Before we get into this, I want to make one thing clear: there is absolutely nothing wrong with being confident. Confidence is so great, and so many girls could use a lot more of it in their lives. I love it when people love themselves! Sometimes, though, people take it too far and they become conceited, not confident. A healthy dose of self-love: amazing. Acting the same way Kanye West has been acting on Twitter: annoying.
There is a fine line between confidence and arrogance. Feeling good about yourself is a self-assurance that you are capable and worthy. Being conceited means that you take that to an excess wherein you believe that you are the best. There’s a quote that I like that sums things up pretty easily: “Confidence is not ‘they will like me.’ Confidence is ‘I’ll be fine if they don’t.” See what I mean? So, not going out with someone you’re not attracted to isn’t being conceited, but rejecting everyone else because you’re convinced that Zayn Malik is the only guy in the world on your same level of attractiveness could be a sign that you’re conceited.
Finally being confident after warding your way though a mountain of insecurities and self-doubt is a journey and a half. In fact, most conceited people are insecure themselves, they’re just masking it really hard with aggressive fake confidence. If you’re worried that you come off as conceited, not confident, you can check in with yourself about whether or not your confidence comes from an authentic place. While you may use your confidence to be a boss-bitch in your every day life, it’s chief purpose is not to slam others. Being conceited feels like over compensating for something you lack by pushing others away with this false bravado.
By all means, I don’t want to discourage you from being confident. If you’re secretly conceited and you don’t know it, maybe consider these 15 signs as a signal that something may be up. Chill out, you don’t have to keep your guard up all the time, and trust that no one’s out to steal your confidence.
1) You feel like you always have to one-up everyone.
It’s normal for anyone to want to share experiences and similar stories. But if you feel like your stories are always better, funnier, and more interesting than everyone else’s, that’s a problem.
2) You talk down to others.
You’re condescending to people because they’re clearly not on your level. You doubt the intelligence of everyone else and always assume people don’t know what they’re talking about because you clearly know better. Sure, there are some things you might be more of an expert on, but you don’t know everything!
3) You constantly interrupt anyone you have a conversation with.
Because what you have to say is way more important, more important than what they’re saying.
4) You can never admit you’re wrong.
When you’re conceited, you’re infallible. You can do no wrong because you are never wrong. If you can’t remember the last time you admitted you were wrong, that’s a problem.
5) You never ask for help.
If you constantly refuse to ask for help because you don’t think anyone can really help, you’re coming off as a huge know-it-all.
6) When you do ask for help, you can never share credit with the people who’ve helped you.
If you act like you make everything happen, you’re too focused on yourself.
7) You don’t care if you’ve hurt someone else’s feelings or offend other people.
Your opinion deserves to be heard. But that doesn’t mean you should put others down while expressing it.
8) You rage or get hurt whenever someone’s critical of you.
Not being able to take constructive criticism is a big problem and a sign of arrogance.
9) You take everything really personally.
Because everything’s always about YOU! (Not it’s not).
10) You’re “not like most girls”
You’re a different, special snowflake. You’re better. You’re so much better than better that you’re *~not like most girls~*. If I never hear this phrase again, I’d be really happy.
11) If someone doesn’t agree with you, they’re wrong.
12) You assume all social hangs revolve around you.
Your being late, only wanting to watch movies or do activities that you’re interested in doesn’t take into account any different point of view from your friends, which doesn’t feel great for them. Especially when you loudly complain when something doesn’t go your way.
13) You flaunt your status in front of others, even if it’s fake.
You pretend your fake bag is real in the name of being better than everyone. When your friend tells you they have a crush on Ryan, you say things like, “Oh, Ryan? Ugh, he was texting me last month. Why is he so obsessed with me?” just so your friend knows he was attracted to you first. Keep your social and economic status to yourself.
14) You’re constantly comparing and judging others for the sole purpose of making sure they’re lesser than you.
15) You think about yourself more than other people.
What’s going on with you and your life is an all consuming thought. This is not to say that you should be completely self-sacrificing and think of others before yourself, but if you’re predominantly invested in your affairs without considering how you’re effecting other people, it’s a sure sign that you’re conceited.
Do you think you’re too conceited? How do you tell the difference between arrogance and confidence? Let us know in the comments.