Sex with a dude is all good and fun… until you stumble upon a situation where the guy’s penis doesn’t fit in your vag. The problem sounds laughable, until it happens to you and it just becomes really, really frustrating. There are two reasons why this can occur. One: you’re a virgin, you’ve never really had anything down there, and you’re feeling a little bit nervous. Two: the guy you’re hooking up with has a very large penis, and trying to get it in is uncomfortable, to say the least. Or hey, maybe it’s a combination of the two! Lucky you?
In all seriousness, it sucks to want to have sex, and then feel like you can’t because of logistical reasons. It’s easy to get so self-conscious about it that you start blaming yourself – is there something wrong with my vagina? – and then feel inadequate. It often turns into a vicious cycle of trying, getting frustrated, and then dealing with the fact that that frustration makes it even harder to get it to fit.
So how can you get his penis to fit without, you know, ripping your vagina in half (JK that can’t happen)? Read on for some tips on what to do if his penis won’t fit… and remember: practice makes perfect.
Use A Lot Of ForeplayIf he can't get his penis in because it's your first time, the reason it won't fit is usually because you're nervous and you're clenching up down there without even realizing it. This can cause your vag to be more dry than usual. To avoid this, try engaging in a lot of foreplay. Getting genuinely turned on relaxes you, gives you some much-needed natural lubrication, and can lead to a more natural progression of things happening. One tip is to have him finger you - he can start with using one finger, then move to using two to try and get you used to the feeling of something being in there. Source: iStock
Get More Comfortable With Putting Things In Your VaginaSpeaking of getting used to the feeling of something being in there, here's this tip! Again, if the reason the penis can't get in there is because you're a virgin, you might want to play around with inserting things into your vag to make things a little bit easier with bae. This can be as simple as using tampons (you can go for super if you want to try to get something bigger in there) or as fun as using a vibrator or dildo to masturbate.
Rely On LubeOne of the reasons a penis can't get into a vagina is because it isn't wet enough. Virgins are usually pretty nervous, and that feeling can make it almost impossible for the vagina to produce a lot of natural lubrication. If you're not a virgin but the guy's penis is just a little too big, and you guys try a lot, it will make things dry out down there. Rely on lube to get you through. It makes things much easier.
Try To Relax As Much As PossibleI know this tip is frustrating because trying to relax is almost as bad as feeling stressed. Before you even start hooking up, make your environment as comfortable as possible. Do whatever works for you - wear something you feel good in, put on soothing music, light some candles, etc. It doesn't matter what you do, as long as it makes you feel more calm! It's so important to be relaxed, because feeling anxious about it makes you tighten up without even realizing what you're doing. Source: iStock
Avoid Certain PositionsIf a guy's penis is too big to fit, there are certain positions you might not be able to do - sometimes forever, sometimes just in the beginning until you adjust. This includes doggy style and any position that encourages deep penetration like having your legs up in the air. You might also want to avoid any position where he has a lot of control. If he does get it in and then gets too "in the moment," he might start going too fast or hard. Source; Cosmopolitan
Try Being On TopIf a position where he has all of the control is a bad thing, then it makes sense that a position where you have more control is a good thing. Try getting on top, which allows you to be in charge of most of the movement. Missionary is another position that might work. You can also try laying on your sides with him behind you. Source: Cosmopolitan
Take It SlowFor some things, it's best to just rip the band-aid off and go for it. Not for this, because that will not be enjoyable. Take things slow. Have him enter you gently, then move very slowly until you get more of a rhythm going on. Your first time (or first few times) might be a very slow process, but that's okay - just let yourself get used to it. Source: iStock
Be PatientIf you tried to have sex once, couldn't, then tried these tips and still couldn't, relax and be patient. Sometimes it takes more than one or two tries - sometimes it takes a lot of tries! Practice makes perfect here, so keep trying new things or trying what seems to be working at least a little bit. Source: iStock
Have you ever had this problem where his penis wouldn’t fit? What did we forget to include? Share in the comments!