It sounds weird, but being single takes up a lot of time and energy… so much so that single girls everywhere probably experience what I’ve come to call “single girl fatigue.” It happens when the energy expended as a single person becomes so much that you get physically and emotionally exhausted. It means you’ve been single for way too long (although that’s not a bad thing!). You tire of the daily trials and tribulations, the endless romantic in-between “what if” situations, and the weird societal assumption that your life will somehow be better and more meaningful once you get partnered up. Ugh.
Being single for too long comes with a lot of tough expectations. If you’re not pursuing someone romantically, you should be living your fullest, best, most exciting life. You’re single after all! You have no one to report back to or check in with about what you want to do or when you want to do it. You should be doing all of the things or you’re doing it wrong! Do you want to be with someone? Are you on Tinder or OKCupid? Why aren’t you putting yourself out there, you should be putting yourself out there more, don’t you want to find *~true love~*? Above all else, are you being a #GoodFeminist while you navigate single-hood? See? Either way you’re totally screwed, and by screwed, I mean expending all of your energy trying to be your peak single self.
If you happen to be single and exhausted af with all of it, there’s nothing wrong with you. In fact, you’re right to be a little bit tuckered out. You might need a break, girl. I think we all need one. If these signs that you’ve been single for way too long hit home, feel free to burrito yourself in the nearest blanket and take a personal hiatus from dealing with life. It’s too much.
1) The thought of going on yet another first date feels physically exhausting.
Oh god, that means having to get ready and pretending to be interested in this person? No thank you.
2) You’d rather #NetflixAndChill by yourself.
You don’t have to share snacks? Don’t mind if I do.
3) The thought of online dating or any dating app is overwhelming.
The endless siping. Does it ever end?
4) You get sad when you have a crush because you feel like it’s too impossible to ever be a real thing.
You’re like, “I hope his future girlfriend is nice because he’s nice and we’re never going to happen.” You never consider the possibility of him liking you back, and it’s not because you’re being pessimistic, you’re just feeling extra lazy.
5) You have zero energy to craft a witty text because it doesn’t feel worth the effort.
Seriously, why bother, right?
6) Texting boys has become designated “how much can I mess with this person before they realize I’m sending them Drake lyrics?” time.
And other assorted ways to weirdly experiment and annoy others, because why waste your energy actually trying?
7) Your relatives have stopped asking you if you’re seeing someone because they know better.
Hell hath no fury like a girl who’s relatives can only contextualize her life in chapters of pursuing or being in a relationship.
8) You don’t have the energy or wherewithal to know if someone is flirting with you.
It’s so off your radar you wouldn’t be able to recognize it if you saw it.
9) If you’re not interested in someone, you have no problem letting them know.
You’re so fatigued that you’re super not into wasting your own precious time. Your energy is limited and you go to let a boy know.
10) You don’t get dressed to go out anymore because who cares?
Meeting up with friends? This sweatshirt looks nice. So cozy. Why would you try to look cute for some handsome stranger? It never happens.
11) The “I dare you not to cry” cheesy romantic videos of marriage proposals or prom-posals don’t do much for you anymore.
They all look the same. It’s a wash. You’ve gone numb to sentimentality.
12) Sexual frustration and apathy are starting to feel more and more similar.
13) You almost would rather be single forever than have to deal with trying to find a partner.
You’ve projected your life without a partner and honestly it’s not that bad. Also, screw waiting around for some guy to come along to live your life.
14) Your body would go into shock if someone expressed a genuine romantic interest in you.
Literal catatonic shock.
15) You’re bored of yourself.
The whole positive spin about being single is that everyone’s trying to tell you that you can have more time to get to know yourself. You already know yourself. You’ve turned over every stone. Self is done. Now what? You’re so bored.
How long have you been single? What are you sick of the most? Let me know in the comments.
You can follow the author, Aliee Chan, on Twitter.