I have always been of the belief that everyone should believe in at least one conspiracy theory over the course of their life. See, immediately discounting any and all conspiracy theories is just no fun, but blindly accepting any of them is just a good way to make people not want to be friends with you. My own inclination towards conspiracy theories has always been more celebrity-focused than anything else–I’m not really a chemtrails type of girl, and while I would love to believe that some people I know are secretly lizards, I just cannot truly accept that, you know? Celebrity conspiracy theories are perfect, though, since most of us feel like we know celebrities pretty well–most of them are so freaking present in our lives–but they’re also distant enough so that if you see the right picture of them in which their nose looks particularly angular, you might feel like, yeah, sure. That’s a triangle, and Matty B. Raps is absolutely in the Illuminati.
This is why the one conspiracy theory that I believe in, personally, is that Nick Jonas fell in with a ruthless, elite gambling/ fight club in the later years of his adolescence, which gave him a killer bod but also sapped him of all of his money, meaning that he’s at the club’s mercy until he pays them back. They then forced the Jonas Brothers to break up so that they could employ NJ as their dancing monkey who is forced sing for his supper in a variety of locations and/or take off his shirt whenever he hears the words “Scream Queens.”
Did I make this one up myself? Yes. Will I be taking it to my grave? Absolutely. Don’t @ me (or do! We can talk about it there). In any case, there are a bunch of super-interesting celebrity conspiracy theories out there, from the whole Beyonce/Jay-Z/ Illuminati 666 business to the Katy Perry/ JonBenet Ramsey thing. So, no matter how you feel about conspiracy theories in general, you should check out the weirdest celebrity conspiracy theories ever–maybe one of them will become your own special theory:
Katy Perry Is JonBenet RamseyAccording to a bunch of conspiracy theorists on YouTube, JonBenet Ramsey (a young pageant girl who was murdered in the mid 1990s) was actually never murdered but instead went undercover, changed her identity, and grew up to be...Katy Perry. The singer. I'm sure yo've heard of her. The reasoning here is basically that their face structure, parents, and eyebrows (which one theorist alleges cannot change at any point throughout your life) kind of look the same, so they must be the same, too. There's no way this is true (plus, it's, like, very disrespectful to the Ramsey family as a whole) but it certainly is intriguing, if nothing else. Image source:YouTube
Megan Fox Has Been Replaced By A Clone...TwiceThere is an exhaustive online forum, spanning from July 2009 to May 2013, full of people who are convinced that Megan Fox has been replaced by a clone not once, but twice. Because of..the government? Which created a lot of clones? The specifics are unclear, but these people are very convinced. Megan Fox, by the way, seems to be a muse for conspiracy theorizing--there's another rumor floating around that she doesn't even exist but is, in fact, a joint creation of twenty-three different actors. Why? No reason. Just because. Image source:Jon Kopaloff/Getty
Miley Cyrus Is Extremely DeadIf you go by the hypotheses of various crazy people on the Internet, Miley Cyrus has died many times over--in 2007, 2010, and 2014. The idea is that she angered the Disney corporation in some way, so, obviously, they disposed of her. But since murder is pretty bad PR, objectively speaking, they replaced her with a stand-in who underwent plastic surgery to look like her. While, like the "Katy Perry is JonBenet Ramsey" rumor, there is no way this happened, points for effort and highlighting the suspicions that lots of people seem to have about the Disney corporation, anyway. Image source:Kevin Winter/ Getty
Britney Spears' Meltdown Was A Tool Of The Bush AdministrationYou know that joke your friends have about how Bush did 9/11? Well, now you can one-up them with this one--that the Bush administration orchestrated Britney Spears' 2007 meltdown (head-shaving and all) to distract the nation from the Iraq War. Says Callie Beusman on Jezebel, "This is an A+ concept because it is batshit but also a sharp criticism of our obsession with celebrity culture, maybe." True! Image source:C. Flanigan/Getty
Justin Bieber Is A ReptoidOne time, Justin Bieber blinked on camera and his eyes...twitched a little? Anyway, this led a bunch of people to leap to the conclusion that the Biebs is one of those notorious reptilian humanoids that lurk among us. Fun to imagine! Probably not true. (But just imagine!) Image source:Kevin Mazur/Getty
Beyonce Was Never PregnantBeyonce and Jay-Z's names show up in a bunch of different online conspiracy theories--they're in the Illuminati, Solange is Bey's daughter, Beyonce murdered Joan Rivers, etc. The most prevalent of these rumors, however, is the one that alleges that Beyonce was never actually pregnant with her daughter, sayingBlue Ivy (based on the fact that her dress once crumpled a little when she sat down at a talk show. Eventually, Beyonce shut it down, saying, "It's actually the most ridiculous rumor I think I've ever had, about me." Image source:Gregg DeGuire/Getty
Nicolas Cage Is A VampireI love this conspiracy theory! It's so fun. Basically, Nicolas Cage looks almost exactly like this daguerreotype of a Civil War soldier. Are they, in fact, one and the same? Has Nic Cage been on this earth since the dawn of time? Probably! Image source:Hollywood Reporter
What did you think of these conspiracy theories? Do you believe any of them? Let us know in the comments!