Receiving oral sex is great. More often than not, it’s more than great, actually. It can be wonderful… amazing… magical, even, if you have the right partner doing it. The one thing that can take the fun out of oral sex faster than you can say, “YASS?” Stressing about how you taste and/or smell down there. The vagina is a weird, delicate, sensitive part of our bodies, and while it holds the key to sexual pleasure, it is also the place where we pee out of, bleed out of, and poop pretty close to. Besides these bodily functions, there are other things to think about – discharge and that smell that vaginas just have that you can’t even describe. Wouldn’t it be nice to have something that could make your vagina taste and smell better so you could just relax?
Unfortunately, I don’t have the solution to that problem. Sorry! No one does. Again, vaginas are sensitive and delicate, and any kind of nice-smelling douche, spray, or wipe can easily upset your pH balance, leading to an infection, which leads to a far worse smell than the one down there on a regular basis. Your best bet is showering regularly, like pretty shortly before someone puts their face down there, but we can’t just be like, “Hey, wait, let me shower before you do that. No, it’s fine, the moment isn’t ruined, just be patient.”
But, while I don’t have a cure-all solution, I do have some old wives tales, and I don’t know, it’s better than nothing! While there’s no science-backed research on foods that make your vag taste better, there is a lot of speculation and some pretty good theories behind the below suggestions. At the very least, they’ll make your vag taste and smell mild, like a vagina… whatever that means. Because honestly, at the end of the day, your vay-jay-jay doesn’t need to smell like a lovely field of roses. It’s a body part where a lot of stuff happens, and no one expects it to taste like liquid gold (and if they do, they shouldn’t be down there). So, here are some foods that *might* make your vagina taste and smell better… but don’t get too caught up in it, okay?
PineapplesYou've all heard the rumor that pineapples make your vag smell and taste awesome. Is it true? I don't know... but a lot of people certainly vouch for it. While there is no scientific evidence that pineapples make your vagina taste great, it's certainly possible! Pineapples are sweet and smell good, and the food you eat definitely affects your down there situation. I would never advise rubbing yourself with pineapple, but there's no harm in eating it and then seeing what happens! Source: iStock
Green VeggiesGreen veggies generally contributing to keeping your vag smelling and tasting mild and "normal." Except for asparagus and broccoli. ASPARAGUS AND BROCCOLI ARE TO BE AVOIDED. Asparagus smells. It makes your pee smell, and it probably makes your vagina smell and taste a little off as well. Same with broccoli! But you're probably safe with leafy greens and stuff like that. In general, a vegan/vegetarian diet makes someone's cum taste better than someone who eats a lot of meat. Meat definitely makes you smell funky down there! Source: iStock
Berries/FruitFruit and berries in general are known to be good for your vagina when it comes to smell and taste. Like with pineapple, there is no hard evidence of this (can you imagine a study like that?), but there are lots of Internet testimonies saying it's true. Source: iStock
WaterI realize water is not a good, I am not dense. But it still deserves a spot here! While water itself might not directly lead to a vagina that smells like a nice candle, it can certainly do that indirectly. Drinking a lot of water flushes out your system, which means it basically helps to clean your vagina. It gets rid of the icky stuff, preventing infections and weird smells and tastes. Source: iStock
YogurtIn general, dairy isn't great when your goal is to make your vagina taste better. Dairy can actually make it worse. Yogurt, on the other hand, might help. Yogurt is full of good bacteria that your vagina needs to function happily so it can be healthy. Yogurt helps prevent infections and keeps your pH system balanced, which in turn keeps your vag in good shape. Source: iStock
PeppermintThere is no scientific evidence saying peppermint makes you taste good down there, but some people swear by it. I even read someone advising girls to rub peppermint leaves on their vag. I would advise against this, because I think it will not be helpful and could be disastrous, but hey... try drinking some peppermint tea and then see if you notice a difference. Source: iStock
HoneyAgain, there is no scientific evidence to back this up, but some people seem convinced it's true. Maybe it is! Honey is sweet! (Although excess sugar can make things smell bad down there, so I'm a little torn.) But please don't put honey on your vagina. I saw one blogger advise doing that and I have to say that sounds awful. Source: iStock
CranberriesDoctors can't say that cranberries ward off UTIs and the like, because there is no scientific evidence there, but some people swear by them. Cranberry juice (the natural stuff, not the cranberry juice cocktail that's full of sugar), or cranberries in general, help to cleanse your body, flushing out the bad stuff. That's why they're known to help with UTIs. Source: iStock
Have you ever tried any of these? What did we forget? Let me know in the comments.