When it comes to sex, everyone has that moment where they feel like they need to spice things up, whether it’s by trying out a crazy new sex position or taking a risk in a more public location. However, while there’s nothing wrong with exploring new ways to do the deed, you’ve got to admit that some of the most popular positions aren’t all that they’re cracked up to be.
Having sex in the shower, under water, or at the beach might sound like the ultimate sex fantasy, but believe it or not, they’re way more difficult than they appear to be and things can get extremely awkward pretty fast. Still not convinced? Well, before you try anything crazy with your partner, check out why these 10 popular sex positions and locations that are actually overrated.
1. Food sex.
Combining sex with food always sounds like such an exotic and sexy idea (like licking gravy off of your partner’s skin or lathering melted chocolate all over their body). But just imagine how much of a mess it would make and the amount of work you’d have to go through to clean everything up. And plus, imaging how awkward would it be if you ended up having to visit the hospital because of a bad reaction to a food allergy… Yeah, not pretty.
2. Sex in the shower.
This is the one type of sex that almost always looks perfect and sensual in movies, but it’s not even remotely close to that in real life. Shower sex is actually dangerous because you risk slipping and seriously injuring yourself. But on top of that, doing it under running water is just as bad as dry sex, because water is not actually a lubricant.
3. Sex on the beach.
Despite what any movie tries to tell you, rubbing against the hot, gritty sand and getting grains of it into your lady parts is not sexy at all. It’s actually a nightmare.
4. The reverse cowgirl.
The reverse cowgirl might look fancy in a diagram, but in real life it’s not even worth it. It’s extremely risky because the slightest mistake, like leaning forward too much or bouncing too hard, can fracture the penis. And plus, you’re just putting in a lot of extra energy for very little pleasure.
5. The 69.
Oh, give me a break. People treat this position like it’s so mind-blowing because it’s simultaneous oral sex. But you know what? It’s not even that great. It’s extremely hard to find a position that’s comfortable for both of you, and when you’re at it, you can’t even focus on your own pleasure because you’re so busy trying to give oral at the same time. Why even bother to do this simultaneously when you can just take turns?
6. Sex in a car.
To have good sex you need space, and the backseat of a car doesn’t provide that (unless you happen to be in a huge limo or van that offers the space of a full bed). Bending and twisting your body to fit into small places is just too much of a hassle.
It might feel pretty good at first, but it just gets so boring and it’s not very intimate. After all, you barely get to touch your partner, you can’t get to look at them while it happens, and you’re just stuck there, gazing at the ground while they pummel you from behind. Not very romantic.
8. Standing up sex.
Grinding upright against the wall is way harder that it looks, especially if you have nothing around you to grab for leverage. Since your partner would have to hold you up, it could put a huge strain on them and the sex could end pretty quick (unless you find a flat surface to lean against).
9. Sex underwater.
Having sex in a pool or a hot tub might seem sexy, but you might want to avoid this and stick with dry land. The bacteria in ponds, lakes, and pools can actually lead to genital infections. The chlorine in water could upset the pH balance of your vagina, and of course, since water is not a lubricant, there would be a lot of uncomfortable friction.
I don’t understand the point of threeways at all, it’s just so cluttered and awkward and confusing, because you have to focus on not one, but two people. And of course, there’s the fact that jealousy can arise because you’re giving one person more attention than the other. That’s just a recipe for disaster.
Have you tried any of these sex positions before? Do you think they are overrated? Tell us in the comments below!