For the most part, the purpose of a bra is pretty simple. In fact, its literal definition–as per the Merriam-Webster dictionary–is “a piece of clothing that is worn by women under other clothes to cover and support the breasts.” Of course, this definition doesn’t exactly describe a lot of bras that are on the market today, which seem to exist as separate clothing items unto themselves, and not just things that should be worn under clothes.
This is fine, obviously. The bras of today don’t have to adhere to the no-nonsense, cone-shaped confines of their 1950s origins (never, never forget), and it can definitely be fun to wear some prettily, if unnecessarily, intricately-designed lingerie for no reason other than to have something cool going on under/over/in place of your clothes. Bells and whistles are cool, and I won’t hear anyone tell me otherwise. It’s just that some bra designers seem to take this whole bells and whistles idea literally and make it so that the bra is all bells and all whistles. This, usually, results in a product that lacks the two vital components of the standard bra definition–the ability to wear it under clothes, and, most importantly, the capability to support one’s boobs even a little bit. They are pretty amusing, though. Check out these bras that are so bizarre and so seemingly lacking in any semblance of support whatsoever that they really just have absolutely no business in even existing at all:
1. This bralette (?), which was brought to my attention by Jezebel earlier this week. I just…why? What is it, even?
2. This candy bra. Fun in theory, very sticky in actuality (I assume).
3. This chain mail bra, which would also be fun if it weren’t for all of the surely-imminent subsequent chafing.
5. This rainbow situation.
6. This bralette, which is very pretty! Just probably not all that supportive. Or at all supportive, really.
7. This garment that just can’t seem to decide whether it wants to be a shirt or a bra.
8. Ditto this one.
9. This, um, open arrangement.
10. This nice, tasteful choker bra.
11. And, finally, this garden bra that’s sure to match with just about anything.
What do you think of these bras? Would you ever buy any of them? Let us know in the comments!