday-the-start-of-a


 

12. Like this one, encouraging fitness and hard work:

http://chainmessage.tumblr.com/post/121401227329/if-you-cant-handle-me-at-my-most-sweaty


 

13. And this one that is in support of, um, the bees:

http://fakesupernovas.tumblr.com/post/129924110285/attention-all-bees-you-are-the


 

14. Welp. No matter what happens, we’ll always have chain messages, I guess:

http://chainmessage.tumblr.com/post/121401180054


 

15. With this, farewell:

http://chainmessage.tumblr.com/post/121401150284/today-is-shrek-day-shrek-1-came-out-this

What do you think of these texts? Which ones would you send? Let us know in the comments!

You can reach the author, Sara Hendricks, on Twitter and Instagram.

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